Three days ago I posted a somewhat cringe worthy account of my internalization of the red pill, here. Long story short: wife has been getting more vanilla in bed as of late, and I ended a session by saying, "you're boring me".

To clarify the situation, we've always been both sexually adventurous and supportive. I rarely ask for a BJ, but she's never denied me, so her refusal was a bit of a shock. Also, she hasn't been as excited so much lately, and it's something I've noticed and I have been thoughtful about. When the "you're boring me" statement was delivered, it was an honest statement and I didn't really give a shit about the outcome of it. The fact that she left to sleep in the spare bedroom because I didn't want mediocre sex was not my intention, though I did have a great sprawling sleep without her being there. The anger (next day) expressed in my post was not directed at her, but at myself; the fact that I've been getting complacent and it's starting to show.

So as I started writing my last post in the morning before she got up, yeah, I had some shit going through my head. Pre-MRP, I might have apologized. Instead, I just went along with my day.

The rest of the weekend I made sure to take care of my shit (yardwork, family time, exercise). Yesterday, I came home and did squats and then took the dog for a roller blade along the river path with the kids. BBQ'd some supper and played cards with the wife while we ate. Basically took care of my shit better than I have been lately.

I kind of expected to have sex last night (cuz' it had been a couple days), but if not, oh well. I was pleasantly surprised. Getting her clothes off was unusually easy, and I was then massaging her all over. I crawled onto her chest and she started sucking my cock. From there we moved into a 69 and she came buckets all over my face. It's been a long time since she's been that enthusiastic. Legs on my shoulders, doggy style, hair pulling...you get the point.

So today when I get home we are doing like the 20 second make out in the kitchen and she pulls back and says, "so am I still boring?" A part of me wanted to apologize to her, but instead I gave her this: "last night was anything but boring, babe!" She: "we gonna' do that again tonight?" Me, "guess we'll find out tonight" with a sly smile (of course we are).

My marital situation is not that far gone; actually pretty good compared to most.

But it's amazing how much your own headspace actions can affect another person. Things can go downhill without even appreciating the cause. Lesson learned: gotta stay on top of 'my shit' and be my own man.

I got my blow job. Still got work to do.