I’ve been separated from my wife for almost a year now. We’ve gone through custody battles which is an ongoing issue. We haven’t even begun to discuss assets, but to be honest, I’m going to walk away from everything just to be done.

When we first separated for several months, it felt like relief. Even though I was upset about the situation. Recently, I I have begun to romanticize how the marriage was. Occasionally, they will be nice moments that we share with the kids and I’ll begin to feel like it’s a huge mistake. Lately I’ve been having dreams where we’re back together.

But the I remember what it was really like. The controlling behavior. The tantrums when she would get her way. Her attacking my family, especially after my father died. So many reasons why this marriage was not healthy. Not to say I wasn’t perfect but whenever I suggested we need to work on something as a couple it was always “my issue.” So many sacrifice I made for us and our family only to be beaten down at every turn. Walking in egg shells.

I just wish we could have been the family we should have been. I hate looking at my kids think I failed them. I hate that she refuses to discuss the situation and immediately runs to a lawyer or files a court motion instead communicating. Accused me of being a raging alcoholic in the temporary custody hearing so the judge mandated I breathalyze every 6 hours when I have the kids (always blown 0 and my kids have never seen me with a drink in their life), I don’t blame the court for being overly cautious. I wouldn’t want that on my conscious if it were true. But she has weaponized everything.

When does this shit get better.