Emasculated, Exasperated

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November 26, 2019
98 upvotes

I need some words from those of you who have been here.

Almost a month and a half ago I was cheated on. I'm having a hard fucking time with it.

This is not a case of one-itis; I'm thankful she's gone. I have read the sidebar. I know what I should do. I know how to think about this which would be best for me: abundance mentality, not mine just my turn, focus on myself...

But dudes... fuck me do I feel small. I spent 6 years building up a solid-ass relationship with a great girl. She moved across the country to live with me. I know for a fact that I am the best thing that has ever happened to her. We decided to give up alcohol for a month, and on the 25th day I went to a football game with my family, stayed sober the whole time. She went out and got drunk with her boss and fucked him. And I know that she loved it. And I know that she did not give a thought to me.

I have been lifting every day since this happened (I used to compete in powerlifting so this is not new). I have been working my ass off in my career. I have been reading (even reread rational male). I have been spending time with other friends. I have been spending time with family. I gave up caffeine. I have been doing things I love, like hunting and backpacking and a Spartan race.

But when it's just me and my thoughts, I sit the fuck down.

And I can't get back up, boys. It's so personal. I know that it's not. But you know that it is.

I'd like to hear from some folks who have been through it. I can't think my way out. I can't write my way out. I can't read my way out. I can't physically beat it out of me.

What did it take?


Post Information
Title Emasculated, Exasperated
Author INAPICTTAA
Upvotes 98
Comments 147
Date 26 November 2019 12:51 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/296654
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/e1q02n/emasculated_exasperated/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
abundancecheatingliftgame
Comments

[–]vondoom900103 points104 points  (5 children) | Copy

This is natural. Its just the way our brains are hooked up - the areas of the brain that light up during this time are those that light up in a drug addicts head. You think of the ' good times ' instead of the bs also. ' literally what a smackhead thinks about during withdrawal'.

So let's unhook your brain from this bs.

1# concentrate on the bad times. The anger here can be valuable fuel if channelled correctly - trust me I got in absolute iron man shape after one long term relationship.

2# She wasnt 1 in a billion she was 1 of a billion. There's plenty of better women out there.

3# you were the reason you had fun not her. You seem to forget that. Once you regain abundance this will be as clear as day.

Shit takes time but once you heal up it's like your minds callused to it. Spartan proof.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 17 points18 points  (3 children) | Copy

Thanks, this is helpful. Definitely easy to forget that it wasn't all great and that when it was, it was because I helped to make it that way. I like #3.

[–]faultywalnut20 points21 points  (1 child) | Copy

Go back and read your post and realize what a badass you are. You’re a freaking catch, my dude. She was lucky to have you and other girls will he lining up to take her place.

[–]Ill_mumble_that9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

other girls will be lining up to take her place.

They already were. Always be approaching. It doesn't matter if you are in a LTR or not. But especially if you are in a LTR.

Think guys will wait to hit on your girlfriend? In the OP her boss sure didn't wait. If she is attractive then other men will always be approaching your girl, you should always be approaching other girls.

This gives her a healthy and true sense of dread. The kind of dread that most women never ever have to deal with because they are dating beta chumps that put them on a pedestal.

Women will only truly value you when they feel such dread. This also requires consistently maintaining and increasing your SMV.

Also, LTR are shitty unless you want kids. You can have the same intimacy with long time plates.

[–]babybopp11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Awalt is real dude. There are no if’s ands and buts.

[–]2319Skew2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm obviously not OP but I really like this list. Thanks.

[–]somejerseydude37 points38 points  (1 child) | Copy

Your head is on straight...be thankful for that.

Your back on your mission, lifting, spending time with family/the boys, and aren’t taking responsibility for what happened because it wasn’t your fault.

Healing takes time and any non-LARPer here will tell you that.

You’ll get your mojo back soon enough.

If you’re ready, hop on tinder and talk to women, it’s a low effort way to get some cheap validation and show yourself that you’re still the prize.

You’ll be over this thot in no time boyo.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks. Tinder was a lot of fun in school, maybe I'll give it another go.

[–]mr-satan22 points23 points  (12 children) | Copy

Let me ask you something... what do you really miss about her? What did she bring to the table that is actually irreplaceable?

Answer: nothing.

That’s what helps me out on these types of situations. I realize woman truly don’t bring anything to the table that the next girl doesn’t.

The bitch that’s works at McDonalds pussy isn’t different than Halle Berrys.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 16 points17 points  (8 children) | Copy

It's not that I miss her. It's that I am shook by how shook I am from being cheated on. Took away all my control. I like the Halle Berry analogy though lol.

[–]i-am-the-prize12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

Very meta

But like Inception- you’ve already gone deeper- and you’re analyzing it and learning - so you’ve already beat this.

You’ve experienced one of the worst feelings anyone can feel. So know that when (not IF) you make it past this the rest is easy.

[–]jerrymcguiver6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

It was always out of your control. You've lost nothing, only returned what wasn't yours.

If a coworkers gf cheated on him. You might think "shit happens". Then if your gf cheats, don't think "why me" but instead "shit happens". Detach yourself, it's only your opinion that is troubling, not the event itself.

"Let death and exile, and everything that is terrible appear before your eyes everyday, especially death; and you will never have anything contemptible in your thoughts or crave anything excessively."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Cool quote...who said it?

[–]mr-satan3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yep, totally understandable. Your ego took a hit. Every single person would feel the same way.

Really explore what I'm trying to say though. Your ex didn't bring anything to the table that was "one-of-a-kind". What did she reallllllly do that was something another bitch couldnt? Nothing!

She isn't lovable, she's *leaveable*.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I sat back and thought about this and most of you is right. My only counter to your point would be the time we shared. The one thing she had which was one-of-a-kind, which no one else currently has, is a little bit of me. We came together in a lot of ways through that time. She herself is "leavable" and replaceable, but she herself literally WAS me, a little bit. So, that part of me goes with her.

Just playing devils advocate here, important to note that I'm not hung up on her, just working through the ego hit.

[–]mr-satan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Appreciate those good memories you had with her, back when she wasn’t a funky bitch.

You can use those good experiences as your new “bar” for what you want your next women to be at too.

Keep exploring your ego but maintain your happiness above anyone else. You’ll be square!

[–]Nergaal1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's that I am shook by how shook I am from being cheated on.

That's why abundance mentality is impoortant. If you ahve abundance, you cannot spare to care.

[–]Ill_mumble_that1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You need more than just the mentality. To be emotionally bullet proof you need actual abundance. Always be approaching, even if you are in a LTR.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]mr-satan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You know what’s up!

[–]ProFriendZoner2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nailed it!!!

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 12 points13 points  (3 children) | Copy

You can't see red flags when you're wearing rose colored glasses.

This is one of those dumb quotes that actually smacks.

It's hard for me to accept the AWALT mindset 100%. I feel like I know a lot of women who would just never do something like that. Part of me always knew that the girl I was with was the type of woman who would. Now here we are.

Thanks for the input. I am looking forward to the emergence.

[–]smartfunction304 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

I feel like I know a lot of women who would just never do something like that.

Might they not do something like that, or just because your value is higher than theirs they wouldn't do it to you but they can do it to someone else?

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I guess all the women I am thinking of have lower SMV than me. Interesting point!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

A good lesson to take from this experience is to trust your instincts and never “lose yourself” in a relationship. You say “part of me always knew...” These were your instincts telling you that you were over-invested.

I’ve been there, and ignored my gut in the past. When you feel you need another person like you need a drug, you need to force yourself to take a step back and detach.

Hypergamy is real, and women don’t love us, they can only respect/admire us. It’s all about frame, and never stop talking to other women, even if you choose to get in a monogamous LTR. As they say, LTRs are the red pill on hard mode.

Your grieving, plain and simple. She almost may as well be dead, at least to your brain. You can’t put a time limit on grief. If you force a time limit, you’ll only make it harder.

It may feel weird, but dating other women ASAP does help. Be on the rebound—it’s healthy.

And remember, the best revenge is massive success.

[–]IcyBear716 points17 points  (15 children) | Copy

time. literally just time and the hard ass fucking conscious effort to distract yourself. If you are truly as great as you believe you are and you know this to be based on objective reality, then know that she will be going from one guy to another constantly comparing them to you and realizing she fucked up.

i know pua and rsd get shit on here but Tyler did say some profound things, one of them being: I gave her such a fun life filled with such a great social circle and parties that basically it'd take one of the most ripped tall guy on earth to replace me.

take on that philosophy

[–]faultywalnut9 points10 points  (13 children) | Copy

I second this, OP. Time is the only thing that will make it hurt less. You are doing all the right things, you did all the right things. I know it’s hard right now but just try to rationalize it and you’ll understand you’re not the issue at all. You didn’t fuck up, she’s dumb and selfish and gave you up and now she’s gonna have to live with that her entire life. I promise you sooner or later you’ll see things as they really are and that’s when the pain will leave. As for her, seeing things as they really are will actually cause her to hurt more, so take solace in that while your pain has nowhere to go now but down, she’s gonna suffer endlessly for her action.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 2 points3 points  (12 children) | Copy

How do I deal with the part of me that actually feels bad for her?

[–]second-last-mohican11 points12 points  (5 children) | Copy

I feel that one.. my ex started hanging with a muppet party boy who is a customer service guy at Hertz.. and doesn't even own a car, I know this cos I saw him driving her car. And he's like 3 years younger than her too.. she is always going out, like 3 nights a week (her way of dealing with the break up) and she rung me one Monday morning (after we broke up) stressed out because she was hung over and over slept missing her flight to a work conference asking what she should do. I still care for her obviously, but also feel disappointed and sorry for her. We had the next 12+ months planned out, so everything is all fucked up. We were moving to Canada next June, I was going to take some time off and study when we arrived so i was lost..
I've written down some shit i dislike about her and some other stuff and saved it in my notes to read over if I feel that feeling.. Also I'm gyming hard, saving heaps of cash and gonna head to Thailand for a month to travel alone next year, then move to Canada. Onwards and upwards.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

It may be helpful for me to write down things I dislike about here, I like that idea. Onwards and upwards indeed, my friend!

[–]second-last-mohican1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's my go to at the moment whenever i start missing her or think about wanting to get her back..

Sure I may feel bad, especially now that she is worse off and i'm actually progressing and actually succeeding ever batter than before, had a work bonus and large final pay as i'm leaving my job.. also i'm aiming to save around $16k in the first 4 months next year the world is gonna be my oyster. I do feel myself wanting to help her out though, and have over the past month once or twice with stuff.

But she called yesterday as she had a shit day, I was a little dismissive as I was busy and she asked how i was.. I told her I am "really good actually" had just been for a run and felt pumped.

Same as you bud - she chose this path, sure we may have had our own issues, but no one forced her to do what she did.. there is always a moment when you can act or not. (I have cheated before and know this for a fact) Or in my case, she was unhappy an didnt allow me a chance to fix it.

Focus on you

[–]2319Skew1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Welcome to Canada.

[–]second-last-mohican1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Which city should I move to? ExGf was from Toronto but no real reason I have to go there. I dont speak french btw.

[–]2319Skew1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keep in mind, yous should take what I say with a grain of salt since you shouldn't make a major life decision based on a response from an internet forum.

However, I've lived in 3 major cities in Canada.

Toronto is a city similar to new York in crime and style. You'll have a night life and decent school. It's also pretty multicultural.

Montreal is a party city and super full of hot and easy French girls with a cheap cost of living but good luck if you are only English speaking.

Calgary is great for work but boring AF unless you get hard from hiking and blondes. Honesty, I'd recommend it if you are looking for a good job in the oil fields but due to the government that isn't as good as it used to be. Most people work in the oil and gas.

Vancouver is also a city with considering but the cost of living is insane. Women are pretty though but I personally don't see much point in going there.

If you smoke pot, it's all legal.

I wouldn't recommend the Prairie or Maritimes and anything North is mostly a pit.

[–]i-am-the-prize3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

You need to cut that shit out.

Care only for those who care for you- she’s now disqualified from that group.

Your anger should help with that these early days.

Set your ego aside and think rationally what’s in your best interests moving forward.

Hang in there brother.

[–]bmw1999m34 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah, any time you get thoughts of the "good times" or feeling bad for the woman, I think it's important to remember the reasons you hate her. Think about the fact that she deceived you and quickly dispel any good feelings as they are YOUR own mind deceiving YOU. Never forgive and never forget. This is your source of power.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Never forgive, or never tell her that she is forgiven?

[–]faultywalnut3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

She’s a grown woman who made her decision consciously. She knew what she was doing. She felt no remorse until you broke up with her. Do you feel bad for criminals that got caught and are now in prison? Think of it that way, she fucked up, by choice, this is the consequence. She’s probably gonna regret it, she’s gonna come back when she does, and you gotta stay in frame and not let that regret fool you.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I haven't even begun to think about how I'm going to deal with her inevitable relapse yet. The criminal sympathy (or lack thereof) is helpful. Thanks for the new take on it.

[–]moonSOS1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

As you spend time improving yourself, research attachment theory & the different attachment styles... it’ll help a ton

[–]redpilllogin7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

I went through it more than once in my blue pill days. What you're feeling is completely normal and there's no magic pill that will fix it, only time my brother. You are doing the right thing by using the pain productively and working on yourself, but the shitty feeling won't go away overnight. It will take time. You are not the first nor the last person to go through this and the result is always the same: as time goes by things simply get better. That's all I can tell you. Keep doing what you're doing and trust the process. In a few months you're going to look back and you'll understand.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, this is comforting. Just hard to wait it out.

[–]tilleuno5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's not about her.

Its about your ego.

You can strip her out of the equation when you think about your feelings from now on. Because this is about you vs yourself.

Your vision of yourself becomes cracked as the cheating is physically manifested evidence that you are flawed.

This is your opportunity to slow down and take yourself introspective. Look at everything you think is wrong with you, and what you want to change and work on... and get to work on it.

It will take time, and the moment you go ZERO contact/looking on all fronts, is the moment that healing begins. If you open that door and look back (facebook, photos, Instagram, any version of looking back or checking up) - it stalls or reverses the healing process.

You are free again. You always were, this time the chill of being alone hits with more of a crisp air though. You need to get comfortable with that, learn to work on yourself until you LOVE yourself.

Travel if you can, 6 years is long. It's the ultimate way to get over a break up.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your vision of yourself becomes cracked as the cheating is physically manifested evidence that you are flawed.

Yep.

You are free again.

Am I really free if it came to be on someone else's terms? I feel pretty stuck. I get what you are saying though, and I hope I can come around this this soon.

[–]Manny140010 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy

That is going to happen to a lot of guys--in fact, most.

I thought I was Mr. hot shit before a chick cheated on me hardcore. I had broken up with all previous girlfriends before that. The chick who did me wrong was very hot, and had a pretty cool personality too, but I was a placeholder relationship for her, and she got back with her ex-boyfriend. Lied to me, and I felt like garbage. I was pissed.

Then I realized that the problem was me: I went into that with the wrong attitude, and let her control things. I was displaying some beta traits (jealousy, complaining, etc.). I was still relatively young and stupid.

So it was a blow to the ego, but it was also a learning experience. It took some time, but I learned to be carefree, more assertive in my desires, and less transfixed on women. And when I got my shit together, I finally did find a girl to marry. I've been married ever since.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Then I realized that the problem was me: I went into that with the wrong attitude, and let her control things. I was displaying some beta traits (jealousy, complaining, etc.). I was still relatively young and stupid.

I am coming to this conclusion as well and it is uncomfortable. Old me is dying, new me doesn't know itself yet.

[–]777views1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Give some advice on what you would have done differently? How to act in a relationship so you can prevent something like that etc...

[–]Nergaal3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Alcohol is a very nasty drug. Don't underestimate it.

I spent 6 years building up a solid-ass relationship with a great girl

It means she has started to be done with you probably at least half a year before the cheating happened. No even insane people give up a relationship of 6 years in a night. She has been mini-cheating on you for a while before that.

[–]ProFriendZoner4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Ok ... my take ...

YOU spent 6 years building up a solid ass relationship.

What did she do?

YOU were the best thing that ever happened to her.

That's a huge red flag to me. You can't treat a woman better than she thinks of herself. And as you learned, she didn't give a shit how you treated her.

YOU gave up alcohol for a month. So the previous six years you both were drinking. Do you know that she wasn't cheating on you with anyone else? Remember the alcohol was the excuse for the behavior. She was going to, or was already, fucking him.

Are you seeing the pattern yet?

YOU were the one doing it all.

What the @#$* was she doing in those 6 years besides using you for room and board?

You were the beta bucks.

You learned some harsh lessons and yes, I feel for you. It hurts like no other hurt in the world. But these emotions don't serve you anymore so jettison them. Keep doing what you're doing. Hanging out with friends and family. Reading the sidebar. Lifting and such.

And boundaries. Learn how to set them and to keep them.

And please, keep us posted as to your progress from this and any insights you come up with from it.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You can't treat a woman better than she thinks of herself.

This is probably the crux of it.

And please, keep us posted as to your progress from this and any insights you come up with from it.

I will. Give me a year.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

One of the challenges of dating someone for so long, and breaking up, is the social life.

If you built a social life together, and she splits, it can reduce your people-contact. Are you getting out enough? Are you replacing some of the interaction-time you lost, with fresh socializing?

If not, that may help.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Who knows if I am getting out enough, definitely less. I am working on this.

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Have you had to deal with her rebound?

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I am hoping my end result will be a positive one as well. Thanks for sharing.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon8 points9 points  (4 children) | Copy

I spent 6 years building up a solid-ass relationship with a great girl.

There is no such thing as relationship equity, and there are no perfect girls.

You do not "build a relationship". Relationships start awesome and go downhill. They are not an investment. It's more like having a car than a house: they start off fast and great .... they get slower.... the costs increase... and eventually you're just better off with a new car. The timelines vary, the story is universal.

If you got 6 years then great.... but I'm sorry you invested so much of yourself into this project that was owned and ultimately destroyed by someone else.

Sorry this happened and sorry I don't have more constructive to add, except to say this doesn't reflect on you. It's a cruel trick of women that makes men feel responsible in some way for their cheating. Fact is that a few years of your being faithful is enough to convince women that they need to cheat. It's brutal but inescapable.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Damn you and your flair!

I'll have to think about this. I have a lot of resistance to your opposition to building a relationship. I agree with a lot of the rest but I'd like to think that aside from our bodies, people do not depreciate.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

but I'd like to think that aside from our bodies, people do not depreciate

If it makes you feel any better, I'm not saying people depreciate. I'm saying relationships do.

Everyone knows you get the "honeymoon period", and after that you're supposed to settle for some sort of "companionship" or something dull like that. Problem is that even if you do, she's constantly getting offers from other exciting and attractive men and you can't compete with that because she already knows everything you have to offer.

The worst combination is where she secures your commitment and now the perks of other men are available cost free to her.

You get 2-3 good years if you're lucky. Then she tries to play for more commitment and marriage, all the time your mutual attraction is decreasing, sex is going downhill, the demands placed on you increase, and she talks of "love" and "marriage" while the guy is wondering what happened to all his hopes and dreams.

If you don't believe this, feel free to hunt around through your experience and everyone else you personally know.

If you want a good long lasting marriage, here's how you do it:

  • Find a virgin who isn't that attractive who pretends to have hippie values while being fearful and negative about all human friendships, relationships and sex
  • Do everything for her for 50 years while claiming she's so amazing and does so much and is so awesome in every way.
  • Agree with her on all feminist issues
  • Let her do nothing while she spits feminist vitriol about all female roles
  • Do everything that a man should do and 90% of the woman's work too

This worked for my father. Not sure that even that is enough these days, you'd probably also have to go out and find men to bring back and fuck her while saying how amazingly pansexual she is.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That is such a sad way to look at it. How do you structure your relationships? I imagine if your father has been married for 50 years that you must be old enough to have gone through the time in your life when most people shackle themselves to each other.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is such a sad way to look at it.

And that's the best. The rest end in divorce and/or misery. I saw my relationships going down the toilet too: they started off mediocre and went downhill over a few years.

In the end I worked out what I wanted (sex, fun) and what I didn't (everything else), and then I started doing that. It's been so great that there is no fucking way I am ever going back to monogamy.

How do you structure your relationships?

Non-monogamously, and "see how it goes". The relationships last longer and the girls treat me wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy better.

[–]dzkkne3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Look, I don’t know what kind of relationship you had, the were probably some red flags that you didn’t notice. I doubt it was all perfect and out of the blue.

I have been in similar situation, 8 years together and engaged..

Basically man, it takes time. You need to try chill out, accept what you feel. Don’t try and get in to this angry mode - I hate women, I will never be cheated on ever again bla bla

This shit happens left and right. Just understand that it will take your brain at least a few months to a year to get over it and fully recover your ego. In the mean time you should try and fill your life with new experiences including new women.

Just think about the benefits of not being in the relationship and go stuff that you wanted all this time.. dive in

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks, there were definitely some red flags. Some of which we addressed, some of which went unnoticed. I learned a lot for sure. 8 years is a long time... what did you get in to that you had been missing out on?

[–]dzkkne1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Partying, travelling alone, I am quite adventurous and there is stuff you can only do alone or with other men - the type of holidays where you don’t have to consider what your gf does etc.

In general the feeling of freedom from having to consider another person every time you want to do something or change direction in your life. You are responsible only to yourself!

[–]Andrew543213 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

  1. Accept full responsibility of the situation.
  2. What can you learn/gain from this? (Bet it was your vetting)
  3. What do you want?
  4. What can you change about your thinking, actions and decisions to get to what you want?
  5. What is the duration of this attempted change before review?
  6. What can be acted upon within 48 hours?
  7. Execute 6.
  8. Repeat 6 & 7 for as long as specified in 5.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

  1. OK
  2. A lot
  3. To be better, fundamentally.
  4. I don't know, I'll have to try things.
  5. Probably a month.
  6. The things I have been doing.
  7. On it.
  8. I guess my timeline is a little short.

[–]Andrew543210 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah you’re tripping up on #4. Notice how your responses became more wishy-washy.

[–]StoicRadiant3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

I had a girl of about three years cheat on me. Around this time I was already quite red pilled, but I also practiced Stoicism. One thing that gets hammered into you is negative visualization, in which you occasionally take the time to visualize bad things that may happen to you. The thought process is that because you would take the time to visualize these things every now and then, you'd mentally strengthen yourself against it. So when this girl cheated on me, it still hurt, but the mental impact was rather minimal, and thus it was much easier for me to move forward. Life is nothing but change, and there are only a few things we have control of. A committed relationship can go south at any time as we only have a some control of it. Enjoy your time with that person, but keep in mind that "the glass is already broken."

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I like this. First TRP pill post I saw was the stoic trio of mindsets posts about negative visualization, voluntary discomfort, and a view from above. I reflect on these often, but did not do so enough in the context of the relationship. Thanks.

[–]drsherbert2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It was 6 years dawg. I’m willing to bet at least 3 of those were good. So 50% or more of it was good. Try not to focus on all the shitty moves you made. I’m sure you could’ve done some things better, but so could she. it’s not a reflection of your ineptitude. It’s her inability to control her sexual impulses. I’ve been thru it before. The shit hurts, but it does get better. Right now, you’re probably thinking like, what did that guy have that you didn’t? The answer is nothing. She’ll keep prodding for his weakness and exploit it. They can’t help it. Take good care of yourself and your friends and family. Feel the pain in its entirety and become a stronger man. This is a growth period. If you keep growing, the next one won’t be able to hurt you.

[–]ChadTheWaiter1002 points3 points  (12 children) | Copy

Why did you give up caffeine? 10 years ago my ex cheated on me with my best friend, while I was on life support. You’ll live bro.

[–]PhaedrusHunt1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

WT effin F

Lost your girl and your best bro at the same time.

What trashy people. Ugh.

What were the circumstances and how did you find out?

That's just awful man

[–]ChadTheWaiter1000 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Lol. Don’t wanna say here if you’re that interested pm and I’ll tell you

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

I drank too much of it and like to prove to myself that I don't need things. It will come back, but it's helpful to know I can do without.

Also I'm sorry about that man. I know my situation could be much worse. Hope you are healthy now.

[–]ChadTheWaiter1001 point2 points  (8 children) | Copy

i wanna cut caffeine bc the stim effects drive me crazy but I keep it bc of the fatburning properties. Keeps my six pacc despite eating like a fat piece of shit

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

I think the difference it makes is trivial.

[–]ChadTheWaiter1001 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

For me it’s essential. It makes a small difference but my overall fitness is compiled of many small choices that all come together to form my regimen. So it is an important component.

If you have 5 components of let say, 5% each then that’s 25% overall. And 5% of 25% is 20%. So the difference it makes is real.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

If we are talking like TDEE with and without caffeine, I bet the difference would be literally less than 10 calories a day. Then your sleep can be messed with which hurts recovery.

[–]ChadTheWaiter1001 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

No I mean caffeine as a fat burner not calories. I don’t track overall calories to the 10. Your sleep will be impacted if you take it too late and don’t tire yourself out enough.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Right, I meant to address that too. AFAIK there is no physiological mechanism which would allow a logical person to conclude that "caffeine burns fat." All it does is pick your heart rate up a little and add a couple calories to your TDEE. The rest of your diet, how frequently you eat, etc. is what determines what kind of energy is utilized by your body in burning up those 10 extra caffeine calories.

But just like you can't target fat loss with exercise (e.g. doing sit-ups will never burn stomach fat) you can't eat something and assume it will somehow seek fat and burn it.

[–]ChadTheWaiter1001 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

It’s proven that it boosts your metabolism. You can find 20 studies that it does and 5 saying it doesn’t so I guess you believe what you want to. But for me, at least anecdotal speaking, it does make a noticeable difference bc I’m shredded and I eat healthy 70% of the time. I don’t count each calorie or macro bc I’ve worked my diet out to wear I get sufficient nutrients to make gainz and stay ripped.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah it's probably not the coffee haha. Glad you have found something that works for you though, just being lean puts you in the top 10% of people these days.

[–]ialreadyreadit3331 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

That's 6 years of building trust broken in one go. You're going to have to grieve for the relationship and that's exactly what you're going through.

It's important to remember as you do this, though, that her actions speak about her character... not about your value.

While you go through this process keep occupied with self improvement as you always should, and you will find yourself beginning to heal in no time.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

her actions speak about her character... not about your value.

Thanks, this is good stuff.

[–]gsp95111 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Look up these two videos on Youtube. They have helped me a lot to get in the right mindset to go through a recent painful breakup. The videos' titles are:

  • How to heal a broken heart | Guy Winch

  • Surviving a breakup - Russell Brand

Also, whenever the thought of her crosses your mind, just let it cross. Don't fight it. But don't delve into it, either. Just let the thought come... and go. That being said, practicing meditation might also help you.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've thought about meditation... might try to pick that up. Also I'll check those vids out. Thanks.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

A month is nowhere near enough time to get over this. You need to realise it's probably going to take at least a year for this to stop sucking. You're not even over the worst of it yet. Suffering and pain are part of life and it's just something you need to put up with until time heals.

What TRP prescribes isn't an instant fix. It is the best you can do in a shitty situation. You will be suffering for a while. My last LTR I left her and it took me about 18 months to stop suffering when I dwelt on it all. I knew it was the right choice but it took a long time for the love to fade.

Just chin up bro and believe that time will eventually heal. Time heals all. It will feel like it's never going to get better, especially once you're like 6-9 months in and you still feel sad/angry about it. But one day you'll look back on it all and you won't feel pain. That is certain.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks. I am very patient but this really wears me out.

[–]beastmodeking1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Bro you were with her for 6 years onentis or not your going to feel pain. Sounds like you both have had trouble with drinking sorry to hear. Girls act in the moment she got drunk and cheated she would never take responsibility for her actions though because women never do. She will blame the alcohol or her boss etc. she should have never been allowed to go out alone with her boss though. That’s a boundary you need to have as a man. You have to put your foot down and tell her she could go hang with her boss but just know when you come back this relationship is over. I would journal about this relationship. What did you learn ? About yourself and her ? What lessons can you take out of this ? Look back and right down all the red flags and warning signs and right down all the times you gave into her frame. Every relationship in life is a lesson not just with girls but everyone your involved with. You must learn the lessons that this relationship brought you so next time you don’t repeat the same mistakes. bro I feel for you I can feel your pain I know it’s hard. Do what I said and continue to grow and become the best man you can be. As for this ho block her number and block her from all social social media if you haven’t already. You have to treat her as if she’s dead it’s time for you to heal and come back stronger. Also the reason it’s so hard because she’s like your drug. Your brain got so used to her with all the emotions etc once you take that drug away In this situation this girl your brain is gonna go crazy. Time heals all wounds is what I’ll also like to add

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I would journal about this relationship. What did you learn ? About yourself and her ? What lessons can you take out of this ? Look back and right down all the red flags and warning signs and right down all the times you gave into her frame.

I like to write -- I'll give this a shot. Thanks for the input.

[–]1pointtwentyone1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Sorry man. Don’t underestimate the effect that giving up caffeine has on your mood. It will take a long time for your brain to rewire. I feel “small” when I give it up.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Interesting, I thought it would help rather than compound any affect. I'll give it another few weeks and then bring it back.

[–]Kabuki4311 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

This community is the biggest supporter of people who have been wronged by women, you will get some tough love here. Being said that

Your new love is iron, it will never disappoint you, cheat on you or let you down.

Use anger as fuel to build your self back up.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Tough love is exactly what I am asking for :)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

When you're in relationship, you brain releases dopamine, so now it's over, your body misses those dopamine hits it used to have,

It's same like when a drug user tries to stop using it, it's body crave for it.

So only way you can feel normal is when your body get used to not getting those dopamine hits and that my friend happens only with time and Patience .

I've been through this, it will take time but you will be okay with time.

You're really not missing that person but those dopamine hits.

[–]2319Skew1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

OP I feel you man.

I'll share with you my story but it's one that you'll hear countless times and if anything that I share helps then all the better.

I was married to what I honestly believed was a goddamn unicorn. Strong morals, no dick count, good family ties and she was average with a what I thought was a good personality.

Almost 11 years later, after our child was born, I was picking up the pieces of my broken heart and trying to rationalize why it was all over.

She didn't cheat but after my son was born, she pushed me out her life like yesterday's garbage.

I spent thousands trying to build a life with her, moved across the country to make her happy and overcame my fear of creating a family only to have that smash my face and break me.

Here's what I learned:

There are no unicorns

All things end. Good or bad it's all temporary

Your pain is unoriginal and others have shared it

Your ego is all that truly hurts . You are not your ego.

She's not special or unique.

When you are going through hell it makes sense to keep going

Don't get me wrong, it's been years and there are times where I miss the idea of her but then I remind myself that the same women who lay on my chest after a passion filled night is the same person that tried to frame me for assault to keep my son away from me since it was the only way to hurt me.

After hooking up and seeing so very many single moms, it shook me to the core how quickly they lay blame on the guy and realizing that she's doing the same with some random Chad gave me an appreciation for how real war widows is a thing.

You are dead to her. She's moved on. Don't hold onto a barbed anchor when you have an entire sea to sail.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sorry you had to go through that, man. Thank you for sharing your take.

[–]PhaedrusHunt1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Fuck it man.

We've all been there.

Although that's really got to suck this far into a relationship.

Anytime I was cheated on it was within the first year. Six years is a long time. I know that shit hurts.

But let's be honest. I bet this bitch was a pain in the ass.

Wasn't she?

Fuck her.

Fuck her feelings. Fuck her crawling back to you.

I got married when I was 23, she screwed around with a rando she met at the bar. Made excuses changed her story so many times all that. I tried to make it work for a bit, actually revenge cheated (the follies of youth) with an absolute dime piece that had what is still to this date damn near two decades later the absolute best feeling pussy I've ever fucked. And guess who got turned into the bad guy?

You should not care about the feelings of women like this at all. They get NONE of your sympathy. I remember when I told her I was leaving. She got violent and that was that. It was during the middle of a move when we were moving to a bigger house. I had to take about a week to get my stuff ready, and we had both places during that overlap. But the last two nights I went ahead and stayed with her, fucked her cold blooded as hell. The next morning I had a definite time I was going to leave. She was making my favorite food (the bitch could really cook I'll give her that) but I was just leaving, are yelling at me aren't you going to stay and eat? Desperate. I turned on my heel and walked.

She called me and I answered. She said she was going to go commit suicide (this was a total low blow because my sister had committed suicide Just a couple of years prior, and she knew how deeply that had affected me). I laughed and told her to do it, that she would be doing me a favor. Then I called her brother and told him he should go check on her because she had told me that. He laughed his ass off. He hated her and had warned me about her. Wish I still knew him lol.

Remember, she is solipsistic. She didn't give your feelings the time of day.

For your own mental health, block her everywhere.

And go get some pussy. It helps (it did for me anyway), and it will make you feel attractive again.

In the meantime work on yourself and really spend some time analyzing the relationship. Was it your fault? Did you vet correctly? Where did you go wrong?

Also how did you find out?

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I found out by accident, she never would have told me. But she knew she fucked up. She broke up with me that weekend and just made up a bunch of shit about why. I just left and stayed with other friends and such until about a month later I finally got a piece of info that gave me the truth, which was that she cheated and couldn't handle the guilt, so she broke it off with me.

I know about the solipsism, etc. Did the blocking. I need to work on myself a bit before I am ready to get back into dating, but I know that will help.

Thanks.

[–]Vipe7771 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Had a very similar experience in September. 3.5 years of relationship, I'm the best thing that's ever happened to her (according to basically everyone around her), then out of the blue she hooks up with some guy.

It still hurts very, very much, I'm not gonna lie. But the thing that has helped me tremendously is just getting in contact with other girls again. I do this via Tinder, since I don't really have time to go out at the moment (full time job, dog at home). Just getting girls to write me, to compliment me, to want to meet up with me, that helps taking my brain off of her.

I also remind myself of the following saying; pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
It will hurt, but it's your choice if you let it bring you down.

(This is just one thing, other users already commented some other very important things like go lift, concentrate on yourself, read, meditate etc. Don't neglect those things!)

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ha that's another thing is that it wasn't just her that thought I was hot shit, it was her entire family and all our mutual friends. Which, honestly -- red flag. Her aunt told her that if she ever left me she would kill her.

I also remind myself of the following saying; pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
It will hurt, but it's your choice if you let it bring you down.

I like this. Thanks.

[–]whammyface1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

I’m curious as to has she’s been since she cheated. You tell the guys wife? You report them to HR?

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

The place she worked is more of a frat house than a company. It's a bunch of mid-40s men, and her -- a beautiful late 20s redhead girl. No other women can handle that job for more than a couple weeks, always get driven out. My god should that have been a red flag.

[–]whammyface1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Sooooo... how is she acting? How did you find out? Have you reported it to hr (actually I probably wouldn’t in this situation)? And did you tell the guys wife? She deserves to know.

It doesn’t matter where she works. She’s a woman. She’s going to constantly get hit on everywhere... social media, work, the grocery store, your kids t-ball game.... everywhere. It’s on her to have boundaries and it’s on you to take control when you think they are crossed. You probably had plenty of time, opportunity, and reasons to drop the hammer leading up to this. But seriously, tell the guys wife.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

How she acted was breaking up with me. At first I didn't know she had cheated, I found this out a few weeks ago. She immediately went from friendly lover who I knew well to complete alien and shut-in. Probably due to her guilt.

Dude is not married and essentially is the "HR department" there. I have no recourse. He has been inappropriate since she started working here; asking her about our sex life, asking her to have private meetings in her car, rewarding her performance with offers to have 1-on-1 dinners.... I tried to get her to quit, but I think part of her liked being in an environment like that. This is when our relationship started to fail.

[–]whammyface1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeh. There’s is no point in going to HR. Especially if you are done with her. If she was your wife that’s a different story. And don’t say you have no recourse. You have plenty of recourse. If you have proof, you could get him fired tomorrow. Easily. To be honest, I’d do it. There’s no why I would let this slide without atleast trying to get back at that dude.

How is she acting know? Hopefully you’ve blocked her and got her out your life after informing her family and mutual friends why. Please dont tell Me you are still living with her. If you’re stuck there for financial reasons, I hope your going out, living your life, and bringing girls home.

I think going full red pill right now is putting the cart before the horse in terms of your mental health. Get your ass over to survivinginfidelity.com

The “just found out” forum is full of seasoned vets that will give you great advice and support. And the advice is akin to RP philosophy. The healing library is a good place to check out too.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the input; I'll check those places out.

I really can't do anything about the dude and would rather not bother with it. He's a cunt but he performs well and they aren't going to boot him out because he slept with one of the people who reports to him. I should be able to report him and get him fired, and at any self-respecting establishment, I could. But, this place is a frat house as I said, and he performs well. It's a sales job. If anything they encourage behavior like this in the interest of keeping around people who sell (my ex).

I don't know how she is acting now. I lived with her after we broke up until I found out she cheated. Left that weekend. Blocked everywhere. Got taken off the lease we had. Nothing ties me to her anymore.

She really doesn't have any family I can tell, which is why I know I am the best thing that's ever happened to her.

[–]idontevenlift371 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

6 years man, that’s a long time. Fact of the matter is she was a big part of your life and now thanks to her shitty decision she can’t be part of it anymore. You don’t get over something like that overnight, no matter how red pilled you are. It’s just gonna take some time, plain and simple. I’m just like you, when I sit down and it’s just me and my thoughts they tend to go where I don’t want them to. Just gotta keep grinding and keep yourself busy. With more success and growth you’ll get past this brother.

[–]amphix3391 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hey man I don't really have any great advice, never been in such a LTR but I see your head is in the right space and you're thinking about this logically, more than most people can do. Like all things it'll get better with time but there is only one thing that will make it all better; fuck more bitches

[–]ThatCub3K1d1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Pretty new to trp only been going at it for a couple months now. So I'm not gonna be the guy who tells you how to go back out and hold.frame with other women again. No I'm gonna be the guy who got cheated on from a girl I had killer oneitis for. For a girl I lived with was feeding her, paying her rent, and paying for her car insurance. I was ready to marry this girl in an instant. Long story short slept with roommate, kicker her out, she moved in with my roommate, for various reasons I won't get into rn I kinda had to live with them for 6-7 months after the matter. This was all when I was a blue pill bitch, so I had no idea what I was doing. Thought I just lost my soulmate. Life was rough, suicidal thoughts all the time. I had to pick myself back up, without the help of this community, without any knowledge of abundance mentality, or how to go out find another girl or even interest in another girl. So those moments of being alone, was pretty much me 24/7. I get it it sucks, blindsided, no idea what you did wrong or how to not let it happen again, where to even go. Well I can tell you it gets a lot better, the more you sit and obsessively think about it you won't go anywhere. What did it for me was new girls, had to have relationships with new girls, see the difference. Begin to learn and pick up what works and what doesn't. It really helps you break down what happened and where you went wrong as well as compare and contrast. For me that gave me confidence, learning how to improve. This was all years before I found redpill, think about how well you can do with this pool of knowledge and a community. Don't commit, if you do, be prepared for infidelity. If she doesn't great you did good you held frame you kept your smv higher than any other guy she was capable of attracting. If she does learn where you lost frame and move on to the next girl. There's no reason to sit and mope, once you learn that and same thing happens again it's no big deal the next time. That's all I got for ya.

Sorry for bad grammar and spelling, on mobile will fix when get home to PC.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I appreciate it man, thanks for the input.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I appreciate it man, thanks for the input.

[–][deleted]  (8 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I believe her that it was the first time. We talked about infidelity at the genesis of our relationship, and I made it dead fucking clear that anything like that would be a dealbreaker. She didn't have the balls to tell me she did it -- she just broke up with me that weekend when I came back. I found out the truth later, somehow else.

Where I fell short here I think was not setting appropriate boundaries before the cheating happened.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

u/speedracer1111 Also I'd appreciate if you expand a little on your toss-out of the moral compass. I have had opportunities already since this breakup to be with 2 married women (separately) and I didn't for the sole reason that they were married. I didn't want to be the reason some other man has to go through what I am going through. Some part of you has to understand that you shouldn't do that to people -- where's your head at here?

[–][deleted]  (5 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

I feel like the Red Pill is about taking agency of your life to be better. How are you better for that?

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I think they would equally reprehensible, if you knew. If I found out a plate was married after some time together, I'd let her know I think that's shitty and then next her.

What I dislike about it is that I think the world would be a better place if people who committed to other people did not break those commitments. I won't be one to propagate the type of behavior I wish was not present.

All we are is the aggregate of our actions. Everyone collectively affects everyone else. Think of yourself as a node in a network. I act in the interest of the type of world I want.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I feel that way because that's what I have come to understand to be the truth. It doesn't come from any one place.

Unmarried people lose the ability to interact with married people once they are married.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

dude... SHESS AAA HOOEEEEE

go get your dick wet bro damn

[–]777views0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

ANOTHER REASON WHY MEN NEED TO STAY IN THE ANGER PHASE. It’s time to stop being fucking nice and respectful to women because this is what they do in return.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The anger phase of what?

[–]EvelynnSpoiler0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

on the 25th day I went to a football game with my family, stayed sober the whole time. She went out and got drunk with her boss and fucked him.

Why do you think the Bible and Quran talk about putting a metaphorical leash over women? Women act on how they feel and cannot be trusted

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is one thing I have learned as well upon reflection; nothing she every said really mattered at all. The truth was to be found in her behavior.

[–]BurnieSlander0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I think the main thing you are upset about is that you wasted your time on a low quality girl for so long. You are upset because you know you ignored a lot of red flags and could have been single and slaying for the past few years.

These regrets will dissipate when you start hanging out with high quality women and understanding that there are tons of girls out there who are way smarter than a bimbo who throws away 6 years to bang her boss.. who will discard her like the trash she is

[–]777views4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Fuck that there’s no such thing as a high quality chick they’re all the same. Dude wake up and realize all women are capable of this

[–]BurnieSlander0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Self-fulfilling prophecy. All women are the same when you treat them all the same. I realize it’s easier for an ape like you to do think in these simple terms but it just isn’t true. You will make it true because you will behave in ways that make it so. Fact is you probably just aren’t high enough SMV to ever have been treated like a true alpha.

[–]rustyspurs870 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

r / MGTOW

(No linking subreddits allowed on asktrp)

Check it out and see what you think. At the very least everyone there is very supportive and understanding of situations like yours because most of us have been through something similar.

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I've been there and I don't think it's the kind of support I need.

The fundamental message (to me) of TRP is that your suffering is your fault, and that this is good. It means you can fix it. Crawl your way out. Change the way you think and behave. Plan and prepare. You can be more than you are, and that will make things better for you.

MGTOW people have given up. Their suffering is due to the nature of women and society and no matter what they do, they can never really be safe. It doesn't matter what they become, because nothing will change. I think this is not the whole picture.

I will check out some of the other infidelity posts though because one of the best things for me has been reading about other men having been through something similar. It helps to know that worse things happen to better people.

[–]rustyspurs871 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I appreciate the work you put into that well thought out response. I was honestly a little worried about you after reading your post, but after reading this I think you’re going to be just fine. Better than just fine, you’re going to come back from this stronger than ever.

Keep your head up brother!

[–]INAPICTTAA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks man. The post makes me sounds depressed, which is partially true, but it's not because I am a depressed person by nature. It's because something in my life went horribly wrong lol.



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