Negotiating for affection

Wolfssenger · 2019-02-22T21:16:03+00:00

Giving up easy sex/servitude/submission. It's a bit common wth lost souls here. Sex and affirmation of worth (submission/servitude) are the most valuable things you can provide, as the fruits of competency (often measured, perhaps erroneously by wealth) and protection are the most valuable things a man can provide.

Either party giving up their valuables with no guarantee of return is in a desperate situation.

WillDonJay · 2019-02-22T23:33:54+00:00

Trying to manipulate affirmation out of him.

Your average worthwhile guy will do all sorts of things to show a girl he cares about her. But because he might not be expressing that fact in a particular way that she wants...

She may insult herself hoping that he'll reassure her with compliments. (Self Deprecation)
She may make unfavourable comparisons of him to other men. ("Tanya's boyfriend got her flowers last week. How come you never get me flowers?")
She may withhold affection or tasks that she usually handles or even effort into her appearance to try to get him to notice something is wrong.
She may make passive aggressive comments. ("Nevermind, I'll just figure it out myself.")
Similarly, she may rebuff his initial queries of concern ("Is everything alright?" // "I'm fine.") because she wants him to try harder to help her as the effort she's forcing him to exert makes her feel validated. Cue her getting extra upset at him if he believes her and doesn't push past her initial refusal.
She may introduce something new without telling him, (Hair, makeup, clothes, etc.) hoping he'll notice and shower her with affection. Cue resentment if he doesn't. ("You don't care about me.") *She may sulk when she wants his attention.

This is all standard Blue Pill fare. You know what your Captain wants instead of all of these things? Besides not disrespecting him like that, for you to be direct and just tell him what you want. "Hey, I need to vent. Do you have some time to listen for a bit?" // "I don't feel confident today. Can you remind me why you love me?" // "I really want to spend some time with you. Lets go to _____ on Friday." Just talk to him. Communicate. Don't make him guess your needs. An employee wouldn't get away with pulling that shit on her manager, don't make your Captain expect less then that bare minimum of his partner.

A worthwhile man will be working hard to provide and protect and to lead. Recognize what he's already doing and help him meet your other needs. Enable him! Don't be throwing sticks into his spokes. If you succeed in undermining him to get affection you will be unconsciously losing attraction and respect for him, then wondering why the man you've been sabotaging isn't the Captain you dreamed of.

MissNietzsche · 2019-02-22T21:11:09+00:00

Using sex as a bargaining chip is a big no-no. RPW should spoil their husbands with sex; negotiating with it is a sign of disrespect, and, like you said, un-attraction.

I know you basically used the converse of this as the premise for this thread, but I still think it should be said regardless, as it is such a huge one.

HB3234 · 2019-02-23T06:12:25+00:00

I see a lot of the common ones have been addressed: offering sex and "wifey" domestic benefits without commitment or marriage (respectively). Another I'd like to chime in with is accepting bad behavior. Women with low self esteem sometimes let bad behavior slide, hoping to win points as the "chill" or "low maintenance" gf.

Whisper · 2019-02-22T22:58:43+00:00

"The talk" ... she is negotiating for commitment.

Using sex as a bargaining chip (either withholding or offering).

organicsunshine · 2019-02-22T23:15:12+00:00

Too much too soon. If you just meet a guy and he sends you flowers or a gift it's weird. Over investing without reciprocation is a sign of desperation.

Runmeoverthanks · 2019-02-22T23:09:30+00:00

Using sex, emotional coddling, other feminine things to coerce men into proposing and marrying. Women are the gatekeepers of sex and men are the gatekeepers of relationships

Title	Negotiating for affection
Author	bchlladyfrog
Upvotes	22
Comments	24
Date	February 22, 2019 8:37 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/atmhzt/negotiating_for_affection/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/negotiating-for-affection.219554 https://theredarchive.com/post/219554

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