Conventional wisdom quite rightly tells us that desperation is an enormous turn off, and thus one of the key reasons why alpha jock types do so well with women is because they show no such desperation and exude the aura that they don't need to gain the affection of any particular lady since they have more options than they know what to do with.

In my experience hanging out with these types of guys when I was younger and stupider, from speaking with women about their experiences with such men, and from observing them in the media, the truth is a lot of them are just as insecure, pathetic and desperate as anyone else.

Firstly, notice how quickly their bravado crumbles into desperation and bitterness when they're not getting the outcomes they want. I've been on a holiday with one such individual (a friend of a friend) whose entire persona shifted from cool calm and collected to jealous and belligerent in the span of a week without the action he thought he deserved.

It's no surprise - quite often their ability to attract women is the cornerstone of their self-worth, which naturally carries a certain level of fragility and desperation and bleeds through to anyone who isn't blinded by their charm, despite their best efforts to conceal it.

Then there's the fact that they do quite explicitly exhibit many of the same behaviors that would have others labelled as creeps, orbiters and simps. I've seen it firsthand; love bombing, begging and pleading, aggression, undermining self esteem, taking advantage of intoxicated ladies, stalking and harassing - think Noah from the Notebook - in a way that's often strangely accepted and unfortunately even rewarded.

Perhaps Chad Hogan is less likely to walk onto campus with an AR-15 and open fire or crawl into Stacey Brockmans air con vent to masturbate while she sleeps, although in saying this, and as counter to the narrative, the only guy I know who was pathetic enough to kill himself as an act of revenge against his cheating partner - throwing himself in front of a train no less - was a handsome champion sprinter and one of the more popular kids at my university.

In any case, it stands to reason that most people see what they want to see, and when it comes to good looking, athletic, popular, outgoing types, their creep radars are tuned way down or turned off entirely, and perhaps their only radar that's properly tuned is their disrespectful womaniser detector, however even if it's going off, that unfortunately isn't always a dealbreaker.

Of course there are some natural alpha types who are genuinely confident and don't resort to such desperate and disrespectful behavior, but they're exceptions to the norm, and they're never the ones making the most noise and bullying and bragging about their exploits.

Just some perspective

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