I am trying to figure out where I fit in this redpill world. I have read a lot of RP sidebar, NMMNG and MMSLP.

PHYSICAL: 6' 0". I weigh 264 (down from 270 around holidays), bodyfat around 28%. I have been doing some dumbbell lifting 5/7 mornings a week and yoga. I am mid 40s and balding. I have fairly broad shoulders and carry some weight well but am working on getting down to 240. counting calories for 1600 a day except for one weekend day when I go off the rails.

RELATIONSHIP: married 20 years, 6 yr old son. We have a good relationship but not the best. She really seems to dig sex even though we only usually do a couple of positions and then out. I like to say we usually do the deed when we are both awake and the kid is asleep, even though that doesn't happen as often as I would like (at least 1x per week, sometimes more). I have started working on RP principles and trying to "man up" by sitting at the head of the table and being more decisive, but it is taking some time.

CAREER: I had a mid-life crisis and went back to school. Just graduated and I am now preparing for a professional exam in February. I will have a full time gig once I get done at a place I have been part time at since 2015. I think they like me there and I have some related experience from my past career.

FINANCIAL: I have a 401(k) from my past career, so my focus is to really get back to earning again. Once I start getting regular checks, my/our goal is to pay off the student loans and home loan by 2025. I will be mid-50s and the kiddo will be looking at college by then. Wife makes good money right now, I have been a sort-of sugar baby for the last few years in school because I worked part-time and did a lot for school.

GOALS: I am looking forward to working full time again. I see two opportunities with the new position: either I can work there for a few years and move to something better paying or I could develop a position for myself at the firm where I could get a high level position.

I made a vision board for my life which has some plans for travel, a goal to buy a classic car, a new amplifier, home remodel, happy wife, happy child, and to be "Alpha AF."

I feel like my life has been a mixed bag: I have always been fairly competent and in my past career advanced well for a long time before it went pear-shaped with a new manager. I have also been fairly un-confident and dealt with depression/low confidence issues.

I would never consider myself an "Alpha," since that is reserved for the super-jock, business leader types. I was on the football team and started my senior year, but mostly out of hard work and not natural ability. I am really hoping to develop myself into someone who is totally relaxed with who I am, capable of having good conversations and making others feel good about themselves. I am really looking to live out the confidence I should have based on my accomplishments.

I am not looking to change my marriage hugely, but to increase the good stuff and minimize the bad. I want to teach my boy to grow up to be a man, in a John Wayne/Winston Churchill type mode, not an overgrown boy. I want him to learn responsibility and leadership and caring for others.

WHAT I SAW IN RP/WHY AM I HERE? I love the thought that it is okay to be a man, that it is needed and wanted. I am glad someone is explaining hypergamy, that people find their own level in the SMV. I like thinking that I can offer something good in the world other than just parroting approved ideas of others and driving a Prius.

We need to hear that it is ok to be rough, to be assertive in our desires. We need to know that our masculinity is not some left-behind appendage from caveman times that can only be used by warfighters and such, but that the innate tendencies and desires we have are for a reason.

TL/DR: Mostly beta dude who figures he must be at least 10% alpha since his wife is still down with fucking him and wants to build confidence and assertiveness. Do I have a place here?