Women who cheat

CoolMelonade · 2019-12-11T15:52:47+00:00

We don’t advocate that you commit fully period unless you’re on a marriage track.

m4dam3x · 2019-12-11T14:54:11+00:00

PEOPLE who cheat are trash. Deception for personal gain is never OK.

Edit: Wanted to clarify - dating multiple people is different than being supposedly “exclusive” with a person and seeking outside attention, dating on the side, or having sex with others.

ChristieFox · 2019-12-11T16:08:55+00:00

It all comes down to what you agree upon with a guy. If your strategy is "exclusivity only when we're engaged", then you're basically single / courting until he asks if you want to marry him - then please date as much as you want to. But if you agree to be exclusive, it becomes cheating because you lied about being exclusive. That in my opinion is low value behavior.

husheveryone · 2019-12-11T15:09:29+00:00

Cheating on a spouse or live-in partner to whom one has made a financial commitment, backed by a social contract, is low value behavior.

Having said that, NO RING, NO THING. Oops I shouted.

stillcantsee · 2019-12-11T16:26:35+00:00

Cheaters are low value. Building a relationship with another person before breaking up with your current partner is low value.

Being open about dating multiple people pre-exclusivity is key.

mydeepestinnerworks · 2019-12-11T15:56:37+00:00

I personally wouldn’t.

IcePrimcess · 2019-12-11T15:01:23+00:00

Until I’m married, I see who I want to see. I’m naturally monogamous, but I make no promises to a boyfriend. Single means single.

smg222888 · 2019-12-11T17:59:43+00:00

I cheated on my husband. I was miserable, under appreciated, overworked from being a mom and the breadwinner, completely sexually repressed and honestly really weak. I regret it, it all totally blew up in my face and i paid dearly for my mistakes. I am a human being who thought i could set aside all my needs for the sake of my family and i was wrong. I realize a lot of people will say that makes me low value and honestly i am ok with the judgements. I would have thought the same about other people until I was in the situation myself. All we can do is learn from our mistakes, try to do better. Level up by getting therapy & committing to never putting myself in that position again. What really got me was staying in a relationship that made me so unhappy. It turned me into something I am not.

I just wanted to put that out there because I am sure there are women like me reading this who already feel enough shame about their mistakes. You aren’t alone.

Scotsburd · 2019-12-11T17:32:12+00:00

No, when committed, HVW do not cheat.

Blackishcat27 · 2019-12-11T17:49:42+00:00

I personally think it's seriously low-value behavior.

lasolterita · 2019-12-12T01:27:52+00:00

Cheating = abominable. If you've committed, you've committed. To disrespect your own word is to demonstrate it doesn't have much worth

sveta68 · 2019-12-11T21:44:53+00:00

Until he puts a ring on it, you are single and can do whatever you want. Some men want to be in the dating stage forever which usually means they they are unsure about you and are just stringing you along until they can find someone better. So if they don't show you commitment, there's no reason to be faithful to them because chances are they're not being faithful to you either.

grimreapersdtr · 2019-12-11T17:49:59+00:00

Infidelity is an extremely nuanced issue.

I read The State of Affairs by Esther Perel (MY QUEEN) recently and my perspective on this has really transformed.

Men are fairly simple creatures and generally cheat because they desire variety, novelty or to regain autonomy and independence - reassertion of self. It certainly doesn't help if things aren't great at home but their emotional attachment to their partner doesn't play a significant role and they're able to separate their relationship from the subject of their lust.

However, women usually cheat due to neglect or dissatisfaction with their partner. It happens after multiple attempts have been made to rekindle the connection but with little success. Their partners aren't emotionally attuned to them, don't take them seriously, etc.

Essentially, it's ultimately an escape for both parties but with very different motivations.

Title	Women who cheat
Author	Betterthanev3r
Upvotes	12
Comments	19
Date	December 11, 2019 2:47 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/e97zwt/women_who_cheat/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/women-who-cheat.687107 https://theredarchive.com/post/687107

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