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April 10, 2017

Married, 15y, 2 kids, both 46,I've made limited progress on the path over the past year. Still 7-12 pounds overweight and not lifting consistently. But, I dress better, I have lost 2 stones, I NEVER react - I used to argue back constantly. I think I out rank her SMV (I would say that).

Sat night: I initiated, she was suddenly tired and couldn't get away from me fast enough. We have sex once a week, she's too tired any days but weekend. This was a weekend without this duty sex - I stayed calm and didn't act butt hurt - but was awake all night with uncontrollable anger, my emotions are out of control. The temptation is to give up, just forget sex and intimacy altogether as the pursuit of it causes turmoil for me , but I have a MAP and need to throw myself at it like a rabid dog. - maybe monk mode. But, Jesus the anger, the anger - and I fuckjng meditate an hour day!

Any tips on controlling the anger very welcome.

Post Information
Title Anger
Author starrcarr
Upvotes 12
Comments 33
Date 10 April 2017 08:47 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
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MAPsexual market valuemonk modelift

[–]innominating6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lift consistently. It will relieve stress and simultaneously make you more attractive physically and hormonally, which will make her more likely to fuck you.

Also, track her cycle and initiate every day after her period before she ovulates. If you are attractive at all she definitely wants to fuck during the week that week.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

You are not passing Shit tests. So why are you angry that she won't fuck you ?

A lot of guys come on here still not understanding that you initiate when you want sex, not when she had told you that she is not too tired from the past. This perhaps is some of the most unattractive behavior. Period.

"It's the same olf Harry, just gets s hard on at 9pm Saturday night. We fuck. He comes. Gosh, he doesn't even try any other nights........".

Guess what ? She would make it a point to Fuck the man she dated and married if he Owned His Shit. And, decided to read and apply himself. As in 60 DoD.

Chicks make exceptions for alphas and excuses for angry covert betas. Get used to it. Initiate when you want. Lift. Read. Smile. Dress Be attractive and kill the anger.

[–]starrcarr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks man

[–]man_in_the_worldRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're angry because her rejection says that she thinks you suck as a man ... and because you believe that she's right.

Think about it. If you were an attractive, high value man with game, you wouldn't be deeply angered by her rejection, you would laugh at her naivety, or at most be slightly irritated and go out and pick up a ONS or look for an affair. Your anger comes from the fact that you know you don't have the quality to do so, and her rejection rubs your face in it.

Meditation won't help, because it just avoids the problem. The only fix is to improve yourself, which you're apparently too lazy to do. You're probably angry about that as well.

You know what you need to do. Go do it.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy


take this out of your post, read it back to yourself.

I think I out rank her SMV (I would say that).

Also, a fat chicks with blue hair can pull 6's. you don't decide your SMV, chicks do, and if 5's aren't initiating with you, then you ain't a 5.

[–]bob13bob0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Not true,. Tons of examples on here of husband's not getting sex while they could pull.much hotter pieces. Wives get complacent.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Could? As in theory, or they actually go do so?

A gun never fired is as impotent as no gun at all, so who would be concerned?

If these gyys are so able to slay, the question is, why do they put up with a frigid moneysink?

[–]bob13bob0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

don't argue for arguments sake. you know your statement was wrong.
it's not hard to tell that women will sleep with you. some of the men on here do sleep with hotter women then their wives. this whole sub is filled with men who love their wives and family, and all the advice and work trying to cure dead bedroom while it's so much easier to sleep with someone else.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Stick around. I used to agree, then I watch and listen to other men.

[–]weakandsensitive4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

didn't act butt hurt

you and every other joe chumpass claims this. you and every other joe chumpass are lying to yourself.

The temptation is to give up,

This isn't a temptation to give up. It's your own fucking failure to adopt any principles slapping you in the face. Outcome independent behavior my fucking ass.

Any tips on controlling the anger very welcome.

Yeah. It's really easy. Stop being a faggot and anger wouldn't be an issue. To get to that point takes actual work and introspection.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Force yourself to confront your anger as your issue not hers. Why are you angry, really? Because she said no to having sex with you or because you want to have sex and you have led your marriage to this sexless place? The anger you feel is really anger at yourself and your pathetic leadership. Fix yourself first. You say you are overweight. Get in shape, stop eating garbage. You say you are not lifting consistently. Stop being a pussy, lift minimum three times a week no matter what. Where are you at on your sidebar reading? Until you complete it you should be STFU Monk Mode and you know it.

[–]starrcarr0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Agreed I need monk mode. My only issue with lifting is that I have a fucked knee - can you make a difference on machines alone?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Yes absolutely. You should talk to a doctor about your knee and what you can do for lower body exercises, but your knee will not prohibit you from doing upper body horizontal work: Bench Press, Inverted Row, Bench Curl. Those three movements alone and their variations will build your chest, shoulders, arms, and back. Even if your knee prevents you from min/maxxing your training through full body barbell workouts with squats and deadlifts in the mix, you can still make major improvements to your physique. Do not let your knee be an excuse to be out of shape. Age either, I have heard from too many 40+ guys that they are too old to care. What a fucking pussy attitude. An alpha male always strives to maintain the highest level of SMV his age allows.

[–]BobbyPeru0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I have heard from too many 40+ guys that they are too old to care. What a fucking pussy attitude. An alpha male always strives to maintain the highest level of SMV his age allows.

Truth. 48 here and in the best shape of my life. Literally.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You're old.

[–]BobbyPeru0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes by societal standards

[–]TexasThomas2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

screw the meditation....go run. I do wind sprints with intermittent walking. get that heart rate up for at least 30-40 mins a few times a week. I don't have anger problems but I do have anxiety issues and if I don't run I start getting overwhelmed with things that are out of my control. Lifting weights helps too....take your anger out in the gym.

And here is my personal view on why wives don't happily have sex with their husbands. Not saying this applies to you, but you can take it for what it's worth: A wife who avoids having sex with her husband, or does so intermittently due to "duty" does not respect her husband. In order for a husband to command respect from his wife, there must be love, there must be a leadership,and there must be at least a mild intimidation factor. A little bit of arrogance thrown in doesn't hurt either. The point is, she needs to know who the boss is, that the boss has an edge over her, and that he might come unhinged if her behavior is bad or if she isn't holding up her end of the bargain. But here's the kicker.....if my wife doesn't respect me, it's not her fault, it's my fault. I dropped the ball somewhere, and allowed her to have no respect for me....I allowed myself to become to nice, too compliant, too beta, too much of a fag that she now sees me as some sort of co-wife. Wives don't want to screw a co-wife...that's a revolting thought; but they do fantasize over screwing a man who makes them weak in the knees, who's just a little intimidating and who has a power and an edge over them. In short, I would try to increase the male/female polarity. By increasing your masculinity you will naturally increase the sexual polarity between the two of you and your wife will naturally be drawn to you. This of course does not mean to be an ass; it just means to rise up and be above her.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Still 7-12 pounds overweight and not lifting consistently. But...

But but but. Hamster hamster hamster. Excuse excuse excuse.

[–]TheThirdT1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you meditate, the you should be very aware of the transience of feeling and emotions. When I get angry, I try to immediately notice/feel my anger and remind myself that it will pass. Then I ask myself why am I angry. This question usually allows me to uncover the convert contract or unrealistic expectation which speeds up my acceptance of reality and gives me something to work on in the future.

[–]starrcarr1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks again - back to the map

[–]cabanaboy461 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What ive found running my map, and just with women in general, is they can pick up on your subconscious vibes. If you are pissed after a rejection (and we've all been there) then she is picking up on that subconscious lack of OI.

What worked for me earlier in my map was changing my frame of mind to be "im gonna initiate and i accept that she is gonna reject me. But by doing so, im building the expectation with her that i want sex". Then when i got the lame ass excuse i would just smile and say ok and then go to bed or go do something else. I was still faking it, but prepping my frame and expextations before hand really helped manage my immediate reaction and the emotional reaction.

It feels a lot different to get rejected when you think its a building block to your future relationship and future frame

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why are we in the Lotus position for an hour ? Why are we work for stasis for an hour ?

If we redefine breathing technique to shut down sections of the mind or the mind to go into a sleep, why are we not using it to seek tranquility ?

You cannot use meditation to control the anger. The anger is anger. You are not the anger. The anger is a direct response to your behavior in situations that you wish to control. You cannot control desire, tingles or attraction. Therefore, anger controls your thoughts.

As we enter an area to enter and embrace statis, remember we can only control our own actions, and we execute the actions for benefit to ourselves altruistic benifits. Feed a child/feed yourself. Covert contracts are executed actions with absolutely no benefit. This drives anger

[–]Aaren_Augustine0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What's your opinion on Rollo's Reconstruction IV?

Meditation isn't a very preventative medication

[–]starrcarr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hadn't read it. Have now. That's mind blowing

[–]The_LitzRed Beret0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

You are still waiting for a high five from her, which is not going to happen bud.

If your dread level is not at level 5 why not?

[–]starrcarr0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks to you all _ I needed this

[–]The_LitzRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Kickstart yourself with 60 DoD, forget about the past and focus on what is ahead of you.

[–]thunderbeyond0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm only new at mrp, but I know what you mean. Yeah its easy to feel angry when you don't get what you want. Outcome Independence - she doesn't want to fuck, you shouldn't give a fuck. Use that energy in another way and head off to the gym. Turn the energy into muscle. If she sees you getting angry she knows she has power over you.

[–]BrazilRedPill0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your wife is still intoxicated by your previous bluepill actions. She isn't going to forget what you did in the past as fast as you would like it.

You can only keep your RP actions, and eventually she will buy that this is what she can really expect from you from now on.

If you are now a valuable man, and if this relationship was new, it would be a piece of cake for you. But dude, after 15 years of your bluepill shit, how can she believe that you are a new man in a year?

Keep lifting, and start some dread. Don't rush things, follow bluepill professor's timeline.

And keep in mind that you can only fix yourself; your wife's decision of jumping in your boat is totally hers. If it doesn't work, you will find out that there's an awesome life after marriage for a high valuable man.

[–]RBuddDwyerRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Try reading up on Albert Ellis and REBT. If you are a Career Beta, then you probably have a lot of shitty internal programming, usually something that ultimately leads to you thinking you are entitled to sex for some reason or another. It might not be obvious, but it is there if you really look for it. Fix that, and the anger should subside.

Now, fixing that is the big thing. You have a lot of reading to do. Start with NMMNG, and then move on to A Guide to Rational Living by Albert Ellis.

[–]resolutions3160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

In my experience - and this has only been my experience - it was better to move through the anger, accepting it and releasing it, rather than trying to "control" it or "get over it."

[–]sh0ckley0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Mediation didn't do much for my anger. Lift.

Anger is not controlled. It's released... into iron.

You're missing something and slacking off somewhere. What dread level are you at?

I'm no MRP poster child but at almost a year in, I have had massive gains that seem to be absent for you.

Be attractive. Don't be unattractive.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you believe that you are entitled, if you also believe that she is judging you poorly..... you will get angry. If it is bad, it becomes rage.

Rage is the anti-fuck; always unattractive and self destructive. Rage is your mind turning against you and making sure that you do not get what you want.

Look underneath the rage, honestly, and determine the real cause. Then you can fix your problems that cause your rage.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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