Child support and alimony

Puzzleheaded_Monk_39 · 2024-07-14T15:41:13+00:00

I’m in the same boat. Alimony tax will be paid by her at least. If you’re getting a lot in bonuses can consider an ostler smith table. I go to mediation in two days so let’s see what I get reamed with

HerbEverstanks · 2024-07-13T13:26:32+00:00

IL. 5k a month for 8 and a half years for a 9 year 10 month "marriage". She scams SSDI for $1700/mo and doesn't work. Prob got her student loans paid for also. I even got to pay for part of her lawyer fees (21k).

No Kids. She IS the child. She had $50k in her checking account right before the trial that took 3 and a half years to get with 4 of her different lawyers. She prob has $150k in there now. I never had close to 50k in my account even after a 21k loan from my 401k was deposited in there to pay per the judges order. I went house poor while she drank and Fd other guys while I was at work supporting her.

IL is prob 2nd worse to CA. I'm guessing NY is 3rd.

SwimmingOk7595 · 2024-07-12T19:48:18+00:00

Software engineer

Kylar26 · 2024-07-12T19:34:40+00:00

What do you do for work?

Unfortunately as you already know, you are in one of the worst states for divorce. Definitely try for a one time settlement if possible.

Personal_Falcon2081 · 2024-07-12T13:39:37+00:00

If she gets a good enough lawyer, she won't be reasonable. Women are highly suggestible to selfish recommendations. They thrive in the drama, so having a cut and dry enemy to destroy is a game for them.

Flashy_Yam967 · 2024-07-12T11:20:11+00:00

Is there a way you can drastically reduce your income over the next 1-2 years, pass a somewhat straight face test and then file?

I'd rather go from 200k to 60k, struggle hard for two years financially, do a divorce and then climb back up. You may see child support go back up when your income goes back up, but alimony may be in the mirror and long since settled at small or nothing.

jolleyutah · 2024-07-12T06:03:19+00:00

The bigger question is how to deal with eventual retirement? If you end up on the hook for lifetime alimony (Permanent Spousal Support in Utah) how can you ever retire? I've been married 31 years, been on the verge of divorce for 5 years, am 51, would like to retire while I can still climb stairs. The thing that's on my mind is how will retirement work? If she takes half of my retirement savings, do I stop paying alimony as soon as I retire? Can I retire early and be done with Alimony in that case? Either way, I'm sorry you are going through this. I wish I was brave enough to rip the bandaid off rather than living in misery.

conker574 · 2024-07-12T03:44:38+00:00

Its a chess game now....

Don't worry about being right, or winning arguments...

You're only goal is to -one way or another- persuade and convince this woman not to take you to the cleaners.

JustTheSpecsPlease · 2024-07-12T02:51:13+00:00

Your gut is right. Do everything you can to get a settlement. While the payouts are crippling, you can prevent being on the hook to her forever. And that's not hyperbole. It sounds like you've been married for more than 10 years, which opens the door to lifetime ~~servitude~~ alimony.

The only upside is that she'll have to pay tax on her payouts as income. You don't get to write a damned thing off (federally, at least), but the government sees her payments as her income.

Shitty upside. I know.

TheBoyBand · 2024-07-12T02:30:47+00:00

YUP.. sounds bout right for CA

Title	Child support and alimony
Author	SwimmingOk7595
Upvotes	4
Comments	14
Date	July 12, 2024 2:02 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1e15yrs/child_support_and_alimony/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/child-support-and-alimony.1524027 https://theredarchive.com/post/1524027

Comments