How do you 'Next' without being an asshole?

billyty81 · 2014-09-04T16:59:59+00:00

When you figure that one out, write a book and retire off the millions you make

Humankeg · 2014-09-04T16:10:53+00:00

This sounds like it will be an ongoing problem going forward. Need to stick to your guns after breaking up with her as you have just made things worst than they were before by taking her back.

A girl like this loves drama, lives off of it. She wants it in her life and better if she is the star of the show. She needed her fix and you gave into it by supporting her behavior. She's going to want another fix soon and now knows that you will tolerate it and even partake in the drama.

AFPJ · 2014-09-04T19:19:51+00:00

Nexting isn't something people need advice on. Sounds like the undertone is how to avoid nexting.

once a week where she will create some magical drama to try and fight me/get my attention

Sounds like too much AF/Dread and not enough BB/Comfort in the mix, adjust appropriately. You're captain, but you still need to know whether your crew needs food or water, encouragement or a bitch-slap, sleep or exercise.

How do I shut off my subconscious effort to quell this bitches tears?

Denying instinct is difficult but exposure therapy trumps all. After enough times you'll just grow numb to it. Much like in war, when you kill someone you don't think of them as a person with emotions, friends, family & loved ones.

Archwinger · 2014-09-04T23:01:03+00:00

How do you 'Next' without being an asshole?

Why do you care? You're dumping her.

If the situation were reversed, she wouldn't be considering your feelings.

Dakenfr · Thu Sep 4 17:25:31 2014 UTC

Stage an accident, even get the local newspaper to talk about you.
Hire a few actors to attend the burial.
Then change your name and hit on her again pretending your her ex's doppleganger.

leodoestheopposite · 2014-09-04T16:52:05+00:00

Continue spinning her, in your mind downgrade her from main plate to secondary or even tertiary plate; in the meanwhile get your kinks out, explore sexual fetishes, ask for a FFM 3some with her friend Jenny, car head, sex in semi-public places.

Get some experience, keep on pushing the envelope.

El_Serpiente_Roja · 2014-09-05T01:32:37+00:00

I agree with Rollo about this...

the alpha man has to deal with women hating or loving him because of his actions, the beta male always tries to do the thing will ease to womens pain or be best for her, thats how you get friendzoned or manipulated or stuck in some bs ...you already figured its in your best interest to next her, she may hate you for it no matter how you do it

a consequence of nexting a girl is that she might cry and hate you, hold frame and leave

mrpoopistan · 2014-09-04T16:25:48+00:00

Who fucking cares?!

Come on! Women don't give a flying fuck when they dump men.

Drop some woman bullshit on her. "I don't feel like our personalities are really compatible or some shit."

Be sadistic about it. Draw it all out. Make her cry like she has a compound fracture.

deville05 · 2014-09-04T18:29:26+00:00

People dont like being rejected. Before we found this sub we too handled rejection like that. I think its normal but you really have to be hardened. Women are the puppy dogs of the species. They have evolved into gaining sympathy. There is no other way I think.

TheRealMewt · 2014-09-04T19:06:44+00:00

You have a better chance of learning how to stop time than you have of not looking like an asshole when you next a girl.

Don't let the crocodile tears mess with your head. If you keep taking her back, she'll be the one making you cry when she realizes you'll put up with all of her bullshit.

kami_kakushi · 2014-09-04T19:15:21+00:00

just tell her you want to to fuck other people too, and you arent ready to settle.

you dont have to make the choice, just lay down in front of her who you are, and what you want out of your life, then leave the next choice up to her; it is up to her whether she then stays or goes

4rpta · 2014-09-04T19:27:08+00:00

If you tell her what you're doing and why, "I feel there's a lot of drama you're bringing to the plate, I will not tolerate that. Goodbye." This isn't an asshole thing to do. You're watching out for your interests, and you're being straight up.

Of course, she'll call you an asshole, but that's the natural reaction to having shit ripped from you, even if that shit was ripped justly.

It's been 10 months. You're not gonna do this without making her cry.

ozarkrider15 · 2014-09-05T17:04:34+00:00

Idk about avoiding tears but the best course of action is to always break up with her in a semi public place. Somewhere that will hopefully dampen any drama she might cause and also a place you can leave when you feel you have sufficiently nexted her. For an added bonus, don't go home after you do it either. The last LTR I broke up with I planned a like 4 day trip to my friends place about an hour away with out her knowing. That way you don't have to worry about her showing up crying on your porch again.

tombreck2 · 2014-09-04T16:19:49+00:00

"Fine another chance. Her tears are fucking kryptonite."

You felt bad about another person who was upset and that's a good trait to have. I've been in your exact situation and when you break up with her a second time it will be a lot easier.

"You're a really sweet girl but we should see other people."

[deleted] · 2014-09-04T18:39:03+00:00

I would push her to do the craziest things I could come up with. Rough anal all the time, threesomes, cooking, picking up my stuff, whatever. Either she'll do it all or she'll leave on her own. Either way, you win. Again, I would do that.

LandShark805 · 2014-09-04T19:33:42+00:00

When you realize that 90% of tears that flow from a woman are done purely to have an impact on you; you'll gain contempt for the manipulative ploy.

mbillion · 2014-09-04T23:13:09+00:00

Let me tell you something, when you do not just give everything to a woman she wants she is going to think you are an asshole. Even if its the best, most rational, fair, equitable and humane thing to do if the whiny little bitch does not get what she wants she is going to cry and call you an asshole

Atheisticles · 2014-09-05T02:20:01+00:00

Go into beta mode.

niczar · 2014-09-04T18:39:19+00:00

Does she read 50 shades? Tell her you're only interested in a D/s relationship, tell her she has to wear a dog collar when she's at your place and is not to speak unless spoken to. From now on she has to refer to you as "sir" even in the presence of strangers.

Either she'll run away screaming or she'll agree to the plan.

Either way, problem solved.

redpillshadow · 2014-09-04T18:17:56+00:00

Reminds me of one 4chan story where anon tried to find out how hard he could push the envelop until she couldn't be with him anymore... wait you said without being an asshole.

mbillion · 2014-09-04T20:28:59+00:00

Damn! I'm in the same situation, but I was planing on downgrading her to keep as a maintenance bang for once in a while.

Any tips for downgrading her instead of nexting her?

Title	How do you 'Next' without being an asshole?
Author	causemose
Upvotes	16
Comments	43
Date	September 4, 2014 4:00 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2fgpjt/how_do_you_next_without_being_an_asshole/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-you-next-without-being-an-asshole.141880 https://theredarchive.com/post/141880

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