I suck at physical escalation.

stealthcreeper · 2016-01-07T19:26:05+00:00

See it like a game.

Every time you pass a test you can go to the next level.

For example:

1- you touch her hand

2- you touch her arm

3- you touch her shoulder, or back and lower back

4- you put your arm around her shoulders, or lower back

5- you touch her hair

6- you touch her face

7- you kiss her

(notice that as you do this you are getting closer and closer to her personal space, thus creating attraction and comfort)

if she reacts bad at any stage, just back down and try again

don't be afraid to persist, and remember that no matter what you say, it is the psysical interaction that ultimately makes them attracted and sexually comfortable with you

Lichcrow · 2016-01-07T21:26:33+00:00

I have this problem too, i can't really feel comfortable touching girls cause i feel like it's either out of place or sometimes rude :/ I can't really understand when i can advance.

J_Dilla_ · 2016-01-07T21:33:36+00:00

Get Ozzie RSD's book "The Physical Game" and soak it all up. Bit of a long read but it's the best RSD product by a landslide. A PDF was floating around, hmu if you're stuck.

It'll change your whole "game" and your whole attitude towards what's important and what's completely irrelevant. It'll obviously give you a good blueprint for escalation too.

AndroWanda · 2016-01-07T22:17:33+00:00

DiCarlo escalation ladder.

Popeman79 · 2016-01-07T21:43:49+00:00

Physical escalation is really not about the touch itself. It is meant to show how real your displayed confidence is. Think about is this way: if you have a little sister, you can grab her hair playfully, hug her, etc. Some of it she might like, some of it not, but you won't care. You'll do it in absolute confidence.

You can seem very confident with your smooth talk and all, but the next stage is to be confident on all levels. Once it's established, the physical escalation becomes more sexual (she's not your lil sister anymore).

TheMinistryOfAwesome · 2016-01-07T19:38:37+00:00

You answered you own quetstion - "I am scared or shy". Basically there isn't any kind of problem with touching people. Playfully pushing people, shaking their hand, using your hand/arm to guide them in a direction you want...

As long as you're not trying to finger bang before introducing yourself - you can mostly win. If you're "too intimate, too early" then that's why it's bad.

It happened to me recently (think i mentioned in another post) i was trying to guess a girl's age and i cupped her chin/jaw and started trying to make her move her head from side to side, to let me inspect her. But being drunk, and not giving her enough indictation about what i was doing meant she responded in a "wtf" kind of manner. Didn't even say anything bad, If i'd have pulled it back a bit i could have conitnued the interaction, despite the fuck up, but instead i pushed it further and said she looked 60. She got offended and fucked off - didn't speak to her again.

0 fucks given. I made a mistake, I learned - and i went too far that time, too quickly, that time. Nothing bad happened at all. But up until that point she'd been flirting, happy to talk with me, I had my hand on her waist, on her hand, around her shoulders etc.

Was all fine.

Basically you don't suck, you just don't do it. Do it... if you physically escalate 100 times and fuck it up 99 times out of 100, then you suck and you can whine.

If you don't attempt it you can't say you suck, only that you're too much of a pussy to do it.

And despite the general consensus here, in this situation at least, sucking is better than pussy.

AttractandSeduce · 2016-01-07T22:12:23+00:00

I would also add that I recommend making it a habit to touch almost everyone that you associate with.

I'm sure you know of some cultures that are more touch then others. For the cultures that are a bit more "touchy" with each other it's usually easy for the guys to physically escalate because they have the habit of being more touchy.

When you touch early in your interactions, people including women will think it's part of who you are and will not come across as creepy or weird.

Touch early and make it look as natural as possible.

Remember, women are like ovens, they take more time to really get warmed up for the most part.

Avicenna1 · 2016-01-08T00:44:20+00:00

Stop sucking. It seriously makes huge difference. It establishes dominance so much more than you'd think on a subconscious level. I've been doing night game a lot recently and the minute I break the touch barrier, girls receptivity shoots up like nothing.

tnorth23 · 2016-01-08T14:51:46+00:00

Force yourself to do it. That was the only thing that worked for me. I felt uncomfortable at first but then it became natural.

Electricshephard · 2016-01-08T00:50:35+00:00

I have the exact same problem. I'm very "touchy" with girlfriends, or bros. But I almost petrify as soon as I know I should escalate physically!

female_redditor_pmme · 2016-01-08T05:18:16+00:00

Simple solution- drink more!

Just kidding obviously

down_R_up_L_Y_B · 2016-01-08T05:25:01+00:00

One way to lose this inhibition is to start touching everyone. What I mean is touch people while conversing with them whether they are known to your or a complete stranger, guys or girls it doesn't matter. Do it so that it happens organically, so that physical contact with someone else doesn't feel foreign. Once you get used to it, you'll begin to feel more comfortable doing it to a girl you're trying to rap to. It will just be natural.

whosewineisthis · 2016-01-08T06:58:24+00:00

Read stealthcreeper's post, memorize it, and then just do it next time you're talking to an attractive woman. If you're anxious you're probably overthinking, so don't think about it, just do it.

shaggylookalike · 2016-01-08T16:47:36+00:00

The thing is for me, is that I'm afraid that I will lose the girl's respect or that she'll think I'm a creep or an idiot. I'm very good at talking to girls, making them laugh, and they do like my company, but once I start to try and touch them I feel bad :(

Ravnurin · 2016-01-08T18:28:39+00:00

I used to suck ass at touching and escalation, but I guess you could say I 'cracked the code' for the lack of a better explanation. Read my blog post(see below) and apply everything in it, and I guarantee you that the girl will never have met anyone else as aggressive/touchy as you. Women make decisions about a guy, ESPECIALLY at bars/clubs, based on how aggressive you are. Because they don't wanna go home with some guy who isn't going to be able to seal the deal. They want the most dominant guy they can find, which is why touching is so, so crucial. You just cannot skip out on touching.

See my post here: http://socialmasteryrb.blogspot.co.uk/2015/07/how-touching-gets-you-laid.html?m=1

Also, if you PM me I'll tell you another touching secret I can 100% guarantee you no one else knows about, which I haven't covered in my blog post either.

Title	I suck at physical escalation.
Author	seductionnoodle
Upvotes	171
Comments	37
Date	January 7, 2016 6:35 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3zwsjh/i_suck_at_physical_escalation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-suck-at-physical-escalation.1400308 https://theredarchive.com/post/1400308

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