I’m having some issues dealing with self blame. It seems like it’s a very common story. There were some issues over the years and I thought they were in the past but turns out they were still on her mind.

I’m certainly not perfect and she did give signs of being unhappy with a few things. Covid had an impact on some things like regular date nights. And she started her own business so was always in the office working. I’d take care of house and kids a lot because I thought that’s what she needed. But our emotional connection eroded.

I actually said to a friend months ago that things between us are the best they’ve been for a while. Sex life was still good and although we were ships passing in the night a bit I thought we were content. Had been together over 21 years so I thought it was a comfortable routine. Then some guy hit on her and got her thinking I guess.

Anyway, nobody is perfect and I know she isn’t either. I just have a hard time thinking about the ways I screwed up. I’ve spoken about it with my counsellor and she helps explain it’s not all on my shoulders. But since it seems a common story I thought you might have some tips.