There's a quote I saw years ago that really changed my thinking: "To an intelligent woman, a man's compliments serve as an evaluation of the man. To a stupid woman, they serve as an evaluation of herself."

I believe this is how to evaluate flattery directed at you, and how to evaluate abuse as well. For the most part, men are not telling you about you, they are telling you about themselves. Perhaps they are telling you "this is what I think women want to hear", or "this is what I value in women", or "this is the depth of my thinking". The information can be useful.

What are some of your experiences with this?