"Sorry i offended you" and "sorry for what i did" are two VERY different sentences and I really wish some women were more aware of this

2340000 · 2020-06-15T08:02:26+00:00

This is a great distinction. Men need to take responsibilityfor their poor behavior.

But if he gives you an apology, it doesn't matter, leave him🤷

highoncatnipbrownies · 2020-06-15T09:40:40+00:00

[deleted]

crazycraftylady · 2020-06-15T10:42:24+00:00

These were always the best and ONLY “apologies” I could get from my ex. I always explained how they weren’t apologies either. I don’t think he’s able to say the word sorry and mean it. My favorites were “sorry YOU think...” or “sorry YOU feel...” dick

ninetiesbaby16 · 2020-06-15T11:31:16+00:00

There are ladies out here getting faux apologies? Cos I couldn’t even get those 🥺

So this is actually probs something I need to hear because I’d probably fall for the “sorry you feel that way/got offended” lines because that’s an upgrade to what I’m used to.

m00n5t0n3 · 2020-06-15T20:17:52+00:00

Ladies I noticed that the "early signs of abuse" post in the handbook is empty/deleted!

understatedalways · 2020-06-15T08:38:27+00:00

Love this!

shade-of-daisy · 2020-06-15T10:26:23+00:00

YES! why is it my problem when you say something douchy!

Capable_Okra · 2020-06-15T17:50:55+00:00

https://www.inc.com/amy-morin/women-really-do-apologize-more-than-men-heres-surprising-reason-why-and-it-has-nothing-to-do-with-self-esteem.html

A study showed that men simply don't apologize because they don't think they're wrong. I used to get in constant fights with my ex because he would insist that "he didn't intend to hurt me and therefore he doesn't need to apologize"

2020-06-15T21:42:46+00:00

Broke up with my rebound guy last month because I didn't want a situationship and he asked what happened, and after I told him he said "I'm sorry you felt that way".. which made the whole thing way easier, so thanks for the gift of a non-apology Chris!

threatleveldaytime · 2020-06-15T15:25:22+00:00

My ex boyfriend used to say “sorry you’re upset.” He never apologized for his own actions, not even after cheating on me.

sadcello · 2020-06-16T18:34:20+00:00

Yes, it's called non apology. Other examples:

"I'm sorry you feel that way" (he's sorry for your feelings, not his actions)

"I'm sorry you take it that way" (he's not sorry for his actions, he's blaming you for taking it the 'wrong' way)

"My bad" (this usually means sorry but not sorry, he doesn't regret it and will do it again)

When he apologizes, always ask, "What are you sorry for/What are you apologizing for?" If his answer has anything to do with your feelings or actions, he's not sorry. Only accept apology where he apologizes for his actions, like for example, "I'm sorry for hurting you," "I'm sorry I lied to you."

Never accept anything less.

mycatpukesglitter · 2020-06-17T14:08:35+00:00

A couple weeks ago my boyfriend said I never accept his apology, I say I appreciate his apology instead. I didn’t realize I did this until he told me. I thought about it for a couple seconds and told him that he’s right, I don’t accept apologies, I appreciate them and will accept changed behavior.

bootyandthebeet · 2020-06-15T10:42:27+00:00

“I’m sorry you feel that way” is what my ex used to always say 🤦🏻‍♀️

AnnoirNevilly · 2020-06-15T13:48:44+00:00

That makes me so mad. The last one that happened to me, he said: " I apologize that you thought... "

OrchidLion · 2020-06-16T05:30:54+00:00

“I offended you” sounds like the speaker is taking responsibility for doing the offending.

Title	"Sorry i offended you" and "sorry for what i did" are two VERY different sentences and I really wish some women were more aware of this
Author	AspenGoddess
Upvotes	192
Comments	20
Date	June 15, 2020 1:08 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/h95xbf/sorry_i_offended_you_and_sorry_for_what_i_did_are/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/sorry-i-offended-you-and-sorry-for-what-i-did-are.691762 https://theredarchive.com/post/691762

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