A romantic relationship, love aside, is an exchange of value. My hypothesis is that the only way to keep a relationship firm and strong, is for both partners to provide (or at least try to provide) value to the other. When both sides of the transaction are mutually beneficial, the relationship blossoms and takes root

From a man's perspective, this is why chasing and pedestalising women, commonly referred to as 'simping', will never be a good dating strategy. Say you succeed, and are now jumping through hoops to please a woman. Meanwhile she is graciously inputting her presence, and maybe her body. Well, she probably isn't very into you at all, and will almost certainly leave you eventually. Chances are, you are being used for whatever it may be - resources, sex, attention. Regardless you are probably a temporary holdover until a better man comes within reach. Many learn this the hard way. This is a woman you should be keeping casual if anything, but here you are cuffing like a buffoon. You're still a kid

Now flip the coin on its head. You meet a woman who reciprocates your interest from the beginning. You're not having to go out of your way to impress her, because she already likes being around you. When you do things for her, she's already doing things for you. When you please her, she's making the effort to please you. Equal value is flowing on both sides of the equation. This is it, heaven.... Shrek: "Like that's ever gonna happen"

Anyway based on the above, this is my dating advice to fellow men seeking a long term relationship with a high value woman.

Step 1 Increase your own value. There are a lot of common ways some of you are shooting yourselves in the foot which can be easily overcome. Beyond that, formulate a greater vision, some long term goal you can strive towards. And yes, you do need money. Not just for women, but for yourself first of all

Step 2 Become confident and capable of leading a group or handling awkward situations. Great way to increase confidence is to improve your body, get into a cool hobby, and real world practice in social settings

Step 3 Be your new confident self out there in various social circles (which you may need to build if you don't have already)

Step 4 Choose from the women who show you interest or give you signals. You're a fisherman and you've set your net. You've put in the work, now relax, and have fun meeting women

Step 5 How you proceed with women is up to you. If you are only looking for casual sex, be nice and make it clear to them from the get to. Otherwise if you're looking to cuff, go on dates and formulate a vetting process. If you value peace of mind you will be careful in picking out red flags. The life you build up should be like a peaceful sanctuary. If you're not protective over who you're letting in to your life, you need to go back to step 1

Well that's that, just a random rant stemming from the idea of transactional relationships. When both sides provide value, the transaction cancels itself out and allows true love to blossom. If you're in a one sided arrangement, you should really be looking to dip immediately before you're in too deep. Anyway I'm interested in hearing any thoughts on this matter!