Still Attracted

TheFargoKid · 2023-06-24T17:37:38+00:00

Understandable. My ex was and still is, a smoke show. You have to focus on the negatives about them if you aren’t planning on getting back together. Like, yes my ex was hot and we had great physical chemistry, she’s a terrible mother and is hyper self-centered and lacks empathy.

metalmaniak68 · 2023-06-24T17:53:46+00:00

I’m 3 years post divorce. I mean yea I still think she’s physically attractive but I can’t stand to be around her so that helps lol. 9.5 years till the kid turns 18 so counting the days 😂

Throwaway19891953 · 2023-06-24T19:42:33+00:00

I'm in the same boat. 3 months past d day and I hate myself for still being attracted to her after all the shit she did to me and our kids. What helps me is to remember (i) all her negative sides and clear character flaws i.e. she's not a nice person and (ii) I had her in her prime all the way through her twenties and early 30s and she's deteriorating fast now and (iii) her AP is a good 10y older than her at least and I'm meeting girls 10-12y younger than me (they're all in their 20s) hahaha

Good luck bro

jimsmythee · 2023-06-24T17:53:57+00:00

Understandable. But if your marriage is over, time to go out there and meet other women . That’s the only thing that change feelings.

extramediumweaksauce · 2023-06-24T18:20:16+00:00

It gets better. Also luckily my XW is landwhalifying herself. That sow can't find a big enough trough.

jaihind123456 · 2023-06-25T15:28:25+00:00

Catter ... 23 years marriage and about to finalise divorce she wanted. I still look at her and fancy her. Muscle memory brings back interest in her. She was part of the family unit but one thing is that we are emotionally invested and thsts why we remember the things we had and goid times we shared. Letting go is really hard in a long marriage but my ex has no problem moving on ... I do feel guys generally find it harder disconnecting

Kalthak · 2023-06-25T04:36:20+00:00

I've been having a hard time with this. I have to just not look at her as much as i can. She actually got upset when I would tell her I found her attractive so i just tried to stop. Its been a little easier after she started being really petty with money. Its easy to stop being attracted to someone that acts unattractively.

tyyyy110 · 2023-06-24T21:37:12+00:00

Find someone else to take your mind off of the ex. Trust me... there's plenty of other attractive women..Don't waste time or thoughts thinking of the ole days....look for brighter better days

Adorable_FecalSpray · 2023-06-24T18:53:58+00:00

My Ex and I were together for close to 20. I wasn’t attracted to her for the last couple years we were married. Once she did the final discard and said THIS divorce is for real, I was 137% on board. Once the divorce was final I had an increase in peace by at least 50%.

Everyone’s experience can be different. The most important thing, I believe, is that you continue to progress and make yourself a better man. For yourself.

ProfessionalJury8447 · 2023-06-24T17:09:59+00:00

Ohh!! I understand this feeling it’s love ❤️ It’s nothing to feel bad about.. have been there before that’s why I know what and how it can be.. that’s all you need to do have her in mind as good 😊 not as bad no matter what it might be to your heart just see it that way on your part!!!

That’s my language to the world 🌎.. having a happy heart with the ways of God.

fredatbu · 2023-06-25T08:48:29+00:00

It’s annoying, but I remind myself that she is lying and hiding stuff from me, and the feeling goes away somehow.

LandOfSod · 2023-06-25T23:28:19+00:00

I’m right there with you. I moved out a year ago, divorce finalized on my birthday, two kids. Divorce went smooth, and it took a lot of conversations for me to realize it was my fault. She had plenty of issues, but it was my fault.

I’m still in love with her. She started dating a month and a half again.

So right now there is some dude at what still seems like my house with the woman I still love more than anything, mowing the lawn with a lawnmower I researched about for a month, with his shirt off. Later he’ll shower in the shower I fixed, and fuck the woman I love in the bed I built for us.

I’m sorry man.

Title	Still Attracted
Author	catter3423
Upvotes	19
Comments	24
Date	June 24, 2023 5:02 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/14hxyd1/still_attracted/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/still-attracted.1223410 https://theredarchive.com/post/1223410

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