You can have a meaningful purpose, you can have plates spinning/FWBs, you can live a dgaf lifestyle. But if you have attachment issues and/or unresolved trauma they will come out the moment you start falling for any woman (esp real 10s) that you pull. And you will push her away with that.

It doesn’t matter how intimate and comfortable she had gotten with you, it doesn’t matter that the bedroom was a waterpark early on, it doesn’t matter that you traveled and she talked about a future with you.

1.5mo in I fumbled hard with insecurity and issues that caused me to add pressure. I wanted to know where she was on exclusivity because I was insecure and I knew I would cut things off when she said she wasn’t there yet. I did. And what I didn’t realize was the turmoil I would feel. It hit hard. And I tried to game it back over 2 weeks. Ended up playing that like an idiot, and spilling emotions (just too intense, enough to push her away). The truth was the moment I started to gain feelings I wanted to run. And I could never be present, doomed to fail. It wasn’t even about jealousy, it was about abandonment.

Otw to a therapist. Back to other options and less than 10s. Back to work.