I have a nuanced perspective on mate guarding, and I'd like to be called out on my bullshit if you think this is wrong, so don't pull any punches here and let me know what you think.
I know the default RP advice is to not mate guard. And from a passive-aggressive, "being a controlling boyfriend" perspective, I get that.
With that said, I've had a handful of situations in my life where I physically mate guarded a girlfriend. I would tell a guy to fuck off, or shove a guy, or physically removed him from the situation.
This certainly wasn't all the time, maybe 3-4 times over the last 10 years. But every time it happened, it was always very appreciated by my woman, usually followed by wild sex.
Strangely enough, both of these opposing views make sense to me at the same time. The cognitive dissonance is real, folks.
The problem with this, is you'll never be able to always physically mate guard. There's going to be a situation where it won't be a good idea to mate guard a Jason Momoa. You're also likely going to be out-ranked in SMV at one point. Even if you're an 8 and working on yourself every day, you could very well find yourself in a situation where your woman is talking to a 9.
I have a problem with this, because I want a practical solution for how to handle this every time, and I'm not convinced there is one. I've been fortunate enough where to date, every mate guarding situation I was in was easy: dude was lower in SMV and smaller in size, and it was quickly ended. But that doesn't help me when I run into Jason Momoa.
Now, of course, the single best strategy for all of this is to consistently improve your SMV. I get that. But what I'm having a hard time getting my head around, is a straight-forward playbook on how to handle mate guarding. I'm not fully convinced the community has a 100% verified, repeatable playbook on how to handle this. Everyone's automatic answer is:
- Soft next her
- She's not yours, it's just your turn
- Increase your SMV and fuck other women
Okay, guys, I get it. We all get that. But that doesn't mean there's no other solution.
I'd love your thoughts: is mate guarding alpha or beta? How do you handle it?