Edit: I noticed the grammar mistake after posting and I'm sorry.

I've recently found out that men my age from my social circle are scared of me, because - I quote "you make yourself look too important" and I thought about it a lot this past weeks.

I like dressing somewhat elegantly and with a certain standard. My social circle dominantly consist of my colleagues at work - I'm a sales manager in mid to big company - and the dress code is rather casual as well as the customs. One of the girls my age from the office next door over is wearing those fluffy socks as work slippers (we're allowed to change shoes into some sort of slippers, which I never even considered and I'm not alone so I don't stand out there), and the absolute majority of people just wear plain t-shirts with prints and blue jeans.

The thing is that sometimes I dress really nicely and I like it, though it goes against the general idea of casual dressing at work. I wear skirts and dresses, sometimes heels, mostly I just take great care to look put together. I like button-downs and even began taking apart man's super oversized button-downs and sewing them into really nice dresses for summer - they're custom-fitted of course. For winter I've got a collection of classical wool and some cashmere sweaters and as soon as covid lifts I'm taking my new camel coat for a shoulder refitting to my seamstress (there are things I can't do at home, even though I graduated from fashion design).

I'm not trying to snub my coworkers, I just enjoy looking put together and be somewhat elegant. I did ballet for ten years so even my posture is somewhat better, which people commented on in past.

I ended up hanging out with people well beyond my usual circle - be it older coworkers or straight up bosses - and one of the reasons is that they do hold the doors for me, they do seem to appreciate my look, they do seem to hold some basic level of respect and an expectation towards me as a woman that I hold up for myself to as well. I can hang out with people my age and I do, sometimes, but there is roughness and ignorance and a certain level of a general disregard for etiquette and manners. I'm okay with fending for myself, I'm rather good at it, but not when I'm forced into a defensive stance in order to earn even the basic respect. I'm also not okay with using etiquette and manners as a reward or as attention - manners should be universal, when someone holds the doors for you alone, it's not manners, it's fake. They're not a gentleman, they're just trying to gain something. Why should I be okay with that?

Honestly, I don't think I make myself inaccessible, unapproachable - I'm just not taking shit from people that obviously only want to give me that, that's all. I'm okay with light-hearted flirting, not seriously intended, to brighten a day; I'm not a prude, and not everything man says means they are seriously interested. I'm all in for a good laugh and fun, with a touch of caring attitude: I've got a lot of herbal teas at work and a big jar of honey (plus cold and flu medicine) so that when I or my coworkers are feeling unwell I can make their day a little easier. I bake my coworkers birthday cakes and smaller pies for their names day.

My question...s are: I know I don't want to change, but how do I clear the misunderstanding? Is there something I may be missing? Something I should pay attention to more? Should I just not weigh myself down with this?