Alimony

azwildcat74 · 2023-03-15T01:45:49+00:00

Rule #1 - Stop taking legal advice from your adversary. Get a lawyer.

azwildcat74 · 2023-03-15T01:59:17+00:00

FWIW - I just did some quick googling and it looks like if either spouse earns at least 40% of the household income they will not qualify for alimony.

Lawyer up and file on this bitch and get it over with.

Worried_Umpire7373 · 2023-03-15T01:45:39+00:00

She doesn’t know exactly how it will shake out. Without knowing Missouri law specifically (which is why you should ask a lawyer) it’s probably up in the air until it’s all finalized. Threats are empty. Get info and file if things are at that point.

Throwaway4120213 · 2023-03-15T02:30:00+00:00

You may or may not pay alimony.

But if your wife has threatened divorce - your best option is to file ASAP to reduce the magnitude of any potential alimony.

Typically longer you are married - the more you pay.

10 years is a good time to get out. I’d be very careful now as you are moving towards 15yrs which many States consider a long term marriage.

Schedule some free consultations with lawyers to understand your alimony liability for a 10yr marriage and what happens if you stay and your marriage reaches 15yrs, 20yrs.

Zebrig · 2023-03-15T09:39:17+00:00

She's saying she's going to go for it and get it. We have 1 child together, at which I know I'm on the hook for child support.

Fuck whatever the hell she's saying, GO TO A LAWYER AND LISTEN TO WHAT THEY SAY.

Child support is just that to support the child, if you have kids you should pay child support.

Everything else go to a lawyer, a good one if that is possible and listen to what they say, ask all your questions in regards to divorce.

A divorce is the end of the marriage, it's not a you and her agaisnt the problem, it's you against her, and you can bet your sweet ass that she will do everything she can to get the most of you, she will stack the deck in her favor in any manner she can.

SO GO talk to a lawyer and stop taking advice from your oponent. Implement 180 and grey rock (if possible), comunicate only about the essentials and the kid(s).

Be the best parent you can be, but she will not be your wife, so don't treat her as such.

Go to therapy if possible, talk to friends and family, go to the gym, do your hobbys etc. Keep your mind ocupied(friends, hobbys, kids) and your body tired(gym, run, walks, hobbys, kids). Eat healthy and drink alot of water, stay away from alchool.

You can even go on walks with your kids, go to the park, talk to them about them, learn more about them, what do they like? what do they dislike? what do they love and what do they hate? Make them understand that you are their father and will always love them, that any problem you have with your soon to be ex is not their faul, etc. etc.

Be the best, show them, teach them, do it so they can see what a man should be, be stern but fair, be supportive of them but don't baby them, talk to them in age apropriate matter, inform them of some things, not all just some, don't talk bad about your soon to be ex to them. Be the man you want your kid(s) to see you as, show them that even when the going gets hard that you can do it, show them that even when its hard you don't stop improving, teach them the meaning of perserverance, teach them not just by word but by actions.

This is a hard time so try to be the best you can, it will be hard but you can do it.

Best of luck to you and hugs from an internet stranger to you in this dificult times.

Edit: Sorry about any any mistakes, english is not my first language.

EnvironmentalAd3558 · 2023-03-15T05:59:50+00:00

10 years. In California and New York and some others you would be looking at permanent alimony. I am in Texas and the rules are different here as they are in many other states. Temporary alimony during the divorce proceedings is common here if it is necessary to maintain the 2 households but not permanent alimony after the divorce or a short time after the divorce unless there are unusual circumstances.

Don’t listen to your wife about this. She certainly is not going to listen to you.

You need a good divorce attorney and you need to jump on this fast. Try to be the first one to file and serve.

General advice is to stay in the home until sold, go for 50-50 on assets and debts as well as child custody.

wisstinks4 · 2023-03-15T05:13:49+00:00

I am not an expert at the rules. Basic knowledge you may have to pay her 10 years worth of alimony based on the number of years married. And it could be anywhere from 1000 to 4000 a month. Another example of our broken legal system for men as related to divorce.

yeldellmedia · 2023-03-15T05:16:02+00:00

Bro. Get a lawyer asap and file first. You may very well have to pay alimony as the higher earning spouse… happened to me… file first so you are the plaintiff. I was married for 8 years and was hit w 5 years alimony of 2500/month

Initial-Photo3577 · 2023-03-15T15:22:13+00:00

I think im the one idiot that wants to pay her whats shes due.

pk2at · 2023-03-15T15:13:04+00:00

I would file for divorce ASAP, take a lower paying job, hide all the assets you can, not cooperate with discovery,pretend you cannot work due to back pain etc. Use every trick in the book to lower your financial liability

derelictherds · 2023-03-15T20:08:19+00:00

Doesn't matter what she says or thinks. Hire a lawyer and stop discussing divorce with her. "You might be right" was one of my favourite phrases back when I was in your shoes.

jerrylovescash · 2023-03-15T22:53:20+00:00

Lots of good advice here from people that have gone through the pain.

Make sure you protect yourself and your child and that you are being fair to yourself.

start with consultation and get a good picture of what is going/ your options on and what you want.

Divorce is all about money, and this money is what makes your future (easier or harder)

Title	Alimony
Author	Muted_Opportunity528
Upvotes	10
Comments	19
Date	March 15, 2023 1:34 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/11rhzsr/alimony/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/alimony.1218329 https://theredarchive.com/post/1218329

Comments