Hit rock bottom. Starting form scratch. Need help badly.

Hakametal · 2017-01-14T15:57:39+00:00

You are seeking validation from external sources. Whether or not you realise it, you are putting women, drugs and alcohol above yourself.

That is your problem.

Start to look inwards, learn how to meditate, read Meditations.

Piroko · 2017-01-14T13:47:32+00:00

Okay so what I'm not seeing in there is what you were even studying.

I'm gonna take the CaptainCapitalism stance on this one and say that if you're going to drop money on college, you'd A) better damn well take it seriously because it is costing you, and B) it'd better damn well be for something that pays.

When I was in engineering college it was 15 hour days 6 days a week to keep up. Got the piece of paper AND THEN I could take a break.

Randomshortdude · 2017-01-14T17:42:50+00:00

I'm sorry but I hate the advice you were given in this thread op.

Your problem is you need to grow up. I'm guessing you're somewhere between 19 & 20 and you're still adjusting in life and going through growing pains. Understandable.

That being said, you need to start developing into a man with real priorities and the ability to say no. That, in itself, will help your "personality".

Also you need to get your priorities straight. You mentioned embarrassing your family, wasting money flunking out of one school and having to transfer among drug addiction and binge drinking and your take away from this is that you need to enhance your sexual strategy? Bro, get your fucking head on straight.

You're in a lucky position to have parents who can financially support you in college - out of state at that. All this hooking up w girls shit isn't going to matter if you flunk out and end up working at Wal-Mart.

It's time for you to start taking school seriously and doing something else with your time other than getting high, partying and trying to fuck bitches. That's how you grow your personality. You're not interesting. You aren't involved in any cool groups, community activities, or have any passions or hobbies that can decently attract someone.

My opinion: Focus on school right now. Getting girls should be the least of your concern. It sounds like your mind is still focused on being the coolest guy on campus instead of what really matters - getting your fucking degree.

I hope this post is a wake up call man. Take your life seriously, stop wasting your parent's money if you care about them and man up. You're all pleasure and 0 work and that's the make up of a little boy. Have the nuts to tell your friends "Naw not this weekend man I got an exam on Monday. I'll get up with you next week."

It's college. There's a party every fucking week. The same hoes are always out there getting drunk. The bars and clubs are always popping. There's always some drama, fun or excitement to be had. You aren't missing anything if you decide to just chill out for a night and study.

I understand freshman year, but you're now on the back half of your sophomore year and you should've been started tapering down the party animal mood.

Like I said, I get it. I'm 23. I just graduated college a couple years ago so I know what it's like. You're out there partying, fucking bitches, and it's amazing. But you gotta get work done. If you can't succeed there then don't expect to succeed in the real world either because Mommy and Daddy won't be able to tell the landlord don't put your shit out in the street because you got fired for partying too much and can't pay rent.

You can either start taking life seriously and learning how to be a man now or flunk out and move back home with Mom and Dad and be a loser for the rest of your life. You decide. Be a grown man or be Frat bro supreme?

GOATmar · 2017-01-14T16:50:38+00:00

Spend 20's getting rich.

Then spend 30's partying.

You age, high school/college chicks don't.

Few understand this.

Mckallidon · 2017-01-14T16:15:28+00:00

Lol. I had a 3.9 gpa and was on drugs almost the entire time. One semester I took my finals on acid. Your only mistake was not doing your work and questioning yourself. Same problem you're having here. Give zero fucks. Just roll. Do your work towards what you give a fuck about. Don't be autistic and analyze shit. If life is a game it has infinite levels so move forward and move on from the past by learning from it. Lift or not groom yourself and know how to dress yourself without overthinking it. The key to socializing is that you don't have to do anything in particular. Game without game is natural and the result of going out, not giving a fuck and being focused on you.

Don't focus on women. Focus on how you compare to other men. Focus on bettering yourself amongst men. Make the best of your looks and wear decent clothes. Keep your car clean and reliable. Keep your living space clean. Don't let you or your spaces have weird smells etc. Finish your education if that's what you want to do. If not get very skilled at something of value. Be good at stuff you want to be good at. This is key. It is the source of real inner conference and has your life directed where you want it to be so you can focus on enjoying it. It doesn't matter if it's working out, juggling or drawing. If you're very good at something you trust yourself and people naturally respect you.

Fretting if chicks will bang you is a bad place to put yourself in. You cannot control what women want and they're mentally ill children. You can however control yourself and basing your sense of self in that is a safer bet. Paradoxically is that the more generally fuckable you are, the less you care.

CuntyMcFagnuts69er · 2017-01-14T14:34:01+00:00

Listen and listen hard. I have a very similar story. But I managed to graduate from a very good private school, marry a very attractive Albanian girl, and keep a lucrative career into my thirties. All the while drinking, doing cocaine, and many other drugs. On the surface I seemed to be living the dream.

Then it all fell apart. I had to go to two rehabs. I got everything back, but I had to lose everything and learn in the hardest of ways. Go to rehab, just go. Substance abuse is a progressive disease and you won't get better on your own. Look into drugs called naltrexone and Antabuse. Listen to a grizzled old man who has been to hell and back, who had to claw his way back. Pm if you want further advice.

k1ndbud · 2017-01-14T14:01:00+00:00

You obviously have an addictive personality and self control issues. The only thing you can do is stop drinking and doing drugs entirely and focus on doing well academically, at least for a full semester to prove you can. Join some social clubs to entertain yourself and make friends. This will allow you to develop sober/day game as well. Good luck.

Proud_Homo_Sapien · 2017-01-14T16:38:26+00:00

Hi, I'm a medical student. I'm not a doctor yet but I know a what I'm talking about. You should really see a mental health professional. You decide if that be at a rehabilitation center, an in patient psychiatric care facility, or just a psychiatrist's office. They will be able to help. Right now there is nothing you can do to make you life better other then to turn to medicine, religion, or both. Whatever works for you. Growing up in the Dayton area and working with the addicts who live here, I've seen it legitimately thousand times. If you truly want to help yourself, you'll stop the self destructive lifestyle you're living and seek help. It's by far not too late for you, or for anyone for that matter. I hope you do the right thing.

sosueme · 2017-01-14T17:33:54+00:00

Look at mushrooms and led microdosing therapy for alcoholism. It works. It saves lives. Also look for an IOP in your area. Do your parents have health insurance from their workplace? Are you under 26 still? Rehabs take insurance better if it is not Obamacare /ACA, trust me I work on the benefits verification side. If you see value in this post PM me for more

RP_SuitScholar · 2017-01-14T17:38:25+00:00

Dude. You are still a fucking kid. Take all the fucking pressure off yourself. Don't do Adderall anymore because you are addicted to it now, pass college so you don't waste your money (though I think college itself is a waste of money personally, my Master's degree does shit for me), and take pussy as it comes. You have self-diagnosed all of your issues very well, but there's this undercurrent of pressure you are putting on yourself that is going to put you in an early grave. Fucking relax.

slicklol · 2017-01-14T19:57:11+00:00

Dude, start meditating. That's my advice.

[deleted] · 2017-01-14T16:00:08+00:00

Your mistake was not trying meth first and not drinking milk

Tamedol · 2017-01-14T19:56:44+00:00

Hey guys. I read all the responses and and they were really a wake up call for me. I've been living a shit hedonistic lifestyle that has gotten me nothing. Its clear thats I forgot one of the core principles of trp which is not relying on women for validation. I'm going monk mode until the summer at least and will be focusing on only school, work, lifting, guitar, college repubs, and reading... no partying/drugs/alcohol for awhile. I fucking love this community thanks guys.

one_percenter_ · 2017-01-14T14:23:22+00:00

I'd urge you to find a bigger challenge.

Part of the reason you are CLEARLY depressed is that you checked a lot boxes in college. Now you gotta focus on the major league.

rorrr · 2017-01-14T20:49:53+00:00

You're a drug addict and an alcoholic. Everything else is either a direct result of it, or really minor (one HB8 in 4 month, how could you?).

So treat your addictions. If you're strong enough, you can just quit cold turkey, but most addicts aren't.

Marcus1138 · 2017-01-15T04:17:32+00:00

Hey mate, tons of good advice here. Not much I can add, but I'll ask you a question:

Do you want to be responsible for your life?

Simple question, huh? But do you want that? Are you willing to take responsibility for your actions and the outcomes of your actions?

If not, keep doing what you're doing. You can blame drugs, society, laziness, family, whatever, if you fail. Great excuses, no one will judge you. But if you succeed, you can't take credit for it. If you succeed, it's luck, circumstance, genes. You don't get to pick and choose what you take responsibility for.

If your answer was yes, you want to take responsibility for your own life, then you're on a harder path. Why? Because failure's easier than success. It's less risky to not take responsibility, that way when you fail it isn't your fault. But if you don't plan on failing, if you're willing to take control of your life and actually succeed, you'd better be ready to accept that you're in charge. And yeah, that means that if something goes wrong you fucked up. Get in a car crash and fail an exam because you missed a month of school? I don't give a shit if you were blindsided, it's your fault. You should have studied harder, even in the hospital.

College/university isn't that hard. What it is is a time suck (for some programs - some are both easy and not time consuming, but they don't tend to pay).

Let me tell you a story. University engineering class, hard class. Hardest class of the semester - statics. Went to every lecture, did all the homework, understood all the concepts. Ran out of time in the midterm. Straight up just ran out of time - I wasn't fast enough. I was getting the answers fine, but I was working too slowly. What the hell are you going to do? I guess I couldn't just skate by by understanding the materials and going to class. So for the final I took a different approach. I did every practice question available the day before the test. (It would be better to space this out over several weeks, but bear with me.) Then, I showed up to the university two hours before the final and did another five questions. Aced the thing.

Our brains work by identifying patterns. The more we're exposed to the pattern, the faster our brain works. This is why you can have two people who know how to read, but if one of them's read 300 more books than the other they'll be able to read faster - their brain's had more exposure to those patterns. It's the same with school - you need to do the practice questions, write the practice examines, constantly be exposing your brain to patterns it can latch onto.

Alright, so that's school. Lots of repetition and boring work, sounds shitty. And it can be - in engineering I was getting five hours of sleep every night and had no social life to get a good GPA, despite being the top of my class and grade in high school without any effort. But if you're okay with a passing grade, or you aren't in as challenging a program, you can definitely have a social life.

But again, you have to balance what you're doing and be sure to stay in control, if you want to be responsible for your success.

This means that you can't binge on drinks or drugs - they take control out of your hands. It's drunken you who's able to get chicks, not real you. It's adderall you who's able to pass tests, not real you. Sure, some people will argue that results are all that matters. But I think we've seen that your results so far have been shit - it's time for a new strategy.

Take control, take responsibility, and adapt to the fact that you can't fall back on old crutches anymore. Stop looking for shortcuts and understand that you're going to get results that are proportional to the work you put in - and this goes for school, work, game, and fitness. And it may be a slow process, it will test you. I'll tell you straight up, I think you'll fail. At something, anyway. But when you fail, I hope that you take responsibility for it. If you do, that failure will only last for as long as you let it last.

harkrank · 2017-01-14T15:53:40+00:00

Look into LSD to clear your mind and get a look deep inside.

dezrambson · 2017-01-14T15:28:21+00:00

You gotta get addicted to good shit so you don't even have time to get addicted to anything else, and you won't do things that might fuel a downward spiral. If you try something and you don't get addicted to it, drop it and try another healthy, positive hobby until something sticks. I have an addictive personality too, you gotta use it to your advantage.

Also think this is relevant oddly enough, and might help some: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atnt58L7xPk

syrinj · 2017-01-14T16:22:34+00:00

Recovering addict (6 years) here. Same story here. Hit a 12-Step Program or something (see "No More Mr. Nice Guy" for why). You think you have self-awareness but you actually don't because self-investment is a byproduct of gaining self-awareness AND vice-versa. Self-investment (lifting like you do already, doing interesting shit, reading books, finding hobbies, travelling, focusing on money, JOURNALING, etc.) gives confidence, among alot of other things that give you value. You're all surface traits right now and you're feeling it viscerally. You feel lost because you are.

You've squandered your time on women when they shouldn't be the top priority. Drugs/alcohol made them seem even better. Then you couldn't have one without the other. Then the drugs/alcohol stopped working. Liquid courage is not the same as game. Then when they're both gone, your identity went with them. Why? Because you made those two things your identity. That's where you invested, and anyone on TRP can tell you the dangers of making anything other than your identity your main priority.

You don't need to find your identity again, you need to build it. Some will say monk mode, some will say MGTOW (no because women aren't the problem, you are), but I say you need to relearn to keep identity first, all else second.

mokzhiguang · 2017-01-14T18:00:57+00:00

Ive had the same problem. Stop with the stimulants as your brain is like a candle , you only have so much wick. Once you burn out you start losing yourself , im sure you feel the effects already. Fortunately for you there is a cure. Marijuanna actually soothes and undoes the damage done by stimulants. Do your own research and try different types of marijuanna and figure out which one fixes you.

vagbutters · 2017-01-14T23:35:54+00:00

You sound like a typical addict, and you need to learn self control. Focus your efforts on seriously advancing your career and bettering your mind and body. Ditch the drugs, and do not fucking look back at them. Unless you have terminal cancer or some morbid illness, they won't help your quality of life. Women will come as you better yourself, but don't forget that pussy is just a small part of a man's life. You're in it to live a good life, not to live the illusion of one where you get short bursts of pleasure.

tempjewman · 2017-01-15T00:59:59+00:00

Bro you need to ask yourself why you're in college. If you want a degree in a field of interest, stop partying. No more going out to bars, no more hanging out with those toxic people who only want to party. Go cold turkey and start focusing on your education. Read up monk mode, because you most definitely need to start it with respect to studying and developing a healthy, sustainable lifestyle.

I would go out multiple nights per week and binge drink excessively.

Why? Is it external pressure from the people you're around? Do you feel bored and want to have fun?

During university, I focused too much on school. It ended with me having a degree with a decent GPA and a job lined up before graduating. If I were to redo it, I would focus on networking, improving communication and social skills, getting in excellent shape, and studying smarter. But I can do that shit now, while making cash.

If you have an actual drug problem, seek professional counselling. If its just a bad hobby, learn to become more disciplined. Exercise is a great way to not only have a healthier body and mind, but a quality way to spend time. It will help you become more disciplined in all aspects of life. I hope this somehow helps you. Report to us in a month with your progress.

wiseprogressivethink · 2017-01-15T04:20:03+00:00

Please define "shit personality" and "no personality." Those are both very vague, and anyway are two completely different things.

Based on what you wrote, a 12-step program and/or rehab sounds like a good first step. But it's difficult to say based on the lack of details provided in your post.

drmundro · 2017-01-15T06:17:46+00:00

I used to be an irresponsible party animal like you too.

Living a hedonistic lifestyle will never make you happy. If you want to start everyday feeling proud of who you are then you need to start respecting yourself a lot more and put hard work into things that matter. The pride you get with success blows taking drugs out of the water.

Ease up on the drugs and drinking. Your addictive personality will hinder you if that is your focus in life. Instead find something constructive to get addicted too. In my case I got addicted to gym and martial arts.

As for the girls... Girls like winners not losers so start focusing on winning in life.

Potato_God_Official · 2017-01-15T12:49:04+00:00

Research mgtow and youll be all set bud good luck.

arthurabyssal · 2017-01-15T22:03:26+00:00

You need to switch on your masculinity, tenacity, sense of self worth.

Do a 14 day fast. No you won't die. But you should find a sort of self-dependence you did not ever know you had. It will also rewire your brain to enjoy pleasure more, give you something to talk about to make you seem deep and self-controlled. You won't lose muscle don't worry (growth hormone protects it). No drugs or caffiene. Once you learn to rely on your own body and willpower you realise how anazing you are as a human.

smilingbanana · 2017-01-14T18:40:50+00:00

This post needs more views. Because there are things in the Manosphere that are not discussed, but should be.

I did similar thing. Found Trp and learned some new principles. I wasn't bed before, competitive lifter with low body fat, handsome face and lot of skills. I was dating miss of my country even before TRP.

I'm not sure if I had smth wrong from Manosphere or not, however I started to want more. I left my home in Eastern Europe and found great job in Western Europe. And a flat in the center of a metropolis city with crazy night life and tens thousand students.

Started to make great money, build even more muscles. In this period od four years (24-28) I thought I'm living the dream - young, successful, major city, and I was pulling left and right. There simply isn't sexual fantasy I didn't fulfilled in this 4 years. I had great social circles, and I was also rocking at the job. When I was tired, I used combination of drugs and supplements to keep going. Lot of money was spent on luxury, some cocaine and bitches.

Few months ago I noticed something is wrong..when I decided to calm down a bit and enter LTR. I realised my personality is fucked up. Without all the lifting and supps I don't have even erections I can trust. I am partially unable to maintain to maintain ltr because I lost part of humanity from myself. Sex becomed boring and libido is low, I guess that happens when you fuck circa 100 women, many of them above 7.

I over did everything. I got things wrong. This 4 years are not completely wasted, I guess it was better then if I was social retard, I learned new language and made fine improvements to my portfolio. Also social skills and confidence is great, and I don't have to worry if I missed on these things. Also managing chicks is ridiculously easy (but it was for me also before manosphere) except I'm struggling with ltr. What I am sorry about for real, is money. Now when I spend what normal people spend, I feel urge to sit and cry. Enough money in this 4 years that I could straight buy good sport car for cash.

I feel everything will be good. Maybe it was too much testosterone, money, and freedom for me at the time.

I think many guys over Manosphere are doing similar thing, thinking they are Gods because they look scary muscular, fucking whores and so on..I hope to see this issue discussed among guys.

Now I wish that my dopamine receptors are back, because I think that's the reason my libido is fucked. Last week chick was in front of me in lingerie and I was limp, and it's scary.

Pm if you want to write.

MyLittlePonyofDoom · 2017-01-15T04:29:15+00:00

Don't go mgtow join the Marine Corp instead. Going back to college will just ensure you relapse into idiot behaviour patterns and weakness

TheYoungOwl_ · 2017-01-14T18:40:11+00:00

Quit being a bitch asking for handouts, with your physical stats you have potential. Read the sidebar and learn this shit on your own you lazy fuck.

Title	Hit rock bottom. Starting form scratch. Need help badly.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	25
Comments	39
Date	January 14, 2017 1:43 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/5nxh9p/hit_rock_bottom_starting_form_scratch_need_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/hit-rock-bottom-starting-form-scratch-need-help.39998 https://theredarchive.com/post/39998

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