[Interesting article] Sometimes, it’s better to be single. Love is political. Let’s not be blind to the way social expectations often play out in personal relationships. Never settle.

https://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life-and-relationships/laurie-penny-why-women-are-better-off-single-20170914-gyh5xd.html

”When I've spoken critically about this monolithic ideal of romantic love in the past, most of the pushback I've received has been from men, some of it violent, and no wonder. Men usually have far more to gain from this sort of traditional arrangement. Men are allowed to think of romantic love as a feeling, an experience, a gift that they expect to be given as a reward for being their awesome selves.

That sounds like a great deal to me. I wouldn't want that challenged.

Women, by contrast, learn from an early age that love is work. That in order to be loved, we will need to work hard, and if we want to stay loved we will need to work harder. We take care of people, soothe hurt feelings, organise chaotic lives and care for men who never learned to care for themselves, regardless of whether or not we're constitutionally suited for such work.

We do this because we are told that if we don't, we will die alone and nobody will find us until an army of cats has eaten all the skin off our faces.

There would be serious social consequences if we collectively refused to do the emotional management that being a wife or girlfriend usually involves – so it's important that we're bullied into it, made to feel like we're unworthy and unlovable unless we're somebody's girl.” - From the article.