How my ex changed after break-up

gonorealover · 2016-05-29T14:09:19+00:00

Besides all that I suspect a big reason she is doing it is to prove you wrong in her head. Since everyone in the circle knows you broke up she assumes you are talking shit about her to them. By showing up and being pleasant this is her way of making sure your friends think you are an asshole for talking shit. I assume you don't even talk about the relationship with them so this is all in her head.

PM_ME_UR_HOT_PIXELS · 2016-05-29T17:39:47+00:00

I've had this happen to me. After our break up we shared a few friends (around 10). They essentially took sides but for the 2 that didn't I pretended there was no drama. I commented on facebook posts, I invited them to hang out, etc.

She would scour our mutual friends posts to make sure she "liked" or commented first. I treated it like I didn't care, she on the other hand would never touch a post if I liked or commented on it.

Eventually one of my personal friends died due to pancreatic cancer, he wasn't her friend but was a friend of a mutual friend. I went to his funeral and low and behold she was there!

Funny thing is his first name was "Gary" but everybody called him by his middle name which happened to be his father's name. In fact he considered it an insult to be called by his first name because he hated his mother who named him and other drama related to that.

Friends and I were talking about stories of him and even tho "Gary" was on the official designations nobody called him that. She jumps into the convo and says "Why aren't you guys talking about Gary? PM_ME_UR_HOT_PIXELS you should be ashamed"!

Everybody stared at her, 4 different people screamed at her over her disrespect and his father overheard this, knew she was trying to implant herself for attention, grabbed her by the hair and dragged her out of the church. She threatened to call the cops but everybody said "all we saw is a crazy chick trying to steal Gary's watch on his death bed".

She deleted every mutual friend off facebook a day later.

blackchadthundercock · 2016-05-29T09:10:29+00:00

You said it yourself, she's approaching the wall.

She's provider hunting. Pump & dump only.

RedStar19 · 2016-05-29T13:07:15+00:00

Why are your friends hanging out with your ex?

They probably want to get in her pants -> they're not real friends

MattyAnon · 2016-05-29T14:21:16+00:00

What can you analyze from this story if you read it with the Red-Pill lenses?

She sounds awful.

After you dumped her, she's trying to find her next option by using your social circle to find him. When she's got him, she'll do her best to cut him out of it. It's like joining a cult. Many men fall for it.

Bielzabutt · 2016-05-29T14:21:24+00:00

[permanently deleted]

CUNTRY · 2016-05-29T17:27:55+00:00

You're friend should definitely stop inviting her anywhere with you. Fuck that.

bsutansalt · 2016-05-29T15:47:52+00:00

Two questions that need to be answered quickly or this thread may end up locked:

1. Do you have a theory that would explain why this happened?

2. Have others experienced this kind of phenomenon?

I've personally witnessed this with an ex, but only just once. The rest all kept their own social circles and stopped hanging out with the joint one we had. This brings me to another question, does she not have friends of her own not in that joint social circle?

Moolg86 · 2016-05-29T18:06:32+00:00

your girl might be a homie hopper

Areu4realm8 · 2016-05-29T18:37:01+00:00

she wants your friends to convince you to get her back

Theophagist · 2016-05-29T21:33:20+00:00

I believe women actually mirror their men. If he's not giving her leadership and actively molding her personality she's going to mirror her interpretation of him, leading to all sorts of wacky behavior.

2016-05-29T22:23:34+00:00

My theories.

She wants your friends to see her in a good light in case you bad mouth her. Women do that. They want to control the narrative. Look at Jonny Depp. Bitch divorces him after his mom dies, demands to be paid for life, and suddenly he is an abusince druggy alcoholic.

Chat with your friends and confirm they are still YOUR friends. Bitches are quick to ruin bonds.

Speaking of bonds. If you aren't careful you will ...awe fuck it I'm gonna get to the point.

She has no fucking business socializing with your crew. She needs to go. In serious. It's just gonna breed bad bullshit and she is gonna cause you more headache.

You broke it off for a reason. Why the fuck are you still forced to see her regularly?

darkrood · 2016-05-30T16:54:01+00:00

Here is how I see it: she feels lonely.

If you have loads of chads, tons of other fun groups try to win your presence. Why on God's earth would you stick with your ex's social group?!!

Right now, her vulnerable feeling pushes her to stick to your group. This will lead to only two scenarios if she did not get claimed by others:

Your buddy in group ends up fucking her.
She gradually becomes part of the group. That you will see her more than you wish for.

Either way, change is coming~~<

MGHOW_ATL · 2016-05-29T19:18:32+00:00

She's gonna carousel fuck your friends. Better nip this in the bud, you will save friendships and maybe a friend from serious entanglement.

polakfury · 2016-05-29T14:02:38+00:00

Women behave how you allow them to behave.

2016-05-29T18:12:40+00:00

She wants to fuck your friends. Why not, its almost fair game.

markstachow · 2016-05-29T19:31:39+00:00

Simply because she isn't over you and hurt.

Venenarium · 2016-05-29T15:58:07+00:00

Sounds exactly like my ex.. Wow.

I had pretty beta frame when I was with her though and would blow off going to cool events (local bands, friends houses for parties, etc..). Oftentimes when I'd go without her, it felt miserable cause I wanted her company while I was there.

Like your ex, mine also wanted to do nothing except cuddle, watch tv shows/movies, and smoke weed (Which I liked doing a lot don't get me wrong.. Just not all the time). I'd try to go to museums and other cool date stuff with her but it felt like dragging a little kid along who didn't want to be there. I also used to play in rock bands and she'd never want to come to my gigs or if she did, she'd want to leave immediately after my band played.

I think what kept me in the relationship for so long was that she truly seemed to "love" me and was even by my side during my most cringy beta moments. She also cooked some bomb ass food and was pretty good in bed.. Although, she eventually dumped me for a higher SMV guy who was banging her best friend.

I think this is mostly cause I fell out of love with her and stopped wanting to have sex.. Her behavior just got me so irritated I didn't find her attractive anymore even though she had a really nice physique. So it's natural she'd go get it somewhere else I suppose.

But like you, after we broke up she started going out to the bar with my friends (we were all mutual friends, but I introduced her to them) and showing up at random events that I'd usually go to. It was kind of awkward but I just ignored her and her new guy the whole time and still managed to have a good time.

I would say that your girlfriend is just trying to branch swing. She seems like my ex who's also a boyfriend girl. A good sign of this is boyfriend girls usually don't have many female friends.. Or maybe 1 or 2. They're usually homebodies who don't go out much. She probably wants to meet a dude who she can settle with and is trying to correct the issues she had in your relationship.

play_time_is_over · 2016-05-30T08:23:42+00:00

Lol I have gone almost the exact same thing as you.

When we where dating she was lazy and never kept her social commitments. I always tried to introduce her to more of my life. She got super super nasty towards the end of the relationship so I ended it.

Now she's texting friends to hang out she would have never spoken to in a million years and every event I go to she seems to be there.

I think it happens for 2 reasons:

She's bored and lonely as fuck.

Yes hot girls can be lonely too if they're not around their "Sister hood". It amazed me that 2 years in a new city and she hasn't made a single friend that lasted 3 months. Everyone at uni knows she's crazy and no guys speak to her. She's joined 89 meetup groups since we broke up and she's hitting up people I know who she never had the human decency to respond to before.

She isn't letting go yet.

She still thinks she has a chance to get me back. That's why she goes to events she knows I will be at. She seems to make sure she talks to the most attractive guy (after me ofc) but it's futile - she has nothing I want.

Give it 3 months and she won't know you exist. The scary girls are the ones you friendzone and 2 years later they still want you to make a move.

2016-05-30T16:49:03+00:00

Similar example, my ex changed after I dumped her, she became a stripper, briefly came crawling back after she left her next bf, I eventually cut it off w/her for good when I met someone else. (we were being open at the time).

She moved to Detroit shortly after that, haven't seen/heard from her since.

BudTrip · 2016-05-29T16:22:03+00:00

this is legit, proof-free, golden wrapped feminine BULLSHIT.

something of a similar nature happened to me: recently separated (not from me) girl hangs out with me and the remaining company (late hours). We' are all a bit boozed. I create a fun environment as i'm always capable of: I got this shy friend and i was sending texts through his phone to a girl that just added him on facebook. Being the natural sweet talker i lead the conversation to sex and the girl shows a somewhat positive response.

I did this for the fun vibe and also to pull my friend out of his shell, i knew i wasn't gonna score him a girl.

Long story short, the girl of the story get attracted to me, starts with calling me a "player" to which i was stone cold (no sign of being affected) and then grabbing my hair and we end up making out. She was resistant to my moves, even though she was touching me buuut i ended up holding a titty because i'm a playa; especially when i'm a bit boozed.

Text her the next day to go for a brief walk. NOW HERE'S THE MISTAKE I MADE: i used the same humor i was using when we were kissing while hot and boozed. Her emotions had shifted and she kindly refused. Mistake from my part and big lesson here, think about being relatable.

A few days later me and my friends (9 dudes) had sceduled to go see captain america civil war (bomb movie) and she CAME with us. Ofc it was like we had done nothing, textbook BULL! I was chill, although low-key irritated. Didn't talk to her again, choose to pursue other girls just for the fact that we was not that attractive.

I understand having a short fling in a drunken haze, but she had to come to the movies with us? She's not even a close friend to our circle.

what i make out of this: it's a defense mechanism. When cornered, people spot the most emotionally safe route and go there.

2016-05-29T19:21:26+00:00

You got yourself a 'going to be stalker'. She is crazy. Get out as far as you can.

NomNomYoMomma · 2016-05-29T20:22:56+00:00

Arguing or interpersonal fights occur between two or more people that are at the same level. Siblings fight, friends argue, teammates as well. A parent doesn't argue with a child because they do not stack up, you are MY child. A boss doesn't argue with an employee, you are MY employee.

Same goes for LTR. Your woman should not equate herself to you. She is your woman. This does not mean you control her life, or do some dictator shit. You are her leader and shouldn't abuse that power. But that also means that she shouldn't be allowed to bring "problems" to your attention with aggression, loud tones, and anger. You have to shut that shit down early and create that respect. If you truly fucked up by your own standards then own up to it. But don't let her drag you into a screaming match or even think about having an argument with you in the first place.

2016-05-29T22:28:44+00:00

You've identified parts of it yourself. She has no social circle of which to speak. Going out with you and meeting your friends have her access to a social circle. She was upset that she couldn't control you, so you got the ice cold bitch mode.

Now, she is out prowling for the next sucker. She isn't acting like an ice cold bitch because it won't earn her what she wants, and she knows it. Instead, she is using the soft cell within the group of people that she knows.

mugatucrazypills · 2016-05-30T01:46:01+00:00

Funny, ... if a man did what you describe her doing he could expect a restraining order or criminal stalking charges to fall on him at any time.

Title	How my ex changed after break-up
Author	Venenarium
Upvotes	127
Comments	65
Date	May 29, 2016 8:41 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/4ljqw7/how_my_ex_changed_after_breakup/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/how-my-ex-changed-after-break-up.59489 https://theredarchive.com/post/59489

Comments

1. Do you have a theory that would explain why this happened?

2. Have others experienced this kind of phenomenon?