I’m struggling to understand my divorce case and my lawyer hasn’t been helpful. I’ll explain below.

To preface the basics, marriage is under 5 years, no kids, no houses. She had a job ($80k) and I had a job ($85k) and we split rent and expenses 50-50. In 2021, we separated and I moved out of state to a higher paying job ($92k + 2 yr bonus and stocks in a vesting schedule). By end of 2022, we were both in separate relationships. Early 2023, she moves in with her boyfriend and by Q2 2023, we file for divorce. Of course, she immediately quits her $85k job and her $35k part time job and asks for alimony. I’m now making ($107k + stocks). We both hire lawyers and start the contested process.

1st court hearing, she gets awarded $200/week in alimony since she plans on going to grad school (a virtual program) and needs financial support. 2nd court hearing, literally 2 weeks after, alimony reduced to $75/week due to lack of credibility in some of her expenses (aka hasn’t paid $1 in rent or groceries all year despite saying otherwise in her financial statement).

It’s been that way for 6 months now with no trial in sight and they’re refusing to pay half of a 3rd party attorney to reach a settlement. My lawyer is saying I should pay for the 3rd party in full and I don’t think it’s a good idea since they are not collaborative. Now they’re saying they want to go to court again to request higher alimony.

I’m sincerely confused. How and why is she getting any money? There was never any financial dependence, and there has been no involuntary loss of financial support since she voluntarily resigned from her jobs. What do I do and how do I protect myself? I’m obviously worried since I’m now knee deep in debt due to legal fees and scared she’d take whatever stocks I vest since I worked hard for those and idk what to do.