DV accused

FunkyTownMascot · 2022-11-29T04:43:40+00:00

Lawyer up and use your video evidence. Buy a bodycam on Amazon and wear it when you're around your ex and also when around the kids so you can record the things they are saying.

Be sure to mention her painkilller addiction and let the court know you don't feel the kids are safe with her alone.

xjeeperx · 2022-11-29T04:02:09+00:00

Gotta love the accusations. I was told not to kiss my child because I would spread “my nastiness”. But only one of us gets cold sores…and it isn’t me.

Pachuko_Cadaver · 2022-11-29T07:24:55+00:00

From one DV accused to another - all the best brother. I really wish I had some helpful or insightful advice for you.

All I can say is that she sounds quite unhinged, and I would hope that the court, or any court-appointed expert (such as a child psychologist), would be able to see through her bullshit. I imagine they see rubbish like this constantly, because it happens ALL the time.

You obviously had the foresight to be able to obtain video evidence of her behaviour - well done. I think it is beneficial that you could see a shitfight on the horizon and had time to gather such evidence. This can only be beneficial for you and your children in the long-run. A lot of blokes have the DV accusations sprung on them out of nowhere and do not have the time to react or protect themselves, myself included. I think you are somewhat fortunate in this regard.

It won’t be an easy road, but take solace from the fact that the current court orders are interim only. Your children are lucky to have a father like you who will fight for what is best for them. And don’t worry, despite the fact that they are currently parroting her craziness, they will come to see things the way they truly are. As much as children deserve both of their parents to be amicable and functional in separation, there is nothing you can do to mitigate her behaviour. You have done the best you can, and your children will come to recognise this, and will move towards you emotionally as they age. Have faith in them - they are half you, after all, and you will always be their Dad.

Keep us updated brother.

Small_Quarter_3673 · 2022-11-29T07:56:09+00:00

Play some fucking offense. Record all of these fake accusations and go get an attorney to go to court with and sue her ass. These women have some fucking balls

WartimeDad · 2022-11-29T08:08:53+00:00

In my very similar situation I got really worried about the GAL and the “coaching” that my ex was saying to kids. Exact same thing.

Anyway the GAL saw right through it in my case. I wouldn’t say it backfired on my ex the way it should have, but the GAL made the 50/50 determination.

My guess is the GAL will either do the due diligence and figure it out without that much effort, and then maintain the 50/50, or not do the due diligence but see the kids love mom and dad and so recommend 50/50, or the GAL is absurdly biased against you and it had little to do with the coaching of the kids. I wouldn’t worry about the GAL, but don’t expect more than 50/50.

I would worry about your kids hearing that stuff about you. It’s not good for them and it’s a damn shame your ex is a garbage mom. This just means you have to stay the course and be a great dad when you have them. They’ll sort it out in time.

tylerdurdensoapmaker · 2022-11-29T05:46:00+00:00

As others have said - make sure you have a lawyer and preferably one that knows the challenges some men face such as being victims of parental alienation, being falsely accused - ideally this lawyer is ready to litigate if need be. Start a journal and write down everything (but dont let your ex know you have a journal). Make sure you have a connection with the pediatrician and go to the doctors visits. Make sure you have cameras when you are around the ex or have in your car or house if you interact with her there.

Funny_Wolverine_9 · 2022-11-29T17:40:15+00:00

Ok brother. As someone who has been falsely accused of rape by the ex-wife (charged criminally), I suggest you record all interactions (audio or video) until you have a final order. You want to always be able to back it up if need be.

Just keep in mind, what you're going through is NORMAL and it's a shame the system allows women to have this power over father's who just want to spend time with their kids. Very sad what Feminism has done to family courts.

Lastly, I would focus on YOU. Work out every day, eat better, follow your hobbies, focus on work. You need to prioritize YOURSELF. I know it sounds harsh, but if you want to be a good dad, you need to be happy and healthy. My ex literally tried to destroy me mentally, emotionally, spiritually, through all the false allegations where I thought of suicide. But here I am. Still kicking and not going anywhere without a fight to the death.

Keep Strong. There IS Light at the end of the Tunnel.

Sugarandspice921 · 2022-12-02T05:22:45+00:00

Get your children in therapy as soon as possible. If they are being conditioned to say things like that you are being set up. You be proactive and tell the therapist that you think this is what is happening and you are concerned for your children’s mental health. I know someone who had a wife that convinced their daughter that Dad sexually abused them. He ended up with full custody but the girls had to have a lot of therapy. Nip it in the bud now.

Title	DV accused
Author	TheVikingLurker
Upvotes	12
Comments	11
Date	November 29, 2022 3:47 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/z7igo2/dv_accused/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/dv-accused.1141439 https://theredarchive.com/post/1141439

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