My relationship is over. We spent 15 months together.

And even though it was something I wanted, I’m still heartbroken. Breakups suck. I have to move home now, with my parents. It’s just temporary and will give me time to save some money and get ready to purchase my first home. I’m hugely grateful that I’m currently working from home and this is even an option.

I just really hate change. I know this is for the best, but I’m not looking forward to it. I had made this place my home. I love it here. And now I have to leave.

I really do love him dearly and care for him deeply. I’m sad it had to end like this. I guess it was due, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I know he’s not the guy for me. I’ve had doubts for months. But he (generally) treats me well, we never fight, and we are happy… enough. I’m sure our lives together would have been okay. But deep down, I know I deserve more.

I deserve someone who truly sees my value.
I deserve someone who wants to give me their full attention.
I deserve someone who treats me like the prize I am.
I deserve someone who spoils me, in every sense of the word.
I deserve someone who prioritizes their health.
I deserve someone with a full head of hair and a nicely groomed beard.
I deserve someone who loves my cats and doesn’t just put up with them.
I deserve someone who is supportive of me and everything I do.
I deserve someone who wants to get outside and explore the world.
I deserve someone who shares the same taste in shows and music.
I deserve someone who prioritizes my pleasure and loves to treat me in the bedroom.
I deserve someone who isn’t afraid to talk about marriage.
I deserve someone who texts me every day.
I deserve someone who respects themselves enough to not wear sweatpants outside (huge pet peeve of mine LOL).
I deserve someone who gives me compliments and makes me feel appreciated.
I deserve someone who doesn’t forget my birthday, Valentine’s or our ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY.
I deserve someone who showers daily and washes their damn face.
I deserve someone who isn’t texting another woman behind my back.
I deserve someone who doesn’t pick up their phone while I’m talking to them.
I deserve someone who doesn’t think my friends are annoying.
I deserve someone who shares my sense of humour.
I deserve someone who cares about things because they matter to me.
I deserve someone who stays up at night thinking about how he’s going to keep ME.
I deserve someone who wants to take pictures together.
I deserve someone who won’t make me feel anxious about posting certain things for fear of judgment.
I deserve someone who would get along with my brothers.
I deserve someone who doesn’t eat like a goddamn animal and trigger my misophonia.
I deserve more.