Hi ladies! I'm hoping you guys can give me some more clarity on whats going on, or give me some new ideas or insight on how to rectify this. Basically, my SO and I have some sex issues. Not serious ones, but enough to make me seek advice from you lovely ladies.

7 months ago we went on a brief break - a very much needed break as us as individuals and our relationship were both on a downward spiral (it was okay, but not healthy or sustainable). 5 months ago, we got back together and I've put RPW into full swing. I dress more feminine which he has always specified his preference for, I curl my hair and keep it long and dark brown (the colour he likes), I work out 5 days a week and am thin and toned but with sizeable boobs and a big butt (he is a butt man). I cook daily, clean every weekend like clockwork and keep the house tidy and pick up after him, etc. You know the drill! I've done a lot to be a better partner, and it's working. He tells me he loves me more, he tells me I'm gorgeous/beautiful/pretty, tells me I look amazing and my outfits look good, tells me how much he appreciates what I do and how I'm the perfect partner ('there is actually NOTHING wrong with you' were his words recently). I'm proud of how far we've come, but we are not making enough progress with our sex life and I don't quite know how to help it along.

Sometimes, he will just not be able to orgasm, and because of this he loses his boner. Sometimes he will have a 3 month streak of this not happening once, while this week we've had a three-time streak of it happening consecutively. The sex itself seems to have very little impact on it - who initiates, the position, the number of orgasms I have, no trends are visible to my knowledge. This has happened intermittently through our entire 4 year relationship, which I can appreciate - sometimes it just happens and I won't take it personally, but I always want to 'fix' it and avoid it happening again. I tried to talk to him about it last night which he was very reluctant to do, but he provided a helpful comment which was 'sometimes you just feel different and it doesn't do it for me'. Naturally, I broke out the kegel weights and started using it immediately to start toning my PC muscles again!

On top of this, lately he shows very little interest in having sex with me in general. I don't know how often he masturbates (my guess is once a week). He does not often approach me for sex (about once a week), often stops me mid-kiss or mid-embrace or mid-grope or even mid-blowjob, and won't meet my flirty remarks or suggestions. He also has zero interest in going down on me, and does not 'love' blowjobs while I absolutely love giving them, and love when he goes down on me. Honestly, I love when he is just generally sexual with me in any way. It's safe to say that I have a higher sexual appetite than him, at least lately.

It's important to mention that when we lived with my parents not too long ago (we lived with them for a year, and moved into our own place about 2 months ago), we'd have sex 3 times a week or more, I'd have him coming within 5 minutes, and he'd go down on me if I hadn't had an orgasm in that time or if he felt he owed me some extra attention. He also would always wake up with a morning boner (no longer does), and is no longer as kinky as he used to be (I won't go into specifics). But at this time, we also fought more often, we were worse people overall, and had overall a few 'issues' in general.

It's also important to mention he's specified that we need to seduce each other. I've tried this, albeit in a subtle way but I'm not quite confident enough to just strip for him and give him a lapdance quite yet. I wear beautiful lingerie, I regularly massage his shoulders, will randomly massage his crotch while lovingly staring into his eyes, I suggestively (and subtly) play with myself while he's watching, I approach him with blowjobs (to initiate sex, which he often stops me mid-way), I make flirty jokes, while I get very little from him. When we moved out together, I was hoping for sex in the living room, on the kitchen counter tops, in the shower, you name it. So far, nothing's really improved on that front, in fact, things have worsened for our sex life but improved vastly for our general relationship and personal connection.

My concern is that he is either bored with how 'perfect' our relationship is now, or that he's got a bit of a madonna-whore complex going on where perhaps I nurture him too much for him to view me in a sexual way. Am I too sexually aggressive, or not aggressive enough? Does anyone have any other thoughts? In terms of seduction, does anyone have some suggestions on what I can do to improve here by taking baby steps out of my comfort zone? I'm having trouble seeing this from a different point of view or seeing how I - and we - could work toward creating a better sex life. Any help would be greatly appreciated!