Any men on here?

Vandal865 · 2024-01-08T06:21:56+00:00

Honestly, it was just getting to know women better in real life. Once I was forced to leave home and actually experience real life, I honestly got hit by a bit of culture shock.

Whenever my female friends would come to me and vent about how insecure they were about their looks or how well they flirt was kind of humbling and also shocking. Realizing that these were the exact same problems I had and felt insecure about really made me start questioning whether my problems were that unique.

Learning about what women find attractive straight from the source also helped a lot.

Sure looks matter, but its only part of the equation, and most complaints about someone's physical features were more so complaints about how many men smell or don't groom themselves or have terrible fashion sense.

Will some women reject me because I'm short? yeah, but there's plenty more who care more about me having decent hygiene than whether or not I can reach the top shelf. Despite how desperate some guys think they are, they wouldn't date absolutely anybody, the same is true for women, and that's fine.

Another good side effect was learning just how shitty dating can be for a woman. Without even getting into how dangerous it could be, the whole "Well at least she has options" kinda falls flat when the majority of those options probably see her as nothing more than validation or sex fodder.

In my opinion, a woman's fear over being desired only for her looks is very similar to a man's fear of only being desired for his money. They're both valid insecurities that may lead to extremely unhealthy behaviors and attitudes.

I'm admittedly still caught up in Redpill thinking a little bit. I have to catch myself slipping into old thought patterns almost everyday, but really getting to know women and learning about their fears and opinions has done wonders.

bobandersmith14 · 2024-01-08T06:28:48+00:00

Dude here. Never was big into redpill, always hated tate, but I started getting into Hamza. I started looking down on women, but I didn't go too far down that hole thankfully. Ironically, hamza introduced me to this subreddit when he made a video supposedly dunking on a woman who posted on here about how her little brother was watching hamza and it scared her. I came to see this post for myself because I wanted to see both sides, and I realised thst hamza was misrepresenting her and being a douche. The final nail in the coffin was when he made a video about how to get girls obsessed with you. It was really creepy and encouraged emotional manipulation. That made me really pull away from his stuff and I haven't gone back. I guess its easy to let go of something you didn't hold onto tight to begin with, though.

eatfleshdrinkblood · 2024-01-08T06:33:04+00:00

K, so I was way more black pilled than red pil. But I held some red pill views as well. It just made me feel bad about myself and I couldn’t stand looking at women or the world that way anymore.

Dhunter001 · 2024-01-08T09:57:12+00:00

I never really considered myself "redpill" although in retrospect, there was a point where I probably would've if I knew what it was at that point lol.

I was in my early 20's. I'd say corny shit like "all women are h0es until they show me otherwise", and I'd openly express that, even to women who were interested in me - there were PLENTY (it's no wonder they ghosted me lmao). Unbeknownst to me at the time, a recent breakup - while I was glad to be out of that toxic relationship, left me bitter about women in general, plus the lack of success I had with the women I thought I wanted at that time fueled those bitter feelings.

It wasn't until I started doing some introspection and realizing that I was the problem, that's when I started approaching women, love and dating differently - much more open-mindedly.

I began to see the nuance in dating and relationships. I also began to understand that women aren't a monolith. It also helped that I started to go out and be around and have more healthy interactions with genuine women.

mysterious_123 · 2024-01-08T16:02:29+00:00

It’s that the guys are mostly grifters. Also, the followers of these guys have misguided anger towards women and lead astray by these guys.

You can tell the exaggeration in examples of supposed situations. Or the absurdity of their beliefs.

Now there is a meme from Reddit of a wife asking her husband to go on a girls trip and red pill guys eating up assuming she’s gonna go and fuck men the whole time.

lordDandas · 2024-01-10T10:49:44+00:00

I thought this subreddit was mainly for men, I didn't even know women were being affected cause I thought redpill was about what women want.

I stopped listening to redpill beliefs because I felt like it objectifies men and is blatantly misandristic. Mysoginy is nothing but a cope, in reality, no man wants to hear they will never be Loved and they must be strong otherwise they will be left behind. Listening to redpill caused me severe emotional pain, stress and made my social skills worse, especially with women, it made me insecure.

thrownawaytodaysr · 2024-01-08T14:38:16+00:00

I never aligned with redpill explicitly, but I did find myself going down PUA and other subs/online communities loosely aligned with the same value systems. I kind of reached a fork in the road. I was at least somewhat insulated by having female friends but the reality is that I was dealing with a lot of entitled attitudes and an independently developed Mgtow outlook.

I think of it like most kinds of habits, beliefs, or addictions. There's no one thing that makes you change so much as an accumulation of factors/conditions. At the end of the day, I realised that there's no easy, universally applicable answers. I got comfortable being single and having fun. I found value in friendships with women for what they were without any pretense. I also just started meeting more people without expectations. It wasn't always great but it was nonetheless more productive than not. I still have some beliefs that are toxic for me, but I'm working on those because I want to.

I probably could have gone a different way with a toss of the coin.

shawninpa · 2024-01-09T01:13:46+00:00

Destructive self harmful behaviors

Unhappy_Papaya894 · 2024-01-09T13:20:59+00:00

Personally I always had experience with women so I didn’t THINK I believed all the redpill rhetoric. Turns out I did believe some things- I sat and watched guys like Fresh & Fit (purely out of curiosity & entertainment) and the more I watched the more their ideologies sunk into my mind.

I found myself believing all women were cheaters and liars & while I didn’t believe my girl would leave me or cheat on me I did believe she was lying to me & that I couldn’t trust her.

This led to behavior from me that became overly off putting. I wouldn’t share anything with her, I never let her meet certain family members or friends. I didn’t let her into my life much at all. And while it is good to have healthy boundaries , she was very open with me and would introduce me and show me off to everyone. She gave me all her social media passwords & told me personal details and I never reciprocated EVEN when asked. I always thought she was trying to take the power in the relationship as well. This lead to me threatening to dump her or trying to “check her” and she would cry her eyes out. (I even believed her tears were BS because that’s what they (the red pill) taught me.)

Eventually she left me. The manner in which she did was pretty tacky but nonetheless she left & I was crushed. I reflected for some months and was able to analyze our relationship and my faults.

Since then she has reached out several times trying to get back with me. I haven’t replied & I have no interest in rebuilding with her. But I am sorry for how I treated her & with new women I date , I have turned a new leaf (a whole 180) and I stopped watching those guys. Now my mind is free from that & I just enjoy life , women & see people for what they are with my own eyes and experiences . NOT someone elses ideals or theories

the-aids-bregade · 2024-01-10T20:48:25+00:00

I'm still innit

UnfortunateJones · 2024-01-17T07:28:09+00:00

I was never a RP I think they are scum. Alpha make talk is based on captivity.

No functional society didn’t have women at the forefront. The more commodified women are the more tenuous the structure.

I like giving pep talks to those smart enough to leave.

Maybe they can inspire the next group to leave.

Title	Any men on here?
Author	trailmixgirll
Upvotes	19
Comments	34
Date	January 8, 2024 5:45 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/191dvo5/any_men_on_here/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/any-men-on-here.1242502 https://theredarchive.com/post/1242502

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