Of course, there's no such absolute. But there are somethings that should at the least be red flags.

Here's a few to start, posting for a friend:

  • She's jealous or upset when you get a promotion or recognition at work, even though she's a stay at home Mom.
  • In the difficult discussion of life insurance, when the scenario of "all the kids die and it's just you and me left", she responds with "oh, I'd just kill myself."
  • When you, or anyone else asks her what makes you a good husband, she responds with "he's a good provider".
  • When you recognize another married couple for having any good quality of a marriage (cooperation, sex, work, etc..) and they respond with, "well, that's just not us".
  • When family plans are made and you're the last invited.