LTR wants to have a "talk", what to expect/how to handle it?

RPShitlord · 2017-03-22T13:24:18+00:00

Don't go to the fucking movies with this bitch and don't have any talks either. The relationship ended when she started texting her ex.

LaLongCarabine · 2017-03-22T11:54:46+00:00

Eject

alltrueism · 2017-03-22T13:24:49+00:00

"By the time you have the 'talk,' she's already planned her exit" -some guy that knows what he's talking about

Occams_Stubble · 2017-03-22T14:42:00+00:00

"..but it doesn't have to be." = "We can be friends."

Don't meet her. At most text her and say "We don't need to talk. We both know." Let her hamster away at just what it is you both know. For your part, you know she is not LTR material.

quicklogaccount · 2017-03-22T12:32:32+00:00

What kinda bs is awaiting me

Hard to guess. If I had to place a bet, it'd be on a "it's not that kind of love, we're friends but not meant to be a couple" justification from her, maybe coupled with accusing you of insecurity. But I wouldn't bet on anything, too many possibilities.

how should I handle this?

Ground rules remain the same. Don't explain yourself, don't make promises nor act on her shaming you with anything, don't offer comfort because she's demanding it, that sort of stuff.
If you can't figure out what to do on the spot, don't let her break under your skin. Tell her you need to think and leave. It beats telling her you were wrong and going back on your word.

GayLubeOil · 2017-03-22T13:07:46+00:00

She's going to break up with you and milk it for as much drama as possible. Women are mindless herd animals that repeat their television programming. Breakup Drama is a heavily programed behavior.

Option 1) Act like you don't care at all. Be apathetic. Bring a sandwich. Eat it casually and nonchalantly during her speach.

Option 2) Text her a picture of another girl in your bed. Claim that it is art. Ask her opinion. When she gets mad break up with her for having poor taste in art.

Option 3) Don't engage her drama do other shit.

[deleted] · 2017-03-22T12:31:08+00:00

http://i365art.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/oct-14.jpg

Aaren_Augustine · 2017-03-22T12:33:15+00:00

If you're smart, nothing. Its done. Why waste your time with a "talk". No need to give an explanation. Just next

donedreadpirate · 2017-03-22T14:51:21+00:00

Don't even bother going to this talk brother. Go have fun.

TheBlackAlistar · 2017-03-22T13:02:40+00:00

If she still loves him, she's willing to still jump on his dick. With my last gf, when we broke up for the first time, she ended up rebounding back to him a few days later, and told me one drunk night. My BP ass shouldn't have taken her back after that. Wasted a year of my life.

0kool74 · 2017-03-22T13:12:50+00:00

they texted each other that they still love one another

"btw we need to talk" and also added "I'd say it's rather not that good but it doesn't have to be" when asked about what.

What is awaiting you? My guess is that she's going back to her ex but wants to keep you around for orbiting, validation, LJBF etc. etc.

It's gonna suck for you, but when that comes, automatically NEXT and GHOST!!!!!

VasiliyZaitzev · 2017-03-22T16:25:50+00:00

No good conversation ever began with "We need to talk."

Shoulda shitcanned her over the rapprochement with the ex.

BTW, if you were spinning plates, or had multiple OLTRS, you wouldn't be watching 100% of your pussy supply walking out the door because she never got over her ex.

Tommy_407 · 2017-03-22T15:17:43+00:00

Take this advice from me. Believe it or not, it sounds like she's actually [in her mind] trying to be nice & cool about breaking it off w you, by allowing you guys to enjoy a movie before it all. It's fucked up but to her it's better than the usual text "were over, ex called last nite" that many young girls will do at this time in society.

Now. If you want to win this one, and really win, like a man, not be butthurt, just do this. It's going to burn a hole right through your soul as you keep the pain inside you, and at some point you may even cry in private, but the answer is to ghost her.

No call. No text. No closure.

Why? Because she gave you red handed proof with the "i love you" text to her ex. Just ghost her. Her hamster will be spinning forever and you as a man will gain discipline from having the balls to do it. It's not cruel to ghost someone. Not in this circumstance anyways.

CyanRangerDude · 2017-03-22T14:53:48+00:00

It's over. When she's talking to you keep a deadpan face, no reactions, and say "ok". Then move on.

It was over the moment she started texting him again to be honest and (just keeping it real), I'd be shocked if they haven't already met up and at least kissed to reclaim their so called "love". You don't need this shit from her and you're better than her. Just let it go and to be honest I would skip the movie. Why pay money and spend your time on her at this point when HER time is spent texting ex's.

Hard Next. Don't be passive. Steer the ship.

1Pink1Stink · 2017-03-22T16:29:30+00:00

Keep us updated OP. We can help if anything

FlexGunship · 2017-03-22T15:38:03+00:00

No matter what, if you want to come out on top then you need to

1) NOT

2) GIVE

3) A

4) SHIT

In that order. Don't be passive aggressive. Don't beg. Don't ask questions.

nombre1 · 2017-03-22T16:18:24+00:00

She's breaking things off. If you're interested in the movie, go, if not, just call her and let her know that when she realizes that nobody will every be the man that you are, she should look you up, maybe you'll be available for a movie. I used more or less these exact words, and got a call about 3 months later.

It's his turn again, maybe you'll get another turn later, if you're not needy & possessive.

wheresMYsteakAt · 2017-03-22T13:47:28+00:00

but it doesn't have to be

Because of this without any other context im betting it's "we should see other people"

phareux · 2017-03-22T15:36:00+00:00

Ghost her for a couple days, text her to come over and blow you. Rinse and repeat

Cunt_Robber · 2017-03-22T16:15:24+00:00

Think about yourself: how will this affect you? You have the power to choose how to let it affect you and how to react. Worst case scenario she dumps you.

Don't think of the relationship, of "us" or of the investment youve put in up to this point. Think you, and what's best for you. Because you can bet that's what she's doing.

Avoid drama. This stinks of drama. Don't get emotionally charged in any conversation. If she wants to leave let her, there's nothing you can say or do that will convince her to stay. If she brings up things from the past make note of them and how she used them to manipulate an argument in her favor. If they have little rational relevance to the topic(s) discussed, try to calmly clear the conversation of these past things by stating these things aren't pertinent to the topic at hand and only serve to confuse and distract.

She might try to shift blame on other persons or events. Let her, but observe, OBSERVE how she does it.

Whatever happens, if you pay attention you will learn a lot from this talk. Everything aside, keep doing you, set a frame, and don't break it. At this point I'd start seeing other girls regardless of outcome.

*one of my plates called it quits on me yesterday because I woudn't commit. Different than an LTR but if you set your life up in an RP way it shouldn't really phase you. Ended the call and went back to my work. It freed up a little time and one of my old friends is visiting town this weekend. Perfect.

the-bum-hammer · 2017-03-22T16:34:21+00:00

Just be done with her. Don't go to the movies. As I tell the slobs in the other sub, when a girl wants a break, it's because she's fucking someone else or just about to. No amount of denial on your part changes reality.

Don't give her the "magical closure" whe wants, where she can pretend to be the good guy in all this. Just... disappear.

[deleted] · 2017-03-22T18:10:22+00:00

There are no breaks in a RP relationship. You were already broke up. Ghost and block.

creepyThrowawayP · 2017-03-22T21:36:18+00:00

It's already over, you can expect to be put on the waiting list in the bull pen at best, don't take that shit at least have some fun and text her that you met someone during your break and if she asks what did you do tell her "not much". Have fun with her hamster and then ghost her out.

Colt42O · 2017-03-22T18:16:51+00:00

Bro you should've broken it off and stopped all contact once she admitted to talking to her ex and that they still love each other. It's over, ghost this girl

MattyAnon · 2017-03-22T18:53:32+00:00

Phone or text should be fine, doesn't need to be face to face.

You're on break. Looks like it might be an extended one. You don't wanna date someone texting her ex that they love each other.

ecosci · 2017-03-22T22:06:45+00:00

The talk means i love you but im not in love with you anymore with a touch of crocodile tears never be the beta back plan to a woman i bet she has already fucked and branch swinged to the other guy and blame you women are not loyal they only pretend to be angels.

walawalawa · 2017-03-22T23:27:22+00:00

OK...This is going to take massive discipline but...ghost her.

Delete, block, never ever respond to her.

Do NOT to her outreach. She will respond and react...

Don't do it. Disappear. I just had a similar situation and I never responded, went on a 3 week holiday where I was out of the country.

When I came back she still hadn't contacted me and stiffed me for a pair of handmade shoes she'd asked me to order from a craftsman friend of mine.

I sold the shoes. It's been nearly 3 months and I have seen her, she's contacted me with an angry note....I have NOT responded or reacted.

I went to a club the other night with an HB8 I had met the night before...ex was there....She was clearly pissed from the glimpse I caught of her face....and she was making a huge effort to parade guys in front of me...

I was having such a blast with the girl I was with I didn't notice beyond the way you would notice a fly buzzing around and you just ignore it.

The power you will gain from this is amazing.

Closure and conversation is for losers. Don't be a loser.

This ended when she reached out to another dude. Don't be a pussy.

I made the mistake of reacted earlier and threatening to break up when mine was talking and dating my "Friends"....she insisted it was just "i have more guy friends than girl friends"....yah right.

I distanced myself and kept banging her until she went too far. Then I just walked away.

yagnimos · 2017-03-22T23:49:39+00:00

I will usually reply on AskTRP in a way that disagrees with most people here.

But this time, fuck. that. shit. Don't give a shit, do what the others say.

Assume it's over with her, but I think STILL have a 'talk' if only so that you expose yourself to this kind of experience. Every time you do anything with anyone it is a learning experience, approach this as such.

You talk to her only to experience this, not for her, but for you and your learning.

Edit - Forgot to say, try not to get salty or insulting. Take the high road every which way you can

Relationships_shit · 2017-03-22T23:52:26+00:00

When a dog bites you put it down

FrameWalker · 2017-03-22T13:47:31+00:00

"Talking in the theater nice one."

yungsed · 2017-03-22T13:54:13+00:00

Hard next, set up a date to have 'the talk' and flake at the last minute, then delete and block her on everything.

Title	LTR wants to have a "talk", what to expect/how to handle it?
Author	yungsed
Upvotes	19
Comments	53
Date	March 22, 2017 11:50 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/60u4at/ltr_wants_to_have_a_talk_what_to_expecthow_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-wants-to-have-a-talk-what-to-expecthow-to.88150 https://theredarchive.com/post/88150

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