Went to a nightclub last night - not sure if I'm ugly or not now :/

DudeWithHoodie · 2015-05-08T16:51:13+00:00

I'm black as well and have gotten dances at a club plenty of times.

What I do is usually just hit the dance floor, have some fun and if I see a girl I want to dance with, I almost always approach from the front. If not from the front, I go to the side and make sure she see's me making eye contact first, then if the situation allows, I'll butt bump her...yup, a butt bump.

Woman won't usually start dancing with you straight off the bat, it's kind of like a mating ritual, you show her what you got and SMILE/HAVE FUN WITH IT. If she your digs "sweet moves" she'll move with you, and that's when you take her hand and start dancing together. Don't always hold her though, take your hands off her while dancing every now and then and just enjoy her company on the floor. Hope that helped.

throwawaytc123 · 2015-05-08T17:52:04+00:00

Something I had to learn the hard way is: go into a situation like this with an air of detatchment. Don't go to a bar or club looking like Elmer Fudd hunting Bugs Bunny, it's incredibly obvious and makes people brand you a creeper.

2015-05-08T17:21:05+00:00

Woah didn't think this many people would respond, just felt kinda down this morning - really appreciate it :)

DaygameCoach · 2015-05-08T16:53:13+00:00

The height is an advantage, not a disadvantage.

A lot of girls make out in clubs to relieve sexual tension and then are done. There is a push pull kind of way to make out without allowing them to do that...but making out with them in a public place in front of their friends shows you are not discrete and also may make it harder to pull them. I remember Nick Quick (same day lays master) saying that he didn't make out with them till he pulled them home. No, this most likely isn't about attractiveness...but probably about outer game including dress style, confidence, body language, approach, etc.

Self limiting belief: If you think you are ugly, you are. If you think being black is a problem, it is. Anyway, a lot of attraction with women is about how you make them feel.

Cuisine, Daygamer.net

Madafaka_Jones · 2015-05-08T14:59:03+00:00

Dude being black has nothing to do with it at all, maybe you're just lacking confidence. Normally girls don't frown/ scowl at guys unless they are doing something that bothers them. Cheer up and approach with confidence mate.

ThatAgnosticGuy · 2015-05-08T20:55:55+00:00

Black and 6'0.

I usually go to hiphop clubs too because I simply love the twerk. A lot of DMV parties involve dancing with someone else. Seems to me that all you have to do is dance well and not stand creepily. I'm always cranking while the music's playing. Knowing who seems willing to dance with a partner and when helps. If she's talking, standing, texting, or not on the dance floor, obviously you'll be rejected regardless of who you are. Waiting for the right song is a good idea. If anything by Beyonce, Trey Songz, or 90% of Chris Brown's music comes on I'm not making any attempts.

When that Juvenile joint comes on, Migos, gogo, women will be more open to dance because that music is made/very compatible to get a dance to. If she's standing there shaking her ass to trap music then that's a much better time to make an attempt. With that being said there are always going to be women who will curve you but you it happens to everyone.

Knowing how to dance is very important along with being confident and smooth with your actions. I have had girls approach me to dance because of this. Don't hover and hesitate.

PowerSeductionWar · 2015-05-08T17:56:14+00:00

it's not your looks, its your vibe.

If you were uncomfortable, you'll make others feel uncomfortable and naturally repel them

stouch · 2015-05-08T19:35:00+00:00

How are your dance moves? Don't know where I heard this but apparently girls are attracted to guys who can dance. So try not to look too awkward on the dance floor, take some dance classes.

I was on the dance floor almost the whole time doing my thing

Do you work up a sweat in the nightclub? If so, make sure you have good body hygiene and make sure to freshen up before approaching girls, go to the bathroom and dry yourself, some nightclubs have deodorants and such, use it.

Above all, be confident, approach and talk to girls as if you known them for a while, be yourself.

Icebreaker tip: Most girls spend a lot of time to try to look pretty for the night, find a way to recognize that. Most likely they will appreciate someone noticing their effort. So compliment them, but not like most guys do, i.e. you have a nice smile, nice eyes, etc...they probably heard that a thousand times. Be creative, be original. Maybe try complimenting something they are wearing, or their makeup. Something like this: 'Those are nice color pumps, looks great with your outfit, I might get me a pair lol, where did you get them from?' You obviously not buying high heels, but this is just a way for you to be silly and try to make them laugh and at the same time, letting them know that I noticed something about you that is not your tits or butt, I'm paying attention to you.

Good luck young grasshopper!

EDIT: Formatting

DaygameCoach · 2015-05-08T15:20:29+00:00

You realise being ugly or handsome, short or tall, white or negro, means shit all? Its all about the vibe your putting out. Just assume all those shawtys have got dat dere jungle fever for a bbc like yours, and stop giving a fuck about how they respond to you. They can tell if you care what they think. You say your just having fun and dancing, but you sound like you care. so fuck that noise. Square up to one and introduce your self. if they respond shitty, its ok. You'll learn. If they respond well and like you, cool but its also no big deal. You still party on regardless.

theunknowncompanion · 2015-05-09T06:12:51+00:00

Some girls just want to go to a nightclub to dance? Not all girls want to be hit on or made out with... I speak from experience. Also from experience, the really 'hot' ones usually are more... snarky and won't be as receptive.

nfornear · 2015-05-09T08:54:25+00:00

Hey man. I'm black as well and the problem definitely isn't that, although I don't have the, what you might call, a stereotypical black personality what a lot of black people have in my opinion, or at least some traits. For some while I thought I should have at least some of those traits. That didn't solve anything. What solves it is you just being comfortable with being you and then it doesn't really matter. Girls will like you if you are just confident and comfortable with yourself. And some might like you extra for being black, and some won't like you at all for it, but that is just a small percentage. Just be (the best version) of you.

2015-05-09T11:19:19+00:00

95% of guys are ugly. Look around you. The difference with the successful ones is they don't behave like they are ugly.

stouch · 2015-05-08T16:37:13+00:00

I'm black and that doesn't really help.

...

Well damn :(. If that's the case. Maybe the girls who talk about sucking my big black dick when I text them are being sarcastic.

The scowling and frowning is gonna be a reaction to your vibe and demeanor and body language. Be a bit more cocky about things. Know it's going to go well (by looking for girls checking you out.) so you can be more confident once you go up.

2015-05-08T19:57:24+00:00

when I DO get a dance/makeout with a girl at a club

Clubs aren't for dance/makeouts wtf?! Dance in the club, make out later.

Title	Went to a nightclub last night - not sure if I'm ugly or not now :/
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	43
Comments	54
Date	May 8, 2015 2:54 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/35ao4q/went_to_a_nightclub_last_night_not_sure_if_im/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/went-to-a-nightclub-last-night-not-sure-if-im-ugly.1387856 https://theredarchive.com/post/1387856

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