Went for kiss close, got rejected hard, feel weird

jack12ka4 · 2019-10-17T21:53:03+00:00

quick question. Did you specifically ask her to go out on a date ?

UneAmi · 2019-10-18T01:40:07+00:00

This has happened to all guys. I think too many online tips guys to just go for the kiss and see what happens. This works well with inexperienced girls at a nightlife scene. Outside of that, I won't do it.

minorstyle · 2019-10-17T22:22:55+00:00

Kind of weird of her to go out with you on two dates and then have that reaction. Why even bother with the second date. However, you're right, you should have made the move on the first date when she was over at your place.

RaptorMan333 · 2019-10-18T00:09:02+00:00

Sounds like you dodged a bullet honestly. Seems like your game wasn't on point based on what you said (no offense) or you might have gotten farther with her, but it's probably not even worth it, and she might have just rejected you just for the fuck of it or for an ego boost. Having her over and not making a move was a crucial mistake. She doubtless would have been down to hookup the first night if you went for it. It is almost an absolute certainty that if a girl comes to your place during the date, she is willing to have sex. You should at least always operate under this assumption.

"Go for no" is a good mentality to have, and it's good that you went for it the second date, but again, needed to push for it on the first date. Most girls will respect you more EVEN if they reject you the first time you go for the kiss because you actually went for it and were unaffected when they turn away. No big deal - roll it off and try again later. This girl was one of those rare cases where they overreact. A lot of those feminist types like being very aggressive and get a huge boost from leading a guy on and rejecting them. I stopped going for them altogether. They're very weird - they seem to only respond to very strong willed guys that go for what they want and lead, and will eat weaker guys for breakfast, but at the same time seem to resent that a guy is being dominant and lash out at it. Again - weird. She was probably just irritated because she was attracted to you and you waited that long to do something about it.

Don't let it scare you off escalating. Let me reiterate - this is a VERY rare case that a girl will be that aggressive. If a girl goes out with you she is open to kissing you if you don't screw it up.

Next time I would ask to use her bathroom and try to get her to bring you inside. Then, once you're inside, after you use the bathroom, just start hanging out with her and escalate. Sounds like it was one of those weird cliche moments where you walk her to the door and then semi-awkwardly go for the kiss.

abascaburger · 2019-10-17T21:40:30+00:00

"men only want one thing and its disgusting" /s

At least you were respectful, she should've given you the same courtesy. FDB

ChrisDarmount · 2019-10-18T03:25:11+00:00

Ideally, you should’ve gone for the kiss on the first date while she was at your place. However I don’t think you should beat yourself up over this. And I don’t think it’s a fatal mistake either. I mean, shit happens and things aren’t going to be perfect all the time.

I think you absolutely did the right thing by going for the kiss on a second date. Perhaps she’s weird or perhaps you missed calibrate and it came off as creepy. Regardless you absolutely did the right thing. You put yourself in a situation where you would either succeed or learn. If you hadn’t gone for the kiss then you would’ve done neither of those things.

I think you should be patting yourself on the back.

ChrisDarmount · 2019-10-18T04:09:40+00:00

Yeah actually I always go for the kiss at the end of the first date at the latest. The reason is because if they don’t want to kiss me at the end of the first date, then it ain’t going anywhere anyway and I know to forget about her and not worry about pursuing. Like if she wasn’t ready to kiss me at the end of the first date but still would have gone on a second date with me, that would be a time wasting situation.

And a few times I’ve thought the girl wasn’t interested at the end of the first date and then when I went in for the kiss, it was ON.

It’s just a great way to see where things stand and polarize the interaction.

LoveNotH86 · 2019-10-18T12:38:14+00:00

I wouldn’t lose sleep over it. In my experience women like this reject as a play to feel powerful. She was out with you and in your place while in a full blown relationship. She probably just wanted to know she was desired by another man and wanted to see how far she could take it without actually cheating.

GeckoVanderwahl · 2019-10-18T14:15:25+00:00

That's a pretty cringe line. "I heard girls from your country are good kissers" 🤮

What this is indirectly telling her is your interested in her for the novelty of her being foreign. No girl wants to feel like a novelty bang. That and she told you she had a boyfriend, she clearly thought you were being a platonic friend up until this point.

Woujo · 2019-10-18T04:41:17+00:00

You are clearly leaving out parts of the story. You did some shit to creep her out. You were needy and too aggressive. Dont do that. You always show a little less interest in her than she shows in you. Thats the key for not looking too forward or creepy.

Frenchhelp101 · 2019-10-17T21:40:02+00:00

You must be willing to lose her.

axe122 · 2019-10-18T01:44:54+00:00

It was the first night that you blew it, she was at your apartment and ready for you but when you didn’t pull the trigger she snapped outa the emotional state she was in and didn’t value you as much as her current boyfriend. That’s why she acted like that was cuz she was pissed by her actions or almost fucking you and was turned off by your inaction and then made it like it was your fault she even almost cheated.

Title	Went for kiss close, got rejected hard, feel weird
Author	Frenchhelp101
Upvotes	14
Comments	38
Date	October 17, 2019 9:17 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/djcwnm/went_for_kiss_close_got_rejected_hard_feel_weird/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/went-for-kiss-close-got-rejected-hard-feel-weird.1481457 https://theredarchive.com/post/1481457

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