He asked for a second date and apparently my sentence about planning it was filled with “pressure” 🙄

lillycrack · 2020-03-02T18:07:45+00:00

To a normal adult, this is just...mild, welcome enthusiasm. If someone is excited to see what I have in mind/have planned I’d take it as a compliment!

The mildest non-pressure causes LVM to crack. The fact that he also immediately puts it on you/guilt trips you over the “pressure” is so gross too.

extraacct1234 · 2020-03-02T13:49:33+00:00

He has failed. He just bulked at the idea of having to do even a small thing for you because he's not really interested in you. Throw him back.

magenta_mojo · 2020-03-02T13:55:49+00:00

Jfc I’d hate to see how he handles a really stressful situation if he thinks THAT’S “pressure”

harrohamtaro · 2020-03-02T17:15:16+00:00

I went out with a guy who proactively planned the first date, but when we were discussing about the second date and I said I would leave the planning to him, he complained about the pressure too. For a long time I felt guilty about pressuring him, but on hindsight he was just a low-effort bro.

7_0f_9 · 2020-03-02T14:29:12+00:00

[deleted]

m4dam3x · 2020-03-02T14:05:25+00:00

You do not need to reassure him. He’s telling you who he is.

jazzyjazcons · 2020-03-02T17:13:32+00:00

Good job setting your expectations in a lighthearted way. He got the point. Let’s see what he comes up with.

breathein4luck1 · 2020-03-02T18:01:34+00:00

Wow, imagine him in a real life crisis? No thanks!

balladwilds · 2020-03-02T14:20:25+00:00

Oh he wont pull through. time to say goodbye

2020-03-02T18:15:03+00:00

oh my god. imagine being so fragile. if a guy said this to me i would be psyched to show off my skills.

applepies4kittens · 2020-03-02T15:31:35+00:00

[deleted]

2020-03-02T19:27:17+00:00

You are doing him a favor by communicating your expectations. Dudes complain that they don't know what women want. Then women tell them, then they get mad. They're shotting themselves in the foot and making it impossible for us to ever so the right thing.

Ya good op. Block him.

Rpwintraining · 2020-03-02T20:24:23+00:00

Pressure in organising a date? Seriously? Good to know straight off the bat he’s a flake and can’t handle anything. Yeet him back to trash land.

2020-03-02T16:02:01+00:00

He's a fucking loser and sounds like a toddler.

rinabean · 2020-03-02T20:45:52+00:00

He's not shy or anxious or just too head over heels for you or anything, if anyone tries to tell you that just ignore them. I'm a very nervous person but I wouldn't send a message like that. I want to hide my nerves and I'm aware people find it offputting, so if I was trying to impress you, no way would I say that. I might be panicking on the inside about the pressure but that message is nothing but manipulation, perhaps anger at your insanely high standards of... having fun on a date. Trying to get you to back down entirely, or to lower your standards and he can say 'well I told you it was so much pressure :('. Or so you're glad he asks you out at all, you ignore whatever red flags he's setting off.

So this isn't about being a nervous wreck or anything... for all we know he sat there really cool and collected writing that. Or maybe he really was intimidated and pressured. But he sent the message to manipulate you, no other reason.

Davina33 · 2020-03-02T14:09:52+00:00

Time to cut your losses.

Title	He asked for a second date and apparently my sentence about planning it was filled with “pressure” 🙄
Author	dizzingly
Upvotes	87
Comments	29
Date	March 2, 2020 12:48 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fcbkbv/he_asked_for_a_second_date_and_apparently_my/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/he-asked-for-a-second-date-and-apparently-my.681127 https://theredarchive.com/post/681127

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