How to be happy when emotionally depleted/burnt out?

petitguelah · 2026-02-10T17:58:09+00:00

why does he want you to have a job? If he can't afford to have you not work full time, can he at least afford a house keeper/weekly chef so you can do the fun part (happy wife, intimacy?)

It seems super imbalanced. I don't think this falls ALL on you. You're already tapped out. He can maybe get a raise? Or a higher paying job?

Maybe focus your energy on encouraging him in that direction. This is tricky! And the essence of RPW.

No amount of self care can make up for complete burnout. Those are lazy answers imo. We're here to talk to other women about having our needs met with love and care from our men, not how to NOT have needs. You'll end up resentful.

yourworkmom · 2026-02-10T16:49:42+00:00

How is your self care? Are you sleeping well? You need to fo things that give you dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin. What a comedy, walk outside, talk to a close friend. You cannot be the GOFL if you don't take care of you.

NationalMouse · 2026-02-10T17:31:47+00:00

I came here to say self-care and I see that’s the general consensus here😂 I feel sexiest when I’m wearing cute little outfits around my husband and take 15 minutes to do up my makeup, even if I don’t go anywhere that day. Eat healthy food and get some sunshine. Become obsessed with yourself.

CountTheBees · 2026-02-10T22:00:43+00:00

What is your to-do list? How important can it be if it's not done regularly anyway? I just don't do stuff that I don't want to do, and I don't worry about it anymore, so it's off my mind. If it really stressed me out I will tell my husband about it and he can either offer an alternative solution, tell me it doesn't matter, or do it himself.

Work stress is something that gets better with age and experience. I get much less stressed about work now than I did in my 20s. Not particularly helpful to you but it may be good to look at the long view rather than the "this is how it is and how it always will be". Is your manager supportive? You can ask to be placed into another team or rotated into another project, or ask your triggering coworker to be rotated on to another team, if your work is structured to allow that. Changing responsibilities/teams is good for perspective.

Have a way to turn your mind off when you come home, a regular routine. It can be playing a puzzle game or watching TV or whatever it is. But give yourself space to relax before starting to think about everything else.

It sounds like you're just stressing yourself out by caring about a lot of stuff that won't get done anyway. If you already know it won't get done just take it off your list and leave it for the weekend/spring cleaning/etc. and cut your daily responsibilities way down.

Desperate_Rice8625 · 2026-02-11T00:46:24+00:00

I struggle with this in many ways too - something that has helped me is carving out some time to reset myself - at the start of the day before working and at the end of the day before I walk through the door. This might take some real intention when you work from home, but it really helped me. For example, in the morning, I now get up much earlier than before and make it my gym time. This helps me take care of my body (for myself and for him) and gets good healthy bloodflow pumping! At the end of the day, I have a little daily reflection book in my car, after parking, I spend a few minutes reading it and doing some reflection of my own. These little buffer times have been a game changer for me because they really help to reset your energy and your mood. Especially if work is sad or feels endless (both personally and professionally) it's important to have a small ritual that keeps you grounded.

Jenneapolis · 2026-02-10T16:51:35+00:00

The answer to issues like this is always self-care. I know that probably feels like just another thing to do on your list, but it’s going to be important because you should be focusing on your happiness first. You cannot make your husband happy if you are not happy. I can’t say what this looks like for you because it’s different for everyone but you need to figure out how to make yourself happy. You need to figure out how to not take on the weight of the world’s problems. Again, I can’t quite tell you how because this looks different for everyone. For me, my focus on spirituality and the community associated with my religion, spending time in nature (honestly just sitting on the patio on a sunny day does enough) , pursuing hobbies and staying physically active does it.

AutoModerator · 2026-02-10T16:40:05+00:00

Title: How to be happy when emotionally depleted/burnt out?

Author MajesticShare2232

Full text: My husband had a vulnerable moment with me last night. He said the two things he wants from me as a show of love is 1) my making his lunches, which is no problem at all and something I do regularly, and 2) not surprisingly, intimacy.

I feel awful because when I get home from work, I'm so exhausted and feel like I don't have anything left to give, but my husband wants me to work. I wish I could just work part time and I told him that last night that that would be my preference, but I don't know if anything would come from it.

I know everyone is going to tell me to find a less stressful job, but I've worked at a few different places and my current company is the best. I have a hybrid job where I can work from home 2 days a week, the PTO is generous and I have opportunities to earn even more PTO. I have flexibility to do what needs to be done in the middle of the day if I have an appointment or something. They really strive to be family friendly and prioritize work life balance.

But I am a highly sensitive person and empath and I struggle with not letting other peoples emotions and negativity take me down. I currently have an employee that stresses herself out and it stresses me out. So then I go home and am emotionally depleted and that affects my relationship.

Back to our conversation from last night, he said that when he comes home and I am sad, he gets sad and doesn't want to try to pursue intimacy. And rightly so, because I'm not in that headspace. So I guess ultimately, my question is how can I work on being the happy wife for when he gets home and get into the headspace to be ready for intimacy? I feel like my todo list just continues when I get home, but I don't have any energy for any of it. Does anyone do anything in particular that helps them?

Sometimes I feel like I'm doing it wrong because I don't stay home and then that weighs on me too.

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InevitableKiwi5776 · 2026-02-11T15:55:53+00:00

Being so freaked out about cleaners coming to your house is not normal. Also you rejected your husband’s solution to this problem which is not letting him lead. Your decision to remain stressed about house cleaning when there’s a solution at hand is controlling and rigid.

ArdentBandicoot · 2026-02-11T00:38:47+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	How to be happy when emotionally depleted/burnt out?
Author	MajesticShare2232
Upvotes	6
Comments	41
Date	February 10, 2026 4:40 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1r15qyy/how_to_be_happy_when_emotionally_depletedburnt_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-to-be-happy-when-emotionally-depletedburnt-out.1573183 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573183

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