My female boss often slaps or grab the butts of me (I’m male) and my female colleague when she is happy or approve our work. Is it normal?

Cripplenippleripple · 2020-02-17T12:30:53+00:00

It’s not normal at all

Dunkolunko · 2020-02-17T12:33:22+00:00

No, it's sexual assault.

BornFreeWE · 2020-02-17T12:35:08+00:00

Hell no. That is sexuall harassment by a superior.

That part of the answer is easy. It get's difficult if you ask how tho stop that...

Have you talked about that with your female colleague? If she has no problem with that it will get very difficult.

If she doesn't like it you can "team up". Be very carefull.

Perhaps start with saying that you don't like it while others are around to get witnesses.

Ironwarrior29 · 2020-02-17T12:32:27+00:00

Nope, record her doing it and report her ass.

TheStumblingWolf · 2020-02-17T12:56:14+00:00

This is what secretaries probably asked a lot in the 1960s. It was wrong then, and it's wrong now - regardless of gender.

Lion_amongst_gods · 2020-02-17T13:21:13+00:00

Not in any of the 14,000,605 parallel universes.

Collect evidence. Take legal action.

JamieA7Xfan · 2020-02-17T12:36:00+00:00

I would suggest reporting her to HR

TheGameMaster115 · 2020-02-17T13:08:42+00:00

That’s sexual assault try to make a complaint

LoneArcher96 · 2020-02-17T13:13:01+00:00

If you wanna know if it's normal or not, ask yourself what if it was the other way around, would she be happy if you suddenly grabbed her like that in any kind of a situation?.

The answer to that question is the same answer to yours.

Mollof2 · 2020-02-17T12:31:30+00:00

I don't think it's so common.

jinladen040 · 2020-02-17T13:56:57+00:00

If yoire having to ask if it's normal, its probably not normal. During the fifteen years at my current job, this has never happened.

FakeLaundry · 2020-02-17T13:51:50+00:00

Say nothing else to her. Film it. Get her fired.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2020-02-17T13:53:31+00:00

This is not normal.

MarsNirgal · 2020-02-17T14:35:43+00:00

How is this even a question?

Mythandros · 2020-02-17T19:30:40+00:00

It's not normal at all. Go to HR and report her. This is sexual assault.

tilfordkage · 2020-02-17T14:49:42+00:00

On one hand this is really common coming from people who played sports in the past. It is often harmless and good natured.

On the other hand, if you asked her to stop, she should have listened to you and respected your wishes.

LegendaryEmu1 · 2020-02-17T16:11:34+00:00

That would be sexual harassment, if you and your coworker have tried to tell her to stop, and she hasn't, either you go to HR or you can find somewhere, depending on your country, to basically say they are doing this.

LateralThinker13 · 2020-02-17T16:12:39+00:00

We talked to her but she answered: “ Ooh come on, it is just teaming up.”

My response: Please have everybody line up. All the women. I'm going to go down the line slapping all of your butts. If anybody complains, you can't do it to me. Period.

How about it?

ausgamer529 · 2020-02-17T17:59:20+00:00

Me too her ass

bastardbeard666 · 2020-02-17T22:56:05+00:00

Doesn’t matter whether it is normal or not. If it bothers you. It’s all that matters.

Remember it’s your body. It’s your choice whether you approve of anyone touching you.

Paper trail is important so somehow record you stating your ground on how you don’t appreciate being touched. There are other ways for team building and the reason is irrelevant.

DragonVT · 2020-02-17T12:55:30+00:00

Chandler?

BCRE8TVE · 2020-02-18T01:38:45+00:00

If the roles were reversed, how would it look like?

That's the best standard, and unfortunately often the most ignored.

If it wouldn't look ok for a man to do that to a woman, it shouldn't be ok for a woman to do it to a man either.

Jackson2615 · 2020-02-18T05:39:10+00:00

No its not normal, might be sexual assault & certainly sexual harassment. She is no doubt in breach of the company policies. She wants to have a grope of your ass and to make it look like its just a bit of fun , includes the women as well. If you were doing this to a woman , you'd be out the door so fast your head would spin.

Document each episode and make a formal complaint of sexual harassment to HR, and her supervisor.

SimpleQuantum · 2020-02-18T09:26:24+00:00

That’s sexual harassment. I suggest you talk to your colleague and both file reports

Svenskbtch · 2020-02-18T14:51:49+00:00

For someone that most of the time find these issues overhyped and wishes we would all just become better at developing a sense of humour, actually grabbing someone's butt crosses the line of professional behaviour even for me. You are fully within your right to state clearly how her behaviour comes across. Give her a chance to change her behaviour, and if she does not - take action. This is blatant enough even for a gynocentric system to support you.

If I only witnessed something like this, I would feel it is my obligation to take action, so the simple fact that nothing has happened yet seems indicative of a pretty toxic environment. I submit this for your consideration...

Break_Point_A · 2020-02-20T04:15:17+00:00

Record it while you ask her to stop, for enough times to provee it is continuous and non-concensual. Then go to the police

bubbajakeypup · 2020-04-30T20:07:29+00:00

It's a landmine field your walking in if it continues, people will lose their jobs and livelihoods if this continues, I got a female boss right now that's hands on and it's turning bad at this time.

KingTutWasASlut · 2020-02-17T13:16:23+00:00

Will you noballs stop asking questions you know the answer to?

pwinne · 2020-02-17T20:14:22+00:00

Is she hot?

Iceman290890 · 2020-02-17T14:17:42+00:00

I’ve had that happen many times. Feminists would be outraged if it was a man doing it. I brush it off and take it as a compliment. Exactly what women should do...

Title	My female boss often slaps or grab the butts of me (I’m male) and my female colleague when she is happy or approve our work. Is it normal?
Author	Ls1009
Upvotes	100
Comments	41
Date	February 17, 2020 12:25 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/f580qv/my_female_boss_often_slaps_or_grab_the_butts_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/my-female-boss-often-slaps-or-grab-the-butts-of-me.858747 https://theredarchive.com/post/858747

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