Girls at parties are a little too "open" for me...

redditor3000 · 2015-10-24T12:36:19+00:00

If you are looking for a girl who is ready to settle down and be in a nice, quiet monogamous relationship, anywhere that also has body shots and beer bonging going on is DEFINITELY the wrong place to be looking dude.

The_Turbinator · 2015-10-24T13:39:57+00:00

Where do I find these parties?

Anaron · 2015-10-24T11:34:54+00:00

So you flirted and kissed 8 or 9 girls and you're wondering if there's something wrong with you because you don't find that attractive. How would you feel about a girl that saw you do that and want nothing to do with you?

I dunno, is there something wrong with her?

If you're looking for a girlfriend, then act like it.

2015-10-24T12:10:25+00:00

Yes, you are a hypocrite

kensai01 · 2015-10-24T14:03:24+00:00

Wrong location. Don't hold back though, if you're in college you don't want a girlfriend right now. Focus on school and get with some girls for fun but nothing serious. Trust me. It's great having a girlfriend; but if you happen to have one FUCK YOU OVER during your time in school it can have a horrible effect on that semesters grades. Just a tip from someone who's been there.

wohl0052 · 2015-10-24T15:33:45+00:00

So you talked with and made out with multiple girls, but you're mad that they also talked to multiple guys, doing the exact same thing you were? Get over yourself

Beli_Mawrr · 2015-10-24T15:05:16+00:00

I think looking for a girlfriend at a frat party is a pretty amusing thing to do. Try some kind of club or group activity or coed sport.

keyboardsoldier · 2015-10-24T12:11:26+00:00

I've had something similar happen to me. Can someone with more experience chime in on what's their end game here? Or are they just having fun in the moment and nothing happens after?

O-D-I-L · 2015-10-24T10:49:18+00:00

Well I'm like you. I like to call myself old-school, or whatever, but that's the way I am. If I'm not confortable with something I don't like to have anything to do with it.

2015-10-24T20:06:53+00:00

Man, just stay aloof. If you had that much success in one night, then let that feed your ego, and instead of trying to find a girlfriend in a frat party, take the ego boost, rock out to "Staying Alive" on your MP3 player, skirt the town and use that confidence to meet the girl you want one on one.

Additionally, at the next party, a previously kissed girl might see you making out with another girl and get jealous. But sorostitutes don't generally make good wives; they have already shown their flippant "loyalty". This doesn't mean you shouldn't pick that low hanging fruit for a good time; just wear a condom. For fuck sakes, wear a condom.

If a girl puts out on the first night, you're either honestly the man of her dreams, which means she isn't going to be kissing anyone else at that party, or she's a histrionic slut.

To pine over one these chicks only shows low self-esteem. So instead, again, take the ego boost. I'm sure in one evening, surrounded by a party, where she has been making out with multiple guys, you will not have the where-with-all to determine if she is girlfriend material. Just relax. Even the girls you haven't kissed yet noticed that you're kissing all the girls and they were wishing they were wearing a wetsuit. sploosh

edit: just adding to it.

omark12 · 2015-10-24T10:21:33+00:00

Try not to be so judge mental. People just want to have fun, in a different environment these same girls could be awesome people.

mumblingstumbler · 2015-10-24T14:03:16+00:00

I had a crazy night in Vietnam once where everyone was drunk and it turned into a game of lets kiss everyone at the hostel bar. We were young and having fun and it broke the ice for some people who wouldn't have otherwise done it.

The next day we had bonded as a group and while it wasn't repeated again it was a funny, hazy memory we shared. No one looked into it any further than what it was, a drunken party.

The party your talking about sounds similar. Young, drunk girls who enjoyed a night out.

If you had of stuck with one all night, maybe she wouldn't have gone on to another bloke. Then again, it sounds like it was the kind of night where you wake up and go "fuck, I can't believe I did that"

If you want to meet a girl who doesn't do that kind of thing, try looking elsewhere. Don't read into it too much either and get a bad impression of women in general, most people don't go to parties and hook up with multiple partners. Unless it's that kind of party.

whattomybh · 2015-10-24T16:52:04+00:00

You are executing plan a of seduction but unhappy with it? Maybe this methodology isn't for you. Don't let that seem negative there is nothing wrong with that but seduction is all about the types of situations you described. If you are looking for someone reserved then this isn't for you.

kemar7856 · 2015-10-24T17:24:32+00:00

your looking in the wrong place this is like being in a strip club and then saying I don't like strippers

brjohns994 · 2015-10-24T17:43:11+00:00

You're looking at places where girls are just wanting to screw around. They're young and so are you. Have fun and you'll eventually get there.

VirtualAnarchy · 2015-10-24T18:36:25+00:00

Sometimes you just have to recognize that parties like those aren't your scene.

jackzander · 2015-10-24T21:27:48+00:00

So you wanted 8 or 9 girls to... what. Deny the attention of guys who swooped in after you?

I don't get it.

2015-10-24T23:14:09+00:00

Yea college/university houses with fresh/soph women who have no friends and are so desperate for friends they will even make out with total strangers for attention. Beware these chicks are probably open to sleeping around with men on tinder. Either get a ONS from them or talk to more steady women.

recyclablebantha · 2015-10-25T02:38:19+00:00

Okay, so you want something serious, right? With that in mind, here are some suggestions.

So I went to a party tonight.....

First off, realize that a lot of people are not oriented towards the most serious mindset in this situation. It's often more about fun.

....and I met a couple girls and talked to em and held hands plus a little bit of light kissing.

Couple things here:

You are actually coming off a little too open in this case. Holding hands is often on the emotional side. GFs and BFs walk around doing this. It's a small thing, but don't just offer it up for any girl who gives you a little attention. Little things like this establish healthy boundaries, instead of making it seem like you're opening up for anyone. When really you're after a specific thing. If you get along with a girl, then by all means engage in some touching/kino. But more sentimental PDAs like holding hands..... Reserve those. Have some discrimination, man.
When you were kissing these girls, why did the interaction come to an end?

But the problem is... I was definitely NOT the only guy that kissed/flirted with them like that.

This comes off like one of a few things.

Those girls were just looking for attention and playing the room. And unfortunately, it sounds like an ecosystem where the guys don't give a shit if the girls are acting foul and coming with shitty game. If they don't have the attention span to stick to an interaction with you, then they were looking for something different.
It's possible also that you were not holding down your end of the conversation, and they left because they were underwhelmed.

I mean they OFFERED me numbers and shit (I don't think it'll turn into anything) but they were just making out with people left and right.

If they were stepping away from you and just making out with another guy, even after kissing you and number closing you, then you're probably right..... the interaction sounds like garbage. Such a girl probably won't remember you the next day and is just in Pokemon Mode. (Gotta catch 'em all!)

Sounds like you're looking in the wrong places. To be honest, the parties you're describing are a little on the extreme end. Even most parties aren't like that. And even going out to clubs is not really like that either. Usually girls will end up being more discriminating and if a guy gets to the point kissing her, it's a better chance that it's on. I'd recommend quitting such parties. They sound kind of lame.

Unless you want to escalate within 30 minutes of meeting her, to having sex with her, and then watch her go off with another guy right after.

2015-10-25T09:58:44+00:00

What? Im looking for the total opposite. I have this girl texting me at the moment who apparently was in love with me for about 2 years. Her friend was sick of it so approached me and pointed out her friend and said 'my friend has fancied you for ages, can i have your number for her?'.she told me not to approach her because she was shy and would have been annoyed at the friend for telling me. She's hot, but not the most extrovert, kind of shy. Looking to pin me down and I'm not looking for that at the moment.

Nickdunn116 · 2015-10-24T15:56:26+00:00

We call those "sluts"

2015-10-24T15:14:36+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2015-10-24T12:14:21+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Girls at parties are a little too "open" for me...
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	73
Comments	72
Date	October 24, 2015 10:12 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3q0loc/girls_at_parties_are_a_little_too_open_for_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/girls-at-parties-are-a-little-too-open-for-me.1292996 https://theredarchive.com/post/1292996

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