Venting

Aquamarinade · 2023-10-26T20:03:38+00:00

The concept of people being “high value” or “low value” inherently stems from incel rhetoric. The large majority of people don’t talk or think this way.

ColdSnickersBar · 2023-10-26T20:37:14+00:00

The point is to grift you. To convince you to send your money to gurus.

This is one of the most insidious things about redpill. It teaches you to hate women, obviously, but it teaches you to also hate men because in the redpill fiction they must be your enemies competing with you for everything; and finally, it teaches you to hate yourself because you don’t drive a Lambo and have the perfect body.

The reason it teaches you to hate yourself is so that you feel like you have no choice but to love the guru and buy his products.

Turbulent-Estimate43 · 2023-10-26T20:07:22+00:00

Tbh you should just ignore that kind of advice. I’m super skeptical of all these dating coaches going around because I can’t help but look at that and think that it’ll just make men go in a spiral where they will feel like they’re never going to be good enough unless they have a bajillion dollars, a perfect body, multiple cars etc.

A lot of stuff in life pressures us to be number one, when in reality just being yourself and successful on your own terms is just fine. Even if that means you have a car from 10 years ago and just work a normal job.

luridlurker · 2023-10-26T20:24:19+00:00

Most of us are average so why is the content so focused on what the 1% of men want or how they live.

Any good salesman will sell you on a problem before they sell you the cure. Don't buy cures for problems you don't have. "High value" has no meaning.

Honest-Teas · 2023-10-27T00:06:09+00:00

You’re listening to the wrong advice. That’s not what you’ll hear outside RP/manosphere spaces.

You’re also perceiving a warped “reality” by only listening to stories that conform with this view.

What kind of advice would you like to get?

spiraldinosaur · 2023-10-27T11:15:01+00:00

If you're looking at "relationship advice" that focuses on being a "high value man", that's not dating advice; that's some kind of scam. It's shitty red pill content that's trying to get you to buy a course to become a "high value man".

I dunno where you're looking for this stuff, to be honest I've never actually looked online for dating advice. But if they're telling you that you have to pay all the bills and be "high value" that's utter bullshit and shouldn't be touched with a barge pole.

PutsWomenOnPedestal · 2023-10-26T19:34:06+00:00

So much relationship advice focuses on being a "high value man".

Where are you seeing this?

eatfleshdrinkblood · 2023-10-26T20:41:23+00:00

Yeah, this is largely what the dating advice for men is on Reddit. I still have anxiety that I have to be perfect in every aspect to get a girlfriend too. But irl it’s not as bad as what 4Chan,Reddit, red pillars/pink pillars and incels make it seem. And deep down I know this and I’m sure you do too. It’s just when you view that content they make things seem convincing and it makes things feel hopeless for guys like us who aren’t perfect and have flaws.

RobertB16 · 2023-10-26T22:32:42+00:00

1) The rhetoric online is completely different to the real rhetoric. Remember here voices get amplified in an eco-chamber, and controversial ideas are further amplified because it's more profitable. In the real world people don't speak like that. And when you see someone speaking like that, keep your distance from him/her.

2) Both man and woman questions are based on an incel-esque mentality. Sure, both are inherently different, but the root cause it's the same.

3) (Personal opinion) If you decide to go down that road, the correct answer should be "What can I offer to attract a "high-valuable partner"" rather than 'what can my partner offer to me'. Because you'll know by that time if it's worth it or not.

Ifhes · 2023-10-27T15:34:20+00:00

There's no such thing as "high value man". People will value you individually for what you mean for them, no matter what you are, no matter how good or how evil you are, how poor, how attractive, how successful. If you want to be more successful, more fit, more attractive, do it for yourself and what is better for your self development as a person, not because you want to fit an internet stranger's standards.

SweelFor- · 2023-10-27T08:46:40+00:00

I'm online a lot and I never see these things.

I know you're saying that to point out how stupid it is, but going one step further, my advice is to not even see it anymore.

Stop looking for it, and if the algorythms look for it for you, then block accounts, delete research histories, create new accounts, whatever it takes.

Unkl_Chng82 · 2023-10-27T16:32:31+00:00

The HVM/LVM/Alpha/Beta rhetoric you have to take with a grain of salt. In real life the Policeman married to the Nurse is totally fine and no one is better than the other. Not everyone is going to be in the 1% financially but, you can do well in life if you work hard, choose a good career. , chase after your life goals, etc. The real answer is if you live life a life of integrity, character, and do your best to do the right things with others you'll be attractive to others. Yes also it can be seen as competitiveness which is a flaw of human nature but don't let that effect you.

TelevisionGloomy5458 · 2023-10-28T12:07:38+00:00

It is crazy. It’s an internet ultimate reality. My nephews are cops, my mom’s a former nurse married to a farmer. My neighbor a fire fighter married to a nurse. These men and women are “high value.” Nurses, farmers, cops. Our society needs them.

Huge-Revolution9177 · 2023-10-29T21:13:08+00:00

I don't think that's the majority if relationship advice that's out there, I think that it's more if an issue on where you're sourcing it from.

Keep in mind that due to the various algorithms content sites and search engines use to individualize content push on us the more likely you are to encounter a sounding board that eventually cools you into thinking that this content is most if what is out there on "said" subject. In this case it's relationships.

I would advise being more self aware if this and being more proactive on managing your algorithm on various apps and search engines to avoid this.

Believe me this "high value men" schtick is not as prevalent in dating advice media as you may think.

Direct_Yesterday_349 · 2023-10-27T09:51:15+00:00

The problem is that people’s expectations, in particular that of women have changed. One can say those expectations in many cases are delusional to be frank. Obviously most people are average and always will be. Thus average people should generally pair up with other average people. Women are hypergamous so average guys will often have to pair up with below average women for things to work. Red pill coaches advise men to be their best self. If average , strive to become above average in whatever area is feasible. Let’s face it, with social media women who are below average have become used to getting short term attention often from above average men. This causes a false sense of what their value in the market place is. Despite often being used short term they go on elevating their standards and thus remain alone and frustrated despite there being a sea of adequate men at their level available whom they refuse to give the time of day. That’s the reality of the world we now live in. It’s incumbent upon men to be at their best to have a shot at opportunities. The statistics for lonely men are not encouraging and only trending in the wrong direction.

Pale-Kaleidoscope848 · 2023-10-27T15:05:39+00:00

Hm idk if this is a RP thing. I' ve seen a plenty of woman say this. For example there is a girl called Alexandra Chavez who gave this kind of advice, what is ironical is this. She always said a person has to date to someone equal or superior without the thinking in the economic part of the woman....

The point is a man always have to lower is standards to date with her, because she will never put any money in the table, the man is the one who has to give all and in case he fails, well he is a shit.

Narbonar · 2023-10-30T18:21:33+00:00

It’s setting an unrealistic standard so when their advice fails you blame yourself. Lots and lots of middle class people have successful relationships.

Resident_Outcome_945 · 2023-10-31T09:27:35+00:00

Preach

Title	Venting
Author	VariationArtistic518
Upvotes	15
Comments	27
Date	October 26, 2023 7:19 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/17h47xk/venting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/venting.1236442 https://theredarchive.com/post/1236442

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