Having trouble with this whole push-pull thing

cheddarchexmix · 2010-11-17T18:27:07+00:00

You should provide some examples.

But basically the "push" should usually be subtle, and used in direct correlation with how often the girl is hit on / how hot she is / how hot she thinks she is. If you ever get construed as an ass, you did it wrong.

If you've established a really light, playful frame (as you should), doing light push is easy and should be a semi-joke. "Oh my god you're so [ridiculous/shallow/weird/etc]!" with mock horror on your face, and a light push on her shoulder is one that works with almost any girl.

Subtly directing your attention away from her (by talking to the bartender, or other people in the set, or other sets) for brief periods of time before coming back to her is another one that works pretty much universally.

If you have really good kino going, then you suddenly withhold it during conversation, that's a subtle push. If she's on the hook, then you'll notice that she tries to continue/escalate kino. Withhold reciprocating just long enough until she appears to really notice, then come roaring back with a big hug or closer touch.

I don't do a ton of hardcore push/pull; for me it's mostly teasing and joking with her, feigning horror about things she tells me or does, etc. It needs to be congruent with who you are.

Mouthpiece · 2010-11-17T18:03:51+00:00

This is a great question. Upvoted.

Can you give specific examples of times you've pushed too hard?

throwawayrarst · 2010-11-17T19:20:54+00:00

I like to think of a push as a reason nothing ciould ever happen between you two and make it as ridiculous as possible.

"you're cool, too girls have cooties"

"...too bad you're such a dork"

"...too bad I don't like brunettes"

"...took bad you go to [whatever school]"

"...too bad you drink rye"

BeInThisMoment · 2010-11-17T20:41:47+00:00

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EthicalReasoning · 2010-11-17T21:15:26+00:00

you know that awkward feeling of insecurity you get when you're interacting with someone and they start to ignore you or say something harsh towards you? that's the feeling you are trying to create, but then you need quickly to relieve that feeling with warmth. just dont let the shitty feeling linger for too long (unless you've already slept together, then you can let it linger for weeks and completely control her desire for you).

be an asshole then be nice, be nice then be an asshole, just be inconsistent and unpredictable. women love inconsistent assholes, it's amazing.

Weaponized_Dairy · 2010-11-18T00:19:06+00:00

"Push and Pull" from my understanding is not just the neg, or texting game, or frame...its all of those combined for a symphony of seduction.

Push and Pull takes on various forms depending on your venue, time allotted, girl's level of interest in you, etc etc.

Push and Pull can happen in 1 or 2 hours, or over a course of the entire relationship, even into marriage. It is a constant demonstration of your overall game.

Women that are really into you don't require much push, however it should be done, and with some level of frequency to keep her wanting more. This would include but not limited to: playful negging, making plans for activities that do not include her, not returning calls or texts right that second, being fashionably late for meet ups.

For women that are not as into you the Push comes in the form of "make her chase you" or the "cat and string" method. Withholding game if you will, showing her that you "have it" but it may not be available for her.

In any Pull situation, never supplicate. In any push situation, be willing to lose her. Your Push and Pull is only as strong as your overall Game.

PhiLLyinDaLLaS · 2010-11-17T18:24:53+00:00

I've done the same thing when I first started improving my game...it mostly comes down to reading somebody...I've always been excellent at reading body language, so when I get red flags that I was a little harsh, I'll just give a small compliment or something to soften the blow. If they're really into you, they can get over things pretty quickly.

TooEmbarassed · 2010-11-17T18:24:10+00:00

Whoa, long post, too long to read. But interesting. Tell me more of your story.

Is that push/pull?

throwawayrarst · 2010-11-17T19:20:54+00:00