I‘ve been seeing a guy who turned out to be a LVM. He has put down my appearance and blows hot and cold. At first I knew I had to dump him but I stupidly gave him a chance, then another chance. Being around him drains me. He’s lovely and attentive, but then suddenly he becomes cold and mean. He speaks to me terribly and then tells me I’m too sensitive or can’t take a joke. He told me I’m much hotter to him when he’s drunk. It’s starting to feel like gaslighting. I said this to him and he was upset and said he’d change. He hasn’t. Today I actually started crying in his company because I’ve never felt so lonely with another person. I just told him I was having a bad week.

My appetite is gone now and my confidence is shrinking.

I don’t know why I don’t have the strength to let go. I keep thinking about his good points and I think I’m just afraid to be alone. There’s also something about being around someone who lowers your confidence in this way, somehow it makes you more reliant on them.

I’d really appreciate some advice! Thanks.