Did any of you found the "unicorn" yet? Question about wifing my ltr

mrpthrowa · 2019-04-22T13:47:04+00:00

Keep your guard up always and be the stoic father figure. She will love you for it.

Invariably, I find that a strong father figure makes things much easier with girls. They know what to expect from strong men.

The girls without a strong father figure are almost always fucked up in some certain ways.

Kommanderdude · 2019-04-22T13:27:13+00:00

First. She’s isn’t a unicorn. Awalt applies to all women. She is just as capable of cheating as any other girl. That doesn’t mean she will. Not all girls cheat.

With that said. Based on what you have stated and without me actually knowing her personally. I’d say she sounds like a solid choice if procreation is part of what you want in your life. Remember you shouldn’t feel lucky to have her. She should feel happy that a man like you with options chose her. Remember you are the prize.

[deleted] · 2019-04-22T13:31:41+00:00

From what I read, thumbs up from me. Just don't let your guard down nor let your life revolve around her.

xx-Rain_Maker-xx · 2019-04-22T13:56:44+00:00

Marry if and only if she is head over hills for you. It gets really hard if you enter marriage in equal conditions. By the way, if she has 2 masters degrees, there is a good chance she quit her PhD. That 's a very humbling experience, so she pretty much should empathize with you on your college situation and I wouldn't worry too much about it.

cafeitalia · 2019-04-22T14:32:13+00:00

Do not run a business with your wife. That is all I would say.

FieldLine · 2019-04-22T16:49:40+00:00

Ive read alot of you are suggesting never to get married.

When you recite your vows is the precise moment you willingly surrender all power in the relationship. You are simply trusting her to keep behaving, and if you ever decide you want out she is entitled by law to half of your shit (and your kids).

Furthermore, while I have not observed it personally, there is no shortage of men reporting their wives to be less attracted to them without the build in "dread" of potentially being dumped, leading to a dead bedroom situation.

What do you have to gain from marrying her? That's the only question that really matters here.

someday i want to get married and have kids, and this one seems like best option i came across.

Procreation is the only reason to consider committing to one woman on the legal level. I can't comment on that, however, since I have no innate desire to have children.

mrpthrowa · 2019-04-22T13:53:42+00:00

I was talking to this girl today who posts nudes on Reddit, and is quite famous in our corner of the world for it. She was telling me why she had to remove all her pictures recently and basically put her account on lockdown mode (NOT deleted). It's because she recently got a boyfriend, and had been posting for 4 months, wanted to post pictures with him, but didn't want him to know that she'd been doing this, at a very high level and frequently btw. So she tells him she's heard of this practice and would he be interested in posting on a gonewild subreddit. He says yes.

Now, in his mind she's a girl who come across something and is being naughty, and she's working damn hard to make sure he never finds out and is lying to him.

You don't know what you don't know.

Have kids. In fact based on what you're saying you should marry this girl just for the family connections. But keep it an open marriage on your end.

Onein1024th · 2019-04-22T15:59:41+00:00

the toolbox of TheRedPill can be used to build whatever you design to. If you design to get married and have a family; don't let us stop you from getting what you want. Your description of her makes her sound like a good candidate for marriage.

But there are some harsh realities with marriage. IF you want to do this, go into it fully prepared with your eyes wide open.

Getting married is definitely TRP on hard mode. To keep your relationship value you will have to continue to get more fit, more successful in your restaurant business, continue to have an active social life, and continue to lead her. My advice, read the ENTIRE MarriedRedPill subreddit sidebar and bluepillprofessor's 12 steps of dread to understand what kind of game you're entering into with marriage.

Source: I didn't find The Red Pill until after I had a kid. In hindsight, I would have done a lot of things differently. Here's a list, for what it's worth:

choosing a less bossy woman as a wife, or shaping her into one before considering engagement
I would have picked out the ring on my own
I would have kept the same social schedule I had before marriage
I would have kept going to the gym
I would have laughed at her petty demands instead of taking them seriously
I would have bought that motorcycle
I would have stayed in control of my own finances; at least keeping one non-joint bank account
Less failed shit tests, general beta attitude, etc.
I would've owned my shit around the house better
I would've made her get a full time job ASAP, or dictated a spending budget that fell within HER modest means; not defaulting to one that consumed most of my income.
I would have continued to have friendships with attractive women for social proof / passive dread
I would have kept up my flirty demeanor
I would NOT have moved to another state right after the wedding, where I had no social proof
I would have joined that band she told me not to
I would have taken that ski trip with the guys

T-P-T-W-P · 2019-04-22T16:58:09+00:00

I mean you have to give up to get right? She sounds like a good option if you are interested in getting married and having children. In a perfect world I would not ever do this, but eventually procreating under good circumstances is important to me so I will likely have to take the plunge eventually. RP theory should be the secondary set of values you draw from. The first should be how you feel and what you ultimately want in life. This is often forgotten on this sub because so many come here with no direction, value, goals, etc. You seemingly don’t have that issue. I’m 23 now and I’ve gradually locked in the mindset of being my version of an alpha and not really giving a fuck. I don’t feel the need to act the way this sub would likely indicate to 100% of the time because that would essentially be acting like a sheep rather than the leader of my own reality. Take what you want from here, leave what you don’t. Maybe list some pros and cons with big decisions like this just for your own understanding but leading and working for the life you genuinely want is what will likely lead to the optimal payoff.

escapethesolarsystem · 2019-04-22T18:20:48+00:00

As other have said, there are no "unicorns" and that mentality can get you into trouble; with that caveat, some women are much better wife prospects than others, and it sounds like she might be.

However you guys are running a business together, and your income is dependent a lot on her family and her. Also, she's better educated than you, so I would ask this: does she respect you? Are you "the boss" in the business? Does she follow the decisions you make without causing a lot of problems? Your authority in the relationship and place as a man seems a bit precarious so it's important that she is clear she can't walk all over you. When you have children, you don't want to be competing / fighting with her over how to raise them.

Since English is not your native language, what country are you in? (Also, none of us can see English speaking natives can see English is not your native language, you write quite normally.) How's the legal environment around marriage in your country? If it's good, and you do want kids, then you might be ok to go ahead and wife her. Don't have kids with a women that isn't your wife.

tefllifestyle · 2019-04-22T19:34:00+00:00

Have u check her myers briggs type?

lawrencep93 · 2019-04-22T13:54:35+00:00

No one is perfect but after many years of dating and deep diving into MGTOW, female behavior and psychology I finally found my unicorn.

filthykarmawhore69 · 2019-04-22T18:11:21+00:00

The weird feudal approach to LTRs here is like taking antidepressants: kills the lows but also the highs.

How does this girl make you feel? You sound entirely neutral about her and are sizing her up the way one would a horse at market.

If your ideal is the kind of boring relationship your grandpa had (not mine, he’s been a cheeky bastard long before it was socially acceptable and shagged anything that moves from 1950 on - seems to have done well enough), then sure go for it.

I’ve tried being with the girls under my control and it’s boring. I’d rather ride a wild mustang than a reliable draught horse.

ChadTheWaiter100 · 2019-04-22T13:49:57+00:00

She sounds pretty nice. No one is perfect. But the fact that you’d rate her as a 7 and then say you’re good looking, indicating that she could potentially be beneath you in terms of look, sounds good. That’s good bc when you date a women a few notches beneath you she’s always down to slob you and just always try to please you in general.

furcryingoutloud · 2019-04-22T14:07:38+00:00

amazing relationship with her father, also very high value family in the local comunity, and quite rich

Go for it dude.

golgynat0r · 2019-04-22T16:36:11+00:00

Go for it. Do a prenup agreement also and remember that you'll be going hardmode after that.

Good Luck.

DubbleFUPAwitCheez · 2019-04-22T17:22:43+00:00

You own a restaurant with her? You're already in up to your neck with this broad. Might as well go through with it and marry her. If things go south you're pretty fucked anyway regardless of being married. I'm not a total hater on marriage like some of the guys around here but I recognize that's it a bum deal for men in general but there are still some out there worth marrying and this seems to be one of them.

The only slight red flag I see is her broaching the subject of marriage herself. A girl that loves you so much that she won't risk rocking the boat by putting labels on your relationship IMO is the one that deserve it the most.

Nergaal · 2019-04-22T16:31:56+00:00

AWALT means all women CAN do that, not that they will surely do that.

has only one female friend and 2 guys as friends both I know of and hang out with them also n count is 3.

This is kinda a red flag. She might hate gossip, but more male friends than female ones is not really that good.

You should check out /r/marriedredpill

JTPish · 2019-04-22T19:04:31+00:00

I consider myself a high value man, and many of my peers would agree. I have dated scores of women, and have found only ibexes... No unicorns. They appear wonderful at first, but there is always a personality change or skeleton hiding in the closet, just waiting to rear its head during a stressful time. Sometimes it's not a big deal. Other times, it's something for which I have gone no contact immediately. I have never come across a woman in dating who I truly find to be my "equal" if you are going to factor morality, ethics, intellect, drive, passion, etc. Most of the time they are hot and boring, hot and lazy, driven and homely, or driven, intelligent, hot, and completely untrustworthy. Or my personal favorite (/s): driven, hot, intelligent, with a drug problem.

That being said, I agree with the other commenters. She sounds like a winner however you measure it, and as long as she is supportive of you, you should be supportive of her. It would be a mutually beneficial partnership...but never show your full hand. You must always have a backup plan, escape hatch, etc. No one is completely trustworthy.

Elihad15 · 2019-04-22T19:07:58+00:00

I think it would be in your best longterm interest to do it. You seem to have a good grasp of the dynamics between men and women that make relationships work. The only question is do you want kids? Because at the end of the day we only have one option for that and your option is better than most.

LilLoserFreny · 2019-04-22T20:47:16+00:00

Unicorns don’t exist.

taway83455 · 2019-04-22T20:56:33+00:00

Unicorn is a bit of a misleading or at least imprecise term. As used most frequently, it just means non-American/Americanized. Lots of unicorns out there who were brought up under different cultures.

But introverted and off social media helps for American chicks.

Ryabemo · 2019-04-22T21:22:45+00:00

No happy man is a married man.

Malakyas_ · 2019-04-22T21:46:05+00:00

just marry her and give her a kid. Keep lifting and being Alpha. GL HF

Vern119 · 2019-04-22T22:21:04+00:00

Your ltr sounds like mine did a long time ago. 7, but nerdy. Smart, but naive. Naïveté in a girl is not a bad thing. Much rather have a girl who is naive than one who is cunning and will eventually fuck you over. Very reliable and honest. Anyway, we dated for 3.5 years and I eventually proposed. But between the proposal and before the marriage I had her sign a prenup. This is fucking key and will keep your dread game strong. Quality girls shouldn’t flinch at a prenup if their intentions are pure. Anyway, we have a very solid marriage and very happy now 12 years later and with a kid as well. That mean we didn’t have struggles along the way. Everyone does. If you want kids and a family and a life together with this girl, wife her and make her sign a prenup. If you don’t want kids, or you’re even the least bit sure you don’t want to spend the rest of your life with her, then delay as long as possible and then let her go when she gives you the ultimatum.

There are a few gems out there. Mine was 19 and a virgin when we first started dating. At the time, I almost refused to hook up with virgins, but I’m glad I did because the lower a woman’s n-count, the more likely you’re going to wind up in a happy marriage.

Stefan Molyneux does a presentation on this and it’s so fucking eye-opening. Guys, if you have a girl with an n-count over 2 or 3, I would strongly consider plating and not marrying. I like this guy because, like TRP, he’s not afraid to state facts even though they’re very politically incorrect.

https://youtu.be/um3EmS9DKsI

Back to your original question, most of the girls I see in modern day I wouldn’t fucking dream of wifing or even being in a ltr. I’ve been a complete asshole to my wife and she’s somehow still with me. I guess I went red pill before I knew what the fuck that was after having my heart broken by a girl who cheated on me and I was doing everything women say they want. After that I had a healthy distrust of all women and generally treated them like shit. It’s weird, I thought they would end up leaving, but it only draws them closer. To emphasize what other guys on here have said, don’t put up with bullshit, ever. And if she fucks up, make her take responsibility and apologize. Every time. If this hasn’t already been the norm in your relationship, do not propose.

Happily with the same woman going on 16 years total (12 years married).

IV-IVm-I · 2019-04-22T22:35:29+00:00

it's your life, boss.

[deleted] · 2019-04-22T22:40:58+00:00

That's not a unicorn. That's a snow leopard and yes I have one.

Unicorn has it's own specific meaning online. A unicorn is a single partner that agrees to have sexual relations with a couple without intending to start any sort of relationship with either of them outside of having sex.

It is a mythical thing because it is an utterly shitty and draining position to be in and is typically if not exclusively a position held by women.

I doubt a cuckhold's bull has the same experience at all. "Yeah Jimmy, I'll come over and bang your wife, how does 8 sound? Dinner first? sure I'll see you around 7!"

--------------------------

As to your question and details

Too early for kids, you should take her out with you into the world and have some great life experiences together. Kids would be better in your early 30s. You have bad grammar but you seem like a great dude with a good woman. Hopefully it works out.

I think the major issue with a relationship, is it changes when you have children, typically for the worst. Having a child is terrible, expensive, and back breaking work. You put that shit on top of the life you already have, and the chances of it breaking into crappy little pieces skyrockets.

You have no fucking idea how to raise a child and neither does she, even if she raised her siblings from a young age, it's different when it's yours. It's different when you can't give them back, they are a relentless point of responsibility and anxiety for the rest of both of your lives.

I wouldn't do it lightly, or without a hefty 30-70k extra set aside specifically for the child's needs in the first few years.

Seriously difficult thing for relationships to survive these days. Push it out and enjoy not having a child when you visit places all over the world. Have a child when you are ready to grind out 18 years of being home when you'd rather be somewhere else.

pishposh44 · 2019-04-22T23:33:54+00:00

You sound so boring the only reason she would stay is through manipulating her and making her feel insecure... which it sounds like you already know with the games you play.

When someone who is fun and actually cares to create happiness comes around you are done.

chaconuts · 2019-04-23T00:35:02+00:00

I understand why you're asking for advice. However, at the end of the day, shouldn't trp be about doing what you want, when you want, with who you want? You've read the side bar, You don't need our advice. Truly embrace trp and live your life. If that's marriage- do it, if that's multiple women- do it. You don't need our opinion man. Be confident in yourself and what you've learned here. Dont live your life based on the opinions of internet strangers. Live the way you want to.

Thinkingard · 2019-04-23T00:35:05+00:00

She sounds about as good as they come, I guess. Her N count is 3, you say, but as Roosh says, no man can ever know the real number, but it's probably more like 5. Not too bad, but not great. Sounds like she has two beta orbiters you have to deal with. The strong relationship with her father is good, but how closely have you examined it? What kind of man is her father? How much of her history do you know? The social awkwardness might mean her bang count is closer to 3, but if she's still socially awkward even after being with you 3 years then I would throw out what I just said. The fact she has no IG acct or social media is really good. Does she dress slutty? How much attention does she crave? Ofc she wants your babies, she is hitting her wall soon and wants to settle down with you, it's normal.

But OP, are you done scoring with women? Are you ready to never have sex with anyone else ever again? Bc if not, then don't marry, you're not ready yet. If you are contemplating marrying just because you think this girl won't screw you over then you shouldn't marry because she will eventually disappoint you and screw you over. You said you've had to use dread game on her. Why? Also, why do you want to get married? Is she on anti-depressants? Remember that you can never lose frame for the rest of your life. You will always have to game her like she's a short term girlfriend. Does she follow your lead or are you equal partners? How involved is her family?

Tons of girls approaching the wall seem really good. She doesn't have a lot of red flags but there's obviously more to this because you are hesitant enough to ask all of us. Also, if you decide to not marry her, break up with her right away because her biological clock is ticking and she doesn't have time to waste and she might not be a bad wife (for 7 years at least) for someone who is ready to marry. Is she religious? Does she have an ideology that will help keep her in check? Because ultimately you cannot control her. Does she agree with abortion? Does she agree with feminist ideas? Those are red flags you need to consider. You need to think about what ideas drive her thinking because that is how she will function down the road.

Nis_law · 2019-04-23T00:42:19+00:00

She is from a small town and her N count is 3?

If i was serious about a girl I would look into how many serious relationships she has had before. Small town means everyone knows everyone. Why not check her history a bit? Why did she break up with her previous bfs? All sorts of questions come in mind.

Try to be discreet about it. I mean I wouldnt care about my gf history even if she was LTR but this is marriage we're talking about. Data shows that if a woman has more than 2 sexual partners she is inclined to be discontent with marriage and more likely to divorce. Check her history and her family health history.

[deleted] · 2019-04-23T00:49:54+00:00

I don't like marriage but if you are happy then stay with her

IV-IVm-I · 2019-04-23T01:14:03+00:00

ask yourself “what’s in it for me.” What’s the answer look like?

Velebit · 2019-04-23T01:25:31+00:00

She sounds like high functioning aspergers. This is similar type of woman Varg has married. These women have different hypergamy. They value a man who can challenge them intellectually rather then act as a shiny status symbol to brag to her friends. In general it seems a better choice then most women.

Give her an online autism test it will show you how much her own nature differs from typical women.

adeptintact · 2019-04-23T05:38:34+00:00

Your post sounds like you're trying to convince us to advise you to marry her. The reality is she's a 7 and you haven't pulled the trigger because you know deep down you don't want to marry her. You will know in your gut who is the right person to bite the bullet and propose to and it's not her.

andymgtow · 2019-04-22T16:14:10+00:00

What is your n count?

TheStumblingWolf · 2019-04-22T14:47:23+00:00

There are no unicorns. There are bundles of meat with certain traits that may or may not blend well together.

[deleted] · 2019-04-22T18:08:34+00:00

Tl;dr once you get married she will slowly develop contempt and resentment for you due to being too predictable and stable.

Houston2NYC · 2019-04-22T19:36:30+00:00

You should soft next her. Think with an abundance attitude.

[deleted] · 2019-04-22T21:51:47+00:00

DO NOT MARRY. You will regret it 100% of the time. I don't care how perfect she seems right now, shit WILL change for the worst. At best, offer her a civil union or some other form of "matrimony" that doesn't shackle you down. Or perhaps just a religious ceremony without the legal hand-over of testicles. Personally, if I ever find a Catholic girl, I will get a Catholic wedding with all of the bells and whistles BUT I WILL NOT SIGN ANY FUCKING PAPERS.

As for kids, well, that's up to whether you want to procreate or not, but don't get attached to them because the woman WILL USE THE KIDS AGAINST YOU and you don't want to suffer if they get taken away by big men with badges and guns. Shitty time we live in bro, but at least you were lucky to find a good girl.

Popeman79 · 2019-04-22T14:01:07+00:00

I found a unicorn. Most gorgeous girl I've ever laid my eyes upon, great and caring heart, absolutely trustworthy (I've tested her for years), and will be a great mom when we have kids.

Yet I'm never marrying her, and she knows it.

Why would you marry? You have nothing to gain (or very little) and so much to lose. Even your perfect girl, once the going gets tough, will have friends telling her to divorce you and get the money and easy life, and it maybe will be the little incentive that will destroy your otherwise healthy relationship.

I'd say, if you love her and want it to last: don't marry. Remain in control always.

Title	Did any of you found the "unicorn" yet? Question about wifing my ltr
Author	tinmarFF
Upvotes	72
Comments	79
Date	April 22, 2019 1:19 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/bg20y6/did_any_of_you_found_the_unicorn_yet_question/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/did-any-of-you-found-the-unicorn-yet-question.235720 https://theredarchive.com/post/235720

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