Are men and women most likely to cheat eventually?

LadylikeElectricland · 2021-09-14T21:38:58+00:00

Hope this doesn't come out badly, but have you consider what you want to do with our responses? If we tell you, no, most men and women are highly unlikely to cheat -- will this issue stop bugging you? What if we tell you that that's really the case, everybody cheats all the time (and brace yourself, trps are now typing exactly that), then what? Will you decide it's not worth pursuing relationships and turn into a hermit?

Yes cheating is painful and it happens more frequently than it should. There are no guarantees that the person you fall in love with will be faithful. But he/she/they may be exactly that. There are indeed people who do not cheat. And no, there is no magic litmus test that will help you to determine whether your partner will cheat on you or not.

Naus1987 · 2021-09-15T00:47:02+00:00

I think the average person is a victim to average impulses.

But unicorns and extraordinary people do exist. Anyone can be amazing with enough ambition. Just most are weak.

No one is destined to be a cheater. People just give up.

thetruthishere_ · 2021-09-14T21:50:01+00:00

Ive never cheated and never will. I wont be a piece of crap like that to who Im dating.

Jhamin1 · 2021-09-15T05:18:16+00:00

People tend to gather into like minded groups.

I talk to people who don't know anyone that doesn't cheat. I also tend to notice that that attitude is self-reinforcing. If everyone does it, why shouldn't it?

I have never cheated, most of my friends have never cheated (I am close enough to several that that I'm pretty sure I'd know if they did). I do know people that cheat and are cheated on, but in my world it is the exception rather than the rule. I keep hearing about how inevitable it is that we will all cheat, but I just don't see in in my life.

It has to do with how people see the world and relate to their own urges. "Because of Biology" we all want to eat until we are too fat to move and because of Biology we want to just punch people who annoy us but most people figure out how to moderate these impulses.

I do know it's easier to be fit if you have fit friends instead of being the only one who exercises. It is easier to not have every argument end in a fist fight if the people you are arguing with don't expect to end up swiging either, and it's easier not to cheat when everyone you know doesn't.

I wouldn't cut someone out of my life because they cheated on someone, but I would downgrade how much *I* trust them in all kinds of things, not just relationships.

atman714 · 2021-09-14T21:45:29+00:00

The highest figures I've seen show about 1/3 of people will admit to cheating. That's the highest, though. Typically I think it's about 20% of men and 13% of women. Sometimes it's inevitable, but there are things you can do to prevent it. Some obvious things are their history: did they cheat before? Past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior. Also, if they were in a relationship when you started flirting, that's a bright red flag.

Character-Mistake660 · 2021-09-15T07:44:29+00:00

Would you ever cheat eventually for any reason?

If yes: Then it’s hypocritical to expect your partner not to cheat when you won’t hold yourself to the same standards, and you should just enjoy your relationship as long as it lasts before one of you cheats. Or just have an open relationship/FWB.

If no: Then there are other people like you out there who also wouldn’t cheat. You just have to find one of them.

TashaDarke · 2021-09-15T10:23:33+00:00

There is some evidence that early humans lived in small groups where they were serial monogamists (Behave by Robert Sapolsky). Kids were raised in this group but the father of a child may be different between siblings. We've no way of knowing if these groups saw this as an injustice or betrayal; it may have been acceptable and the norm.

It's worth remembering there are a lot of ways different relationship structures work around the world, and monogamy is just one of them. Many of these structures see other partners as equals, part of the family and alike. Others an acceptable bit of fun. Involving others isn't always a breach of the relationship; however cheating indicates a break of agreed boundaries and trust between people.

Many times (not all) people cheat it's because they don't have the communication skills to resolve an issue in their relationship(s). Maybe they think it's kinder to a partner to not address an issue that will make them upset. Maybe they can see that the end result is separation but don't want to admit that; perhaps they're scared of being alone. Maybe they feel guilty about care responsibilities and don't know how to talk about their needs.

So is it inevitable? Not at all, even with multiple romantic partners. It takes courage, introspection and good communication to address problems in the relationship and in yourself. Lasting relationships take effort, and unfortunately if your partner(s) aren't likewise wanting to make the effort things won't go well. The best thing you can do is develop the skills in yourself to talk about the hard things.

Middle-Guava8172 · 2021-09-15T02:01:09+00:00

I’m a cunt, but I’ve cheated on most of my partners. The one special one, about 8 years ago, cheated on me. So I cheat and seek validation from strangers but it’s bc I’m unhappy with myself. To my knowledge most of previous partners have not cheated, once again, I’m just a fucking cunt.

unlivedbread · 2021-09-15T00:01:52+00:00

From studies it seems men are more likely

Anecdotally both genders are equally likely. It comes down to character traits

Title	Are men and women most likely to cheat eventually?
Author	spankyourkopita
Upvotes	3
Comments	13
Date	September 14, 2021 9:03 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/poblxx/are_men_and_women_most_likely_to_cheat_eventually/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/are-men-and-women-most-likely-to-cheat-eventually.1070428 https://theredarchive.com/post/1070428

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