Are RP standards realistic ?

ShelbySecretary · 2023-04-17T08:59:38+00:00

What a clever way to get men super frustrated and make them think those awful women are just EVERYWHERE huh? What a clever way to get men out of the dating pool so they can have more, huh? Sooo clever...

Incel_Finder · 2023-04-17T09:08:17+00:00

It's all an indoctrination. If you think about it, the red pill is a regurgitation of someone's beliefs and mindset that the rest then fall in line and accept without question.

If we take just one facet like AWALT: this term states that ALL women have the same nature in how they act and perceive the world - but as soon as you apply even the smallest logic to it, the whole thing falls apart as one expects considering there are a million different archetypes of women and what they seek, just as there are men.

Plus, the whole term was born out of frustration, not observation. Some guy at some point screamed "aaargh! All women are the same!" - little did he know that he was only targeting a particular kind of woman. Well of course he's only going to get the same outcome every time. Common sense right?

The red pill takes uninitiated men who are hurting and angry as well as timid to become aggressive and dominant and to look 'alpha' - that's a set of behaviours that sets him up to filter out many different archetypes of women that would actually be a decent match for him as a partner, and instead instills in him to seek out the "10/10" woman in terms of looks and 'value' - whatever that entails. That woman is only going to be attracted to the aggressive dominant type of guy - something that the above example guys aren't naturally. They only have that exterior facade and sure enough in due course the facade erodes and the real him with all his emotional baggage and shortcomings are revealed to her, which will make her resent him hard. He'll be left screaming "why are all women like this?!" - we'd all turn to him and say: congrats buddy you did this to yourself by taking on someone else's desires and beliefs.

Academic_Type624 · 2023-04-17T12:25:10+00:00

Just to add let's flip it and ask are RP standards for men realistic?

Men are expected to be unemotional, be rich, have loads of sex and look like a body builder while they're at it.

Doesn't seem realistic to me.

tromp-et · 2023-04-17T10:10:17+00:00

It’s not realistic at all because red pill men create the women they dislike. If every man would become red pilled everyone will be unhappy.

Soft-Neat8117 · 2023-04-17T12:15:58+00:00

Can't date single moms

If you're over 30, probably not realistic since most available women in that age range will have children from previous relationships.

can't date the jealous type

Everyone gets jealous sometimes, but some people do take it to the extreme.

can't date the social media girl

Most women use social media.

can't date broke women

Almost everyone is struggling in this economy.

can't date alcohol and drug girl

This one hits a bit close to home since I agree with this. I don't drink alcohol, I don't smoke and I don't do any drugs, and I don't want a woman who does these things either. But I know that the number of women who don't do any of those things are a very small minority.

can't date a woman without a father figure

Because in their eyes, being a real person requires a man in their life. They shit on men raised by single mothers too.

can't date a girl who's a feminist

Most women nowadays are feminist to some degree. Why would they not look out for their best interest instead of supporting a system that oppresses them.

znidz · 2023-04-17T09:48:23+00:00

I wouldn't think too hard about it. It's an entire framework for insecure, gullible idiots.
All of it is complete bollocks. Picking holes in the logic is like shooting fish in a barrel.

ResistPrestigious373 · 2023-04-17T14:11:27+00:00

It is NOT realistic what so ever. It's a bunch of predators looking to make money off misery. They are capitalizing off men's depression. The standards are completely unrealistic.

bigchangemichael · 2023-04-17T16:32:01+00:00

The only women dateable for Red Pill is a barely turned 18 year old woman.

wandering0101 · 2023-04-17T22:36:56+00:00

No they are not.

RP men don't get over rejection, and they tend to project to other girls their vision that "every woman will threat you badly"

They project that women are bad and do bad things.

mikayrodr · 2023-04-17T14:55:08+00:00

Can’t date anyone but can cheat with all of them…. Interesting “standards,” huh?

PunkerWannaBe · 2023-04-18T01:08:59+00:00

Nah, is not realistic at all.

Just like the standards that a few women have on social media (6 feet, 6 inches, 6-figure income) is also unrealistic.

Let people have their own unattainable standards and die alone.

StarTrippinn · 2023-04-18T01:18:07+00:00

Honestly they just don't like women in general.

Lemoineau11 · 2023-04-17T10:41:09+00:00

Honestly I don't wish anyone to date the jealous type, men like women. They seem extremely annoying. I actually like that they don't date feminists because feminists don't want to date them either

goodforpartsonly · 2023-04-17T12:40:49+00:00

As long as men set their own internal and external boundaries on each specific issue, they should give them a shot. I think telling guys to not even try pursuing these types of women is a mistake.

These standards are about pain-avoidance and deciding to opt-out instead of taking a chance. Getting involved with these types of women has a low-probability of leading to a happy marriage, but low probability doesn't mean impossible.

Verificus · 2023-04-17T18:57:54+00:00

I think the problem with redpill and similarly anti redpill is that both groups like to look at things in black and white. And I get it. Life is easier when it is devoid of nuance and context. Especially to those who aren’t socially calibrated very well.

Those standards to me, ARE, realistic. But they have to be nuanced and context needs to be added.

Some of the ones you mention seem pretty straight forward to me and I am sure if you asked 500 men who have never heard of red pill they’d agree. Those to me are: jealous type, alcohol and drug girl and single mom. That last one might be controversial but is it? As a man, do you want to be involved with a woman who has a father of her kids in her life? Do you think it is a good thing for a kid to have two potential father figures. If the father is absent, do you think you taking that space is generally speaking very healthy? There’s a 100 more questions to ask here and all of them can have good answers and I am sure there is an exception. But MOST single moms will not be a solid choice for MOST men. And not because of what these red pill idiots are spouting.

Social media girl? It depends. Each man has to decide for himself individually where they draw the line with what kind of pictures and vids they would accept their partner to put online. Me personally, I wouldn’t want to be with a woman who has 1000s of skimpy pictures of herself on Instagram because I can’t see a reason to do that unless they are a model and it is providing them their primary source of income. And even then I might choose to be with someone with a more “normal” vocation.

Feminist girl? It depends. What are YOUR ideals? If you are raised very traditionally and you feel comfortable with traditionalist idealogy then probably a feminist is not for you. It will likely lead to a lot of conflict, arguments and fights in the relationship. Do you want that? Or is it better to choose a partner that fits your worldview?

Broke women? I honestly don’t get this one. Do redpillers really say this? Most redpillers are kind of traditional so wouldn’t they want a woman who sits at home and cooks and takes care of the kids whilst being the sole provider? I prefer a women who works and is ambitious but I could also have a happy life being the sole provider.

Woman without a father figure I think is I think a generalizing statement and I do know redpillers like to generalize. But I believe if everything else during your childhood and forming years was top notch but a father figure is missing, it doesn’t neccesarily lead to a damaged individual. There’s just a higher propensity for someone to develop psychological flaws and kinks.

So which women are dateable? Loads! You only listed a few “negative” stereotypes but there’s billions of women on the planet. Many of them don’t fit any stereotype you listed.

AntiVictimhood · 2023-04-17T15:44:35+00:00

In moderation yes, these standards can be realistic.

I don't find this list totally outrageous. It is a simplification and imo could be used as a shorthand for men who lack dating experience and are totally naive about the red flags to be aware of when dating.

Single moms: I wouldn't date a man who had a child. Being a step parent is incredibly challenging, the person will almost always have some degree of contact with the child's other parent- and this can also create a ton of friction. I do see why some people choose to avoid this, particularly those who are young and date in an age range where people generally don't have children from past relationships.
Jealous types: dating a controlling partner sucks and can lead to abuse in extreme instances. Whether you're a man or a woman. I don't think the point here is to seek a partner who never experiences jealousy, however, there are some men/women who are jealous to the point of being controlling and trying to take away autonomy. This is a reasonable standard when you can differentiate between normal healthy jealousy and pathological jealousy that can lead to control/ abuse.
Social media people: Many people begin affairs through social media flirting and "sliding into the DMs" nowadays. As a woman, when I was single I'd actively avoid men who followed a ton of women and IG models. I think it's reasonable for men to also want women who use social media in a way to connect rather than seek attention and form romantic connections/ put out images that are highly sexualized. I'd be uncomfortable with my partner doing that too. Additionally, people who are addicted to social media and who love to share their entire lives would be a turn off for me as well.
Broke women: This is also fair. As a woman who earns a very comfortable income, I wouldn't want to date a man who earned significantly less than me or who had zero disposable income given my current position. I was fine with dating broke men in college because I too was broke, but as an adult it can be a turnoff. The irony with this standard in the RedPill context is that RP men tend to want a passive and submissive woman who is down with traditional gender roles. They want to be alpha men and have a traditional lifestyle but simultaneously resent women who don't want to work but also resent career women. This standard is silly if the men proclaiming to avoid broke women also want traditional gender arrangements and a more passive homely partner.
Alcohol/drug: I agree with this when it's to the extreme or even in moderation for some people. But I'd apply this standard to both men and women. I personally wouldn't date a man who used drugs or drank excessively. I think that's completely fair, particularly when you yourself are sober. Addiction and substance abuse are completely valid reasons to not want to date someone.
Father absence: For me, I'd be more concerned with how people manage and deal with their past and potential childhood traumas that impact them into adulthood- independent of whether they come from a single or two-parent home. Having unresolved issues that you're not aware of can pose challenges in the context of dating. But ultimately, it's not the fault of a child for having an absent parent or losing a parent, so I wouldn't personally adopt this as a dating standard. I think a more useful standard may be "avoid dating people who have unresolved and unaddressed traumas that manifest in destructive behaviour".
Feminist: this is tricky because "feminist" means something very different to each person. And there are some exceptionally radical feminists who do in fact stereotype men and have double standards for men and women that would be off putting and alienating as a man. I have personally met women who are "man hating" feminists and I don't resonate with their version of feminism despite considering myself a feminist. But I don't think RP cares to learn the differences in feminism or even speak to men and women about what they mean when they call themselves "feminists". I think they have learned to equate "feminist" with "misandrist" due to viral social media clips and those compilation videos of women saying "all men are trash" and things of that nature.

I think these standards can mostly be reasonable when applied with nuance and also while emulating these standards oneself. Except for the feminist and absent parent standard. I think those should be reevaluated.

I think if these are double standards though (wanting a sober woman despite being a partier, or wanting a woman who doesn't really use social media despite your feed being filled with scantily clad women), then the standards are not realistic. In my experience, women who fit this criteria would be looking for a man who does so as well to a commensurate degree or in parallel ways.

Sigmasilly · 2023-04-17T17:07:42+00:00

RP says you can date those kind of people - - just not commit to them or get too serious, because they will hurt you (without even trying or meaning to be mean/selfish/piggish). Those types are so self-centered (solipsistic), that they’re the female equivalent of a 17 year-old boy who “thinks” he loves a girl - - until he gets what he wants - - then he turns-into a total piece of crap to that girl who gave him what he wanted (he’s done with her since he got what he wanted {what he thought he needed} and he will no longer be unselfish with her; he can’t even help it at that point - - he’s fallen “out of love”).

EugeneRider · 2023-04-17T12:52:48+00:00

Technically—traditional women.

Bible has it right—virtuous, selfless and strong women.

The reason why they reject the above mentioned is because they commonly lack responsibility.

If you’re a responsible person, you won’t be broke.

Fatherless women usually lack discipline incredibly. Feminists are usually super angry over anything related to their situation.

Alcohol and drug, needless to say.

Social media heavy users usually have uncontrollable ego and hard to deal with.

Jealous and single moms… you get the idea.

The solution is actually simple though. Put yourself in a mother’s shoes and think:

What kind of woman is good for MY son to date?

Do I want him to date a loser?

Do I want him to date someone irresponsible?

Do I want him to date someone who only thinks for herself?

The list keeps going.

RP standards are the counter to today women’s unrealistic standards—over 6 feet tall, 300k–2 million annual income, hot or handsome, a wallet who looks after the prize etc.

Just think about it.

UPDATE:

Sorry I'm breaking reality to you snowflakes. Reality check is pretty harsh isn't it?

I know this is exredpill, but I want you to think in the perspective of a manager, or a responsible parent: Would you like your kids to date irresponsible people? Would you like your kids to deal with people who can't get their shit together?

SecondEldenLord · 2023-04-17T16:21:58+00:00

You mean being a good provider as a man and non promiscuous as a woman? Yeah, would say that is very highly possible.

StarTrippinn · 2023-04-18T01:31:52+00:00

I love the idea of these weir...men not wanting to be with a woman who is too successful while also not wanting to support a woman. Should it be like the standards of social welfare? Is there a mark above the poverty line that a woman should fall? 107% above the poverty line? 120%? They want a woman to be able to pay all of their bills yet live paycheck to paycheck?

I will say that people definitely change as they get older. I had a long term relationship with a man who said he would never date a single mom, chunky women, or hairdressers and low and behold thats exactly who he's been with for about 5 years now lol. This woman is obese, had a chile before they met, and is a hairdresser.

Ive also seen men in RP who literally go out into the world and date the very same women RP says not to and their brethren are like omg! Why did you do this?

Because people are fucking people who can still be intelligent, compassionate, committed partners despite whatever circumstances they find themselves in.

Toxic_king2 · 2023-04-18T04:58:40+00:00

I'm gonna be honest. Avoiding all the women you listed doesn't sound that bad or hard lol

TheseNthose · 2023-04-18T18:52:49+00:00

Is this bait?

Most of what you put up there isnt attractive in the least.

Let's ask your own question but flipped around.

Can't date a deadbeat dad? Cant date a jealous insecure man, cant date a man obsessed with video games? Can't date a broke guy? Can't date an alcoholic or drug abusers? Can't date a momma's boy? can't date a Redpiller?

So exactly which men are dateable?

SupaRose_19 · 2023-04-18T21:48:28+00:00

All of this is nonsense.

Title	Are RP standards realistic ?
Author	prolific1997
Upvotes	19
Comments	57
Date	April 17, 2023 8:31 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/12p85e4/are_rp_standards_realistic/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/are-rp-standards-realistic.1214712 https://theredarchive.com/post/1214712

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