Question

Comfortable_Intern57 · 2021-05-23T21:37:44+00:00

It's black and white, us vs them, Narcissistic thinking. My dad was a single dad, but apparently that's ok in their eyes, but me as a single mom, well there's just something wrong with me because obviously I'm a whore or something simply because I'm a woman. Most women who are single moms did not want to end up there nor were they expecting that, just like for my dad. Shit happens and sometimes you don't find out until it's too late that your SO is crazy, a Narcissist, abusive, drug addicted, cheating, etc. My dad caught my mom cheating and then she ended up with an abusive husband after the divorce so my dad got custody. I found out my daughter's father was cheating and he kicked me out and abandoned us both even though he was the one who wanted the kid and got me pregnant without my consent, but somehow that's all my fault right??? It's not by dad's fault my mom cheated, it's her fault. It's my fault I'm a single mom, I should have chose better. But my dad, he chose fine right, because AWALT or some shit? It's all just stupid sexist bullshit.

LadylikeElectricland · 2021-05-23T21:08:20+00:00

Why are you with somebody who thinks you just want to 'fuck and party and lie and cheat'? Is this the person you want to rely on when you fall on hard times?

If you are looking for permission, then, yes, you are should most definitely and pretty much instantly ghost him. He's a trash person and you won't be able to change him. Get out before he seriously hurts you.

KingKarream · 2021-05-23T21:33:13+00:00

I don’t know who he is, but with the way it’s looking, he may end up clashing with you over what he believes and who you actually are and what you believe. Since the red pill is basically mainstream now, it’s not surprising he along with many other men have picked up on it. It’s up to you as to whether or not you want to put up with it and show through your actions that this ideology is bs. If he’s deep in the red pill, things can eventually spiral out of control in the relationship. I speak from experience, and I’m surprised I managed to bounce back from all of that. But it has burned a lot of bridges for me. If you can and want to, do whatever you can to keep him away from these cult leaders and in his own skin.

thetruthishere_ · 2021-05-23T22:41:56+00:00

I personally would not date someone that follows those yahoos. Its a screaming red flag to me. Id dump him so fast. I would not be with someone with this toxic AWALT mindset.

Toxic people make you toxic.

It will always be in your relationship and will probably burn you. You posting this is enough for me to tell you to run as fast as you can away from him and find someone else.

Plenty of people on both sides are crappy and I know darn well many men are crappy but I dont have a toxic mindset with AMALT baloney. I will never fit all men into a box like RP does women. Its not healthy.

But its your choice, as a fellow lady though, runnnnn!

Yveskleinsky · 2021-05-23T23:40:11+00:00

Here's another way to view this. Let's say you are black. Would you date a guy who felt all black women were gold diggers, whores, or otherwise will be the downfall of him? I'd hope not. Red pill= misogyny. As long as he has this mindset, he will blame all of life's problems on you. Men that are this defensive don't get deeply attached and they don't love. Instead of trying to change him, your time is better spent figuring out why you would date someone with with such an abusive mindset. I know you mentioned you love him, but loving someone isn't a mature reason to stay in a relationship...especially if they are treating you like you're the enemy.

the_C_Atheist · 2021-05-24T04:16:02+00:00

I don't know your boyfriend personally so I'll refrain from commenting on his character as it would be libel for me to mischaracterise him.

However, I understand how a lot of sad lonely men can get sucked into people like Matt Cross' opium. People like Cross gain cult followers that way - by making it seem that the sad lonely men are the victims of some great injustice and they should rightly be the ones with the woman on their arms, not the 'bad boy jerks' who have those women. Remember Elliot Rodger, who shot up a bunch of people because he was angry he couldn't get a girlfriend? There are ALOT of people like Rodger on his YouTube channel - really really angry young men. Cross, like any alt right demagogue (ie Coach Red Pill/Alexander Grace) is extremely seductive in his diction and makes you feel that it is society that doesn't value 'hardworking and decent' men like yourself since modern women by default prefer 'lazy good for nothing bad bois'. It's a nice coping mechanism for frustrated single men to think that other men with girlfriends don't 'deserve' their girlfriends, but you do, and the world isn't fair.

But I wonder why your boyfriend would still subscribe to Matt Cross since he already has a (presumably) loving girlfriend. I can see how I would probably be into this red pill bullshit if I wasn't able to get a girlfriend, but since I have a loving girlfriend and I've never been mistreated by women, this red pill stuff seems rather superfluous to me. And there are some very concerning characters on these forums.

I knew a MGTOW guy back in Sunway college (where I did my pre-university in 2008) even before MGTOW came into existence - boy was he a joy to hang out with. He kept saying stuff like, "Why do the females in our college dress like hookers if they don't want to have sex with us?" (It's Malaysia - it's HOT 🔥- I also wear tank tops all the time but it was okay with him because he didn't want to have sex with me) "I don't need a woman! Free independent lifestyle - just a sports car and a nice bachelor pad for me!" "You know how women age compared to us men? It is our good fortune to be guys - women really cannot maintain themselves no matter how many cosmetics they use - in the end they mostly still decline in their 40s while we men look okay even in our 60s."

It's clear the dude was just really really frustrated nobody wanted to touch his peepee, but he had such a nasty personality, I can't blame the girls for avoiding him like the plague. He's a really successful engineer now (to his credit, he was VERY driven, aggressive and competitive when studies and career are concerned) and I'm just a poor English teacher, but he's never been able to have a successful relationship because of his shitty attitude. Even when you hang out with him as a guy, you notice he has a rather paternalistic 'Tom Buchanan' sort of vibe.

But back to your boyfriend - Why he would still subscribe to red pill demagogues is beyond me since obviously he hasn't had trouble attracting a woman. Why would he even need red pill if he's got a girlfriend? You have to ask yourself that question.

secret-tunnellll · 2021-05-24T05:43:46+00:00

Dude why are you with him? He doesn't respect you as an equal, doesn't respect your intelligence, just straight up doesn't respect you. Why are you wasting your time with someone who truly believes you to be less than? You may think "Oh but I'm different," like NO! You're a woman, he actively worships content that preaches women bad mentality. To me, that means he doesn't respect you.

I'm sorry but I just don't see how this could possibly be a healthy dynamic. Girl, you can do so much better than this. You deserve a boyfriend who sees you as an equal, a true companion, rather than just some pretty face he's so far above.

Swordfish1762 · 2021-05-24T11:06:07+00:00

My question: Why is he still your boyfriend? For your own sanity -- dump him. He's beyond hope or help.

PhulloPheomelanin · 2021-05-24T06:47:51+00:00

Haha I should have you and my fiancée talk to each other

Carloverguy20 · 2021-05-24T22:53:28+00:00

To redpillers, single moms were bascially the former hot girl from grade school that didn't want them when she was in her prime, but the redpillers went to college, grad school, military, trade school, has a high paying job, house, car etc, and they see the woman who rejected them, a single mother. There's a whole meme about this the "Beat it chick meme" that describes their ideology.

Your Bf needs to be de-radicalized soon from that movement, it's toxic and cancerous.

secret-tunnellll · 2021-05-23T21:39:43+00:00

[removed]

OneComfortable3508 · 2021-06-07T21:34:27+00:00

Run. Find a guy who isn’t slowly oxidizing with troubling thoughts. You will thank yourself later.

pubgmisc · 2021-05-24T07:11:05+00:00

He is right. Your boyfriend follows people who believe that authority and responsibly go together. You seem like a good gal, but you as an exception is not the reality of how things are. Try dating women and you'll see that want all authority and no responsibility. Only 10-20% of men date 80% of women and we all have the same experiences that's why it exists (majority of men can't date in 20s, because we don't have traits that women look for, yet). All the things you mentioned in the post is from a female perspective.

Check out the Fresh and Fit podcast to see the perception of reality dynamics of women and men. It's conversational.

The reason why dating single moms is bad is because it tells a lot about her. Bad life choices in keeping a man around by bringing no value and selecting alphas (who have choice of abundance) instead of stable men, the man will never be the priority (with time and money), she will use and dump him later (happens a lot), the man can't discipline the child in the home, the man can't pass on his own genes ( then being cucked), usually a lot of entitlement.

Men and women are very different and I'll give you a few analogies. The way you care about a mans toy ship collection in his room for a relationship, is they way the man cares about your career or social status - he doesn't. (because we are not the same). Lets say you're engaged, you to Hawaii, he goes out to buy sun tan lotion. He leaves his phone in the hotel room. You see a notification. You see 2 texts from 2 different women. One asking for rent, the other thanking him for last week and the dinner. You're engaged. How do you feel? You feel that pain, anger, and confusion? That's how men feel like when their female partner posts provocative pictures of herself online for other men to see. Men see women as sex objects, women see men as success objects (hint: resources, especially if she will have a family, for security). We're different in other areas for example, if a woman cheats, it shows she already emotionally checked out of the past relationship. If a man does, it's like going shoe/hangbag shopping. He will still be prepared to die for his wife who he loves - because men and women aren't the same (btw some modern women see marriage as a wedding, not being a wife, even though marriage is a woman's goal. Relationships and marriage isn't a success metric for men). Self respecting men won't take sluts seriously either, so don't confuse sexual attention with commitment. Women don't care about a man's struggle, just wait at the finish line and pick the winners (women have attributes that men want, so they start dating whenever they want) and our burden of performance tells us this very early on (the things women like in a guy, competent, established, certain income etc, come in late 20s, early 30s, it starts). That's what Rich is trying to tell men. Bring up your value and select a good woman, someone who you can make a family with, and not be cucked.

ironmanalex97 · 2021-05-23T23:48:50+00:00

So the main argument I hear about single moms is that they tend to be a bad investment financially also it gets to the concern of what home life is going to be like. Will the step father have permission to discipline the kids. As to the idea of getting someone out of that mindset tbh it’s very hard they need to learn for themselves and you can’t really show them because they’ll be in the head space that you are wrong. It’s quite fickle like most things you become so open minded that later you become stubborn and closed off.

Advicer2020 · 2021-05-25T16:25:41+00:00

I think it goes both ways. I like the red pill mindset because it forces me to improve myself instead of blaming everyone else. When it comes to single parents it goes both ways. Richard coopers point is: it’s not necessarily bad news to date a single mother but it will bring a lot of extra stress. This applies to single dads as well. I as a single will hopefully find a woman that is single because if they have a child it’s not mine 100% , you have 100% responsibilities but 0% authority. It can make your life more complicated- that’s all.

Title	Question
Author	demodawgz
Upvotes	22
Comments	64
Date	May 23, 2021 8:36 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/njglew/question/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/question.756501 https://theredarchive.com/post/756501

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