How do you stop hoping?

purasangria · 2020-02-21T03:53:56+00:00

I just went through this same thing, and finally deleted all my OLD profiles and decided that I'd leave it to the Universe/God/Angels. I got really tired of the parade of LVM, and now life is much less stressful.

I've decided it's more likely that I'll meet a compatible man when I'm doing the things I love, so I joined a running club, and I'm enjoying it.

Whenever I find myself wishing for a partner, I ask, "What's good about being single?" and I list all the things I love about being alone, like always knowing where the kitchen utensils are, buying art that I love while never consulting anyone, keeping the house exactly as I like it... There are definitely advantages!

Try to appreciate this season of your life, and focus on your hobbies, friends, and the things you enjoy.

Jay-quellen · 2020-02-21T03:55:01+00:00

Your life has so many possibilities and that's a pretty exciting prospect. Some mythical man doesn't define your future, you do!

Enjoy the journey; it's not all about the destination. Find yourself along the way.

ghygdryhchmmmmjj · 2020-02-21T05:11:30+00:00

The greatest inner peace I ever got was from deleteing my apps. Now I'm working on myself. Some day I plan to move to a large interesting city with a higher population where I will meet real people doing real activities. I currently love activities with my friends and the peacefulness of my own activities.

j_bo · 2020-02-21T04:07:51+00:00

You don't stop hoping. Hope is a good thing, it means you know what you want, you believe it exists and that you deserve it. Keep hoping. Hoping is not the same as expecting. Hoping is not the same as hunting. If your expectation is that the next guy you talk to could be the one then of course you are going to be disappointed when he isn't. So don't date until you can honestly you are not going to be discouraged or negatively affected if it doesn't work out. Why put yourself through that? Chances are the men you are the men on OLD are not that beautiful soul you are looking for anyway. The odds are not in your favor there. Put that time and effort into yourself, and cultivating your own beautiful soul.

NoThisIs-Patrick · 2020-02-21T04:05:55+00:00

I became jaded lmao

curlygirl507 · 2020-02-21T09:28:35+00:00

You have to fall in love with a different version of the future. The future doesn't have to involve a man. It can be just you doing all the wonderful things you want to by yourself.

CuriousCatNYC777 · 2020-02-21T04:36:22+00:00

Don’t give up ever.

I know this is much easier said than done!

Make sure to look outside of OLD because most HVM don’t like the dating apps. They’re also not on the market for long so you have to be highly strategic .

Don’t settle or give up.

hvmhunter · 2020-02-22T05:12:52+00:00

You'll never find a man worth commiting to before you turn 30.

It's simple - men say they lust after youth and beauty. So they keep fooling around.

Unfortunately, we only know who isn't wearing the pants when tides are over.

Mollzor · 2020-02-22T14:16:23+00:00

I don't do OLD anymore. There's no point. Besides the disappointment, it just reinforces my old pick-meisha behaviors that I've worked so hard on changing. It brings out the worst in me. I mean, how do you create an online dating profile without screaming 'pick meeee!' ?

stRf1sh · 2020-02-21T14:55:44+00:00

2 book recommendations: How to be single and happy (don’t remember author) AND cursed (Jess Mccann). Really changed my outlook and made dating easier for me. I dk is this sort of thing gets downvoted on this subreddit but- focus on being a good person and being grateful for your life instead of “getting a man”. Be kind to people. Enjoy going out and having a drink even if a guy isn’t your guy. Doing so will help you have a vibe that’s attractive to HVM (I know bc I have one). Don’t give your power away by feeling like your life is missing something. Dating can be tough if you have too many expectations and you’re running an agenda. It took me a few years of dating and prob 50 or more first dates before I met my guy.

Title	How do you stop hoping?
Author	itsallsoconfusing
Upvotes	30
Comments	15
Date	February 21, 2020 3:31 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/f754ha/how_do_you_stop_hoping/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/how-do-you-stop-hoping.681852 https://theredarchive.com/post/681852

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