Need advice on whether I should break things up or talk it out with with him

hashtaggoodvibesonly · 2020-06-03T20:39:05+00:00

Dump. He's going to keep finding websites to do it on and using the excuse of 'oh I didn't think it would apply to THIS one too'. Dump. Dump. Dump

pumpernick3l · 2020-06-03T22:12:10+00:00

Girl, if you ask this question on FDS the answer is always going to be “dump him”. You know what you need to do.

throwawayitst · 2020-06-03T20:44:07+00:00

Yuck. Either he changes or you leave. Theres no shortage of better men. My ex barely used sm, and he barely followed girls but there was this one girl he liked a couple photos of including one with cleavage and i told him it was insulting and to unlike it and he did. I kind of regret doing that because it was a one off thing and it was because of a funny caption (in french, I didn’t know) but he understood why that would look bad for me

Capable_Okra · 2020-06-03T21:31:20+00:00

If he actually cared about how you felt, he wouldn't need to be told which websites to stop following. You would have stated your feelings and he would have understood that Twitter specifically wasn't the problem.

VikingPug · 2020-06-04T00:01:09+00:00

When you start out the post saying it’s been hard I would advise you to leave. This never ends well. It’s emotional labor and taxing on you. Get out. Leave, block. This is coming from someone with a lot of experience.

You’re feeling crazy because you’re doubting your own intuition. Listen to your gut.

West-Cook · 2020-06-03T23:12:13+00:00

Need advice on whether I should break things up or talk it out with with him

99% of the time if you have to ask, the answer dump him.

Sooooo I’ve been together with this guy for a year and it’s been hard 🙃.

Relationships shouldn’t be hard. They are work, yes, but they shouldn’t be difficult.

Most of the time we’re good but his social media habits issues comes up every now and then, and honestly it just gives me a lot of anxiety and doubt that I feel bad about my feelings most of the time.

Take your anxiety and doubt as gut instinct.

So he likes to follow and like photos of Instagram girls. He used to do it on Twitter as well but stopped after I caught him doing it. I didn’t explicitly tell him to stop on Instagram but isn’t it common sense? He’s not on the extreme end but he still likes some photos of suggestive photos and it’s been an issue for me that I’ve told him so many times that I’m wondering if I should just give up on him.

He knows you don’t like it. You have explicitly asked him to stop. And he doesn’t.

I also found out he was jacking off to them after I spotted a few photos on his album when he was scrolling though them... he immediately stopped when I flipped the script and asked him how he would feel if I was saving pics of dicks on my phone and using them though 🙃

I think it goes without saying that he shouldn’t even have to be told something like that. Because not only is he disrespecting you and your explicit requests, it’s a no brainer for human empathy. This man is a porn addict.

There are other issues as well that suggests to me has wandering eyes but from what I’ve seen so far with his attitude towards his family and friends, he’s not the type to cheat but he just has this habit that I’m not sure if guys can stop???

You’re right, guys with wandering eyes cannot stop this habit. However, there are guys who don’t have wandering eyes. You deserve someone like that.

Anyway, would appreciate some advice cause I feel like I’m going crazy and I have no one else to speak to about this lol.

You’re not crazy! You are entirely reasonable.

thedragonwithinxo · 2020-06-04T00:25:59+00:00

You need to listen to your intuition. Your feelings and your rational mind will try to get in the way of your intuition. I highly recommend meditating so that you hear your intuition clearly.

You. Are. Not. Crazy. This shit has been so normalized in our society and so many women fall for it because they fear they are overreacting/being too sensitive. We have been conditioned to think this way. Wake up. This a program to make you be subservient to sexually impulsive men.

There are so so sooooo SO many men out there who have taken back their power and reclaimed their sexuality because they see through the bs conditioning and programming that society has ingrained in us in terms of sex.

Sexual energy is the most powerful energy out there. That is why it is sold to us through the mass media such as social media, TV, Ads, food, movies, etc. HIGH VALUE MEN see through this BS and awaken themselves to the truth.

HIGH VALUE MEN would never ever EVER let these Instagram models take away their precious life force energy. They see it for what it is. Fake af.

Period.

Oh and dump him. He ain’t the one.

MommaGypsy · 2020-06-03T23:17:55+00:00

It's obviously not the platform of choice that is the real issue here. He is using photos of Other women (some who could be underage wether he knows it or not) to get off. You already know he would Not be ok if you turned the tables. You already set your boundaries and he's chosen to ignore them. You already know what you need to do. Either respect yourself and leave(or don't and continue to lower your self-love and respect and end up truly miserable). This will not be the last time he ignores a boundary.

em0873 · 2020-06-04T02:08:39+00:00

If you’re having these issues the first year of your relationship, think about how it’ll be 2, 5, 10 years from now. He should be still on his best behavior at this point and NOT looking at other women on social media especially after you’ve expressed that you don’t like it. I say dump. There are a lot of guys out there who don’t do that, or who do it single but would gladly stop doing it if they knew it would make you happy. Don’t settle for a guy who follow insta thotties.

socalqueenofcheese · 2020-06-04T03:40:00+00:00

DTMFA, Dump the mother fucker already, as Drew Savage says. You sound like his mom too. Having to tell your man to stop jerking it? 🤢Good luck! Move on. Level up

divdec · 2020-06-04T13:39:40+00:00

Dump him. There’s nothing to talk about. He knows how you feel and he’s ignoring it. There ARE men in existence who don’t feel the need to lust after provocative photos. We’re just so used to LVM being the norm that we accept this immature behavior as par for the course. Dump him and pick your standards back up. It might take you a while to meet someone who meets your standards, but you need to think about your life in the long term. Think about your life 5, 10, 20 years from now. Do you want to be stuck with this? Maybe your boyfriend is not the worst guy in the world, but he’s not what you want and you know it. The longer you stay with him the longer you keep yourself from a better possibility. The sooner you break it off, the sooner you can get over him, work on yourself, level up, pursue your own interests, make new friends, maybe move to a new city, etc. I know staying in a relationship with a LVM can seem harmless, but honey you are wasting your TIME with this man. Time you will NEVER get back. Time you could be using for better things. All the time you spend trying to change him will yield nothing and even if he did change he can always change back. Men will go along with things to get a woman to get off their back, but unless he wants to change, it’s truly a wasted effort. He’s showing you what he would rather be doing. Believe him.

warinmymind94 · 2020-06-05T04:54:47+00:00

You asked him to stop with the girls and he did not and has not listened. That shows he will not listen to you and he does not care about you. Theres a million other reasons other comments have addressed but that's plain and clear to see. He doesn't respect or listen now so he never will. The good news is it's easy enough to dump him!

Title	Need advice on whether I should break things up or talk it out with with him
Author	idgafbwyt
Upvotes	13
Comments	12
Date	June 3, 2020 7:05 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gw0aft/need_advice_on_whether_i_should_break_things_up/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/need-advice-on-whether-i-should-break-things-up-or.674539 https://theredarchive.com/post/674539

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