From the moment of your first interaction with any girl, everything you do sets the tone for all future interactions; it's very hard to backpedal from any act/practice the moment you do it the first time. Think of a BP guy in a stale LTR (where his girlfriend doesn't respect him anymore and walks all over him) who suddenly wants to assert himself and reclaim his manhood -- it's a Sisyphean task.
I'm very, very careful whenever I interact with a new girl (my avenue is Tinder, it's the most efficient and effective way to meet women for me). Here are a few examples where I try my best not to start off on the wrong foot:
1. I almost never pick her up. She drives or Ubers.
I think this is often overlooked by many guys. You pick her up the first time, she expects chauffeur service whenever you guys hang out in the future. Even if she drives, the moment you try to change this established dynamic she'll be turned off. Imagine making four trips each time you hang out: a) you pick her up, b) you drive to your place, c) you drive her back, d) you drive back to your place. Fuck that.
2. Whenever she texts me for attention/validation (e.g. venting, being depressed, bragging about having a drunk night out, etc.), I ignore her texts. No replies whatsoever
You reply, you encourage her, and she sees you more and more as an emotional tampon/venting avenue, a role to be fulfilled by one of her beta orbiters. NEVER give a woman undue attention or validation; they'll only see you as emotional beta bucks.
3. No dinners/cinemas/dates whatsoever, those I'll dispense at my discretion
I made the mistake of bringing out girls on proper dinner dates earlier in my dating days. I think it's a mistake. It establishes the wrong dynamics, it's as if I'm going out of my way to pay for the awesome privilege of her company when, in reality, I know I'm the life of the two-person party, not her. She should be awed by my presence, not the other way round. This is not a reframe; this is a fact -- most girls are boring as shit. I'm the interesting one.
The good thing about starting a date at my house the first time is that there's no pressure whatsoever to have "normal" dates "like we used to." We never had those. In fact, with my newer fuck buddies, it'd even be awkward to go on a proper date with me because we've never done that; the only non-awkward thing would be for her to come over and fuck. See what I did there?
Also, I now only do dinners if they've somehow earned it. If I did a dinner from the get-go, trust me, she immediately sees me as beta bucks. There's very little turning back from there, even if I did fuck them afterwards. How do I know? My older fuck buddies always expect a proper dinner date before fucking... I know then I fucked up.
4. No phone calls whatsoever
I hate phone calls. Anytime a chick calls me (apart from logistics like "I'm here, where are you?"), I ALWAYS let it go to voice mail. I know it would set up a very bad precedent if I answered her call once and spent my time listening to her babble like I've nothing better to do. First, it destroys my mystery. Second, she'll see me as emotional beta bucks, a go-to safe space when she's bored/sad/angry. Fuck that.
5. I never ever talk about work, how much I make, my finances, investments, etc.
Bad, bad precedent... Any chick asking excessively about that is looking for beta bucks. I shut that down very quickly with a "with all due respect, that's none of your business." I despise being profiled as beta bucks, and I'll nip it in the bud.
6. Never play ball when she dispenses sex as a reward or withholds sex as a punishment
I used to date this girl. For some reason, she wanted to know my last name (none of her business). I flat-out refused to tell her. She pulled this on me: "Well we won't have sex anymore unless you tell me your last name." Big mistake. How dare she assume that she's my only sexual option? (At that time, I was on a roll, banging 2-3 new chicks every week (was 50+ in my lay count).)
I just matter-of-factly told her, "That's fine." And then I hard-nexted her. There were way too many red flags with her anyway. After two weeks of silence, she texted me, "Maybe we started off the wrong foot. May I suggest that we remove sex and be friends and start over?" To hell with that! Ignored her text of course...
I think precedents are very important if you foresee a mid-to-long-term relationship with a girl, because they affect her perception of you. And her perception of you directly affects the ease with which you will sleep with her.
For those who're also mindful of setting bad precedents, what are some precedents that you always set with girls?
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