Does anyone else ever get the urge for revenge?

smc0881 · 2026-02-26T01:04:17+00:00

I been in a better mental place since my divorce. I haven't dated or hooked up with anyone in the years since. The sporadic contact I've had with my ex though confirmed the revenge played itself out without my assistance at all. The dude she was still in love with reached out to me and confirmed things with me. She got back with an orbiter dude that was in love with her since high school. She lied to be about having cancer a year after the divorce and tons of other lies I found out about after the fact. Her son who was a nightmare to deal with also did some weird shit, which resulted in the FBI calling me to try and track them down. I also had concerns about her son and I'd get told "you're not a parent" or she'd blame everything on his Autism (Asperger's).

dpatron · 2026-02-23T22:04:32+00:00

I have a buddy that showed up to his divorce hearing with a 25 year old badie in a skin tight blue dress with his ex wife's Tiffany watch on that she was demanding in their previous discovery hearing. The court house guard dropped his coffee when they walk in to go through the metal detector. The fact he pulled this off gave me so much happiness for divorced men everywhere. But take comfort that the next cuck who gets in line for a man's ex will be treated just like we were.

ItsHowItisNow2 · 2026-02-23T18:42:53+00:00

I will man up and be honest…yes indeed. Even after 8 long years…particularly at her older sister, who is a horrible person and a major Nancy Narcissist. She was the main driver for the marriage collapse, also a couple of her female friends, who “ride” their husbands and got into my ex’s head with silly ideas that would never have worked with me. I will never forget or forgive her older sister…that I know. But then…I have never been happier now that I am a free bird!

TeddyPSmith · 2026-02-23T14:52:22+00:00

Yeah I hope she gets herpes

jarnock · 2026-02-23T14:40:04+00:00

The only thing I think about is how to respond to nasty texts from her - do I match energy? Be petty?

The revenge feeling will fade with time.

TheMindfulWarrior9 · 2026-02-23T13:38:19+00:00

Yes, I have felt very tempted in my situation. My ex-wife had an affair with one of her patients at the hospital She works at. her job and reputation is everything to her.

I’ve been very tempted to send evidence that would either get her fired or hurt her reputation

Candidate_Worldly · 2026-02-23T13:07:52+00:00

Yes I'm heavy with grievance and resentment even after 18 months separated. My life is shit now, half the time with my daughter is unforgivable to me.

Saying goodbye to her every other week is always fucking awful. I live in a shitty flat that costs me a fortune to be close to my kid.

I am anxious angry and short temprered nearly all the time. I have an emptiness now that I can't shake. I'm so fucking lonely. My view on women and relationships is in the gutter. I hate feeling like that.

26 years together and she destroyed everything. I know how you feel about revenge. For ages I was ready to tell my ex that how she acted was unbelievable. But lately I'm thinking' what's the point'? The response I would get wouldn't help. Just have to try and move on, but its a struggle man, as you know.

psychcaptain · 2026-02-23T09:56:30+00:00

Not so much revenge as I want justice and to have my pain and heartache seen and felt by my ex.

My understanding is that the pain she caused will catch up to her. It will take a while and I won't be there to see it, but regret shows up especially with how she ended it.

(Note, that is not saying anyone wants to get back together, just that there will be regret).

upvotersfortruth · 2026-02-23T08:06:49+00:00

I've been in the revenge business for so long, now that it's over I don't know what to do with the rest of my life.

~ Inigo Montoya

star-cursed · 2026-02-23T05:29:57+00:00

Anytime someone has wronged me, I just remember that phrase "existence is suffering".

They exist, therefore they are already suffering. And the more people they've wronged, the more they are or will suffer at their own hands. So I feel as though vengeance has already been served, and it's enough to satisfy that urge.

Treating others poorly always catches up, one way or another.

Maybe doesn't work for everyone, but works great for me.

nutscrape · 2026-02-23T03:08:06+00:00

I can relate. I put my thoughts up as a comment on an earlier post about to the desire for fairness and how sometimes you don't get it.

https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/s/C5QUBk1Efa

Subtle-Catastrophe · 2026-02-23T03:07:47+00:00

Of course. With compound interest It's human nature.

It's a terrible idea, though, and never ends in anything good. There is a reason why cliches are cliches. Here's a very true one: living well is the best revenge.

Title	Does anyone else ever get the urge for revenge?
Author	Odd-Exchange-3423
Upvotes	29
Comments	18
Date	February 22, 2026 9:51 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1rbyubq/does_anyone_else_ever_get_the_urge_for_revenge/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/does-anyone-else-ever-get-the-urge-for-revenge.1574060 https://theredarchive.com/post/1574060

Comments