My wife left me last August, I was active here months ago working through the pain. Finally early this year I got back online and started dating again. Mostly just online chats, a handful of dates here and there and a few one night stands. Had one friend with benefit thet ended kind of awkwardly. Met a girl that I really really like and had a lot in common with. We hit it off and by the third date I was really feeling it and I think she was too, it's like we were old friends but with crazy chemistry. Things got moving kind of fast and my old friend anxiety crept back in.

Everyday I'd have the same thoughts "she's too pretty for me", "how many guys has she been with?", 'Is she really over her ex?", etc. Plus at the same time I kept inadvertently comparing her to my ex (who wants absolutely nothing to do with me), etc. I'm having job anxiety, divorce/custody drama anxiety, and this just added to the pile. She sensed my anxiety but seemed okay with it because she said she has it too. We went camping this past weekend and I had the best time in recent memory. Great food, exercise, beautiful weather, and a beautiful woman to sleep next to at night. I was in heaven. Then yesterday the energy was different, she was taking long to answer text and not replying as much. My anxiety kicked back in and I thought to myself "why do I feel like she's going to break up with me all of a sudden". Then a short while later she texted me five paragraphs and breaks up with me. It's because she "thought she was ready but wasn't", and thinks I'm not ready. And I realize she's right.

So now I've got heartbreak on top of heartbreak to deal with not to mention my ex-wife fleesing me in child support and taking me through the ringer in court, ignoring me, and creating a situation where my lawyer is charging me a ton of money to keep me in the fight. I thought I loved this girl to be honest but it was a foolish mistake. And now I've got twice the pain to deal with. Take it from me boys, take a real thorough inventory of yourself before you put yourself back out there. I know we're all different and some of you this won't to apply to. But if you're still dealing with pain from your divorce and you tend to wear your heart on your sleeve like I do, just don't do it. I'm wrecked over here I even called into work for the first time today (hourly contractor with no benefits or paid time off, I rely on every cent to pay my ex and my lawyer). Just save yourself the heartache!