Summary: Most of you are average. That means a little work will give you some decent returns. Some lifting, some better clothes, a little practiced social grace. There's nothing complicated about it. Most of you aren't old school Louis Cyr and absolutely none of you are as smart as you think you are (why else would you have fucking ended up here?) - and that's ok.

But those niggling little egos keep saying:

"Why aren't you? Why aren't you?"

You've convinced yourselves that the world demands you be the top nacho, that women will only ride a greased up Mr. Hyde, and that you're worthless unless you own 10 businesses and get blow jobs while you're parasailing naked into the sunset.

And it's not like that at all.

My theory is that this is just years of you beating yourself up and failing shit tests. Women really really need to know that you're ok with who you are. So they'll dig at you with, "Why aren't you doing this? Why aren't you pursuing this? Why don't you do this?" And when you're a pussy you respond with excuses or you try to change yourself to look better in their eyes.

You fail.

You don't laugh. You don't respond with amused mastery. You don't kiss her to shut her up and slap her ass. You get sweaty, scared, and spend the next six months trying to become the man you think she will accept. You. Fail.

I've known some fantastic people who died when they were 19 or 23 - absurdly young ages, absurdly short amount of time on this planet.

Did they have TRP? No.

Did they enjoy their lives or their bodies or their lovers and friends any less than I enjoy mine? No.

Were they tested any more or less than me? Besides the dying part, no.

In every social situation, in every romantic situation, in every room they occupied with other human beings they simply had the choice to exercise the willpower to express what they desired, and the choice to pursue what they desired honestly and sanely. Like you and me, these people who had decades less time and experience, who never read a RP blog or talked to Rollo or broke a PR, could choose to enjoy life at any moment of any day without needing to compare themselves to arbitrary tests set forth in-the-moment by someone who is just teasing them.

  • When you have a huge ego, you take everything personally.

Get therapy or read some Buddhist texts (The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, Shambala: Path of the Warrior, Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism) if you want to squash that ego. The easiest way I've found is to just admit you've got the problem and find friends and lovers who will playfully tease you.

This is also necessary if you want to form an emotional bond with anyone, women included. If you take everything personally, you will never be comfortable. If you're never comfortable, no one around you will ever be comfortable either. To get comfortable, you need to smile and banter and allow yourself to just be. You do in fact need a safe space, sorry to say.

And you can't do that if you take everything as a challenge and come away from simple ephemeral interactions with 10 unattainable goals that you think will one day maybe make you acceptable to some person you met at a bar.

Lesson: If you do the work - the lifting, the approaching, reading, take some time to not take it seriously. Your ego will try to attach to the goals/guidelines/rules and it will dehumanize you and the people you could care about. Having your self-worth attached to a simple mistake like, "Oh no, I admitted a feeling to this girl - I'm a pussy who will never get her aroused ever again!" is just miserable bullshit. We're all in the same boat, all with insecurities and shortcomings. The ultimate courage and ultimate bravery as anyone (especially women who shit test) will tell you, is in enjoying yourself and having a sense of humor with the full knowledge that you are, even with daily lifting regimens and the best diet and rock solid friends/mentors, just an average human being.