Hey guys, 52 year old here. To the kids: I'm sure this is an unimaginably old age to you, but I assure you it comes up faster than you think.
I have 2 kids. One of whom hates me, and one of whom loves me.
When I was 25 (about the time a male's brain really comes online), I wanted to marry a woman who would be with me forever. I chose carefully--so I thought, and in 5 years we had a kid, and in another 2 years, we had another. We bought a house, had a riding lawnmower, all that shit. I loved her like crazy. I tried really hard to keep what I had, but the economy went south (2008), and after owning my own business, the best job offer I got offered was night stock boy at Target for $7.25 an hour. Part time.
I failed. I really fucking did. I didn't understand how women worked. And, consequently, she left me. I moved from a 4-bedroom house to a 2-bedroom apartment, and the extra shit that I brought along was still piled up in the living room. And my 2 kids moved along with me.
My son had to choose, spur of the moment, what could go with us and what had to get lost to the foreclosure guys. Same for my daughter. I would've given anything, sacrificed my own life, if they didn't have to make that choice. But they did.
Our apartment was next to the railroad tracks, so we got woken up by a train horn several times a night. I got a job as a Domino's pizza delivery guy, then as a temp at a warehouse, then as a full-time hire at a warehouse, then as a banker. We moved to a nicer apartment. I got a better car. Not a great car, but a better car.
But it still irreparably damaged my kids, as I was irreparably damaged my own parents' divorce.. For all of you here who are 16-25, I'd like you to know that your parents probably tried like helll to keep you from suffering from their own unavoidable downfall. And they probably failed at it.
Realize that they're human, and they make mistakes, and that they love you. Please.
After the divorce, I swore I'd never marry a woman again, until the kids were out of the house. I'd been under the sway of a cruel and wicked stepmom when I was a teen, and I never wanted that for my kids. I was content to live alone--much happier, actually, but I still couldn't undo the damage that had been caused.
I'd like to take this opportunity to slam my ex, but she did exactly what was in her nature. Just like the scorpion that stung the frog that took him across the river (look it up). It was half my fault for marrying her.
At the end of the day, the lesson is that your parents both love you, even though they're imperfect beings. No matter how much they try, they can't always pull off a miracle. And they're both sorry. But they are people too, and they try, in their own imperfect way, to make your life better. And sometimes they want to make their own lives beter, too.
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